Ok Ladies, I need your thoughts on this....Men, would like your input also

[blind_otter]

Hah. Assuming things.

 

I've been in and out of rehab for about 7 years. I am currently in out-patient counseling. Honestly it won't work until I do it for myself. I have no insurance. I'm on medicaid. But even if I did go into inpatient treatment it wouldn't work.

 

I've done AA, rational recovery, NA, private rehab programs 3x between the ages of 19-22. My addiction issues are related to severe PTSD from rape trauma syndrome.

[scarlyjones]

you are making excuses because you still WANT to drink. Are you really trying to get ANYONE to believe you drink because you have no choice? Do people a favor, .....and dont hand out advice or knowledge about "recovery" when you dont seem to know first hand what thats about or what its like to even WANT it. You drink because its now become all you know. Admit it,....you cant even PICTURE your life without booze. You're scared. Its not because you dont have insurance (neither did I). No insurance wouldnt stop you from calling 911 if you went into severe withdrawl or Delirium Tremens. Its not because you were raped. These are all reasons how it will be scary,..yes,...but not why you CANT. So stop bullsh*ting us and yourself. Recovery is right around the corner. All you have to do is WANT it. You dont, obviously....

[scarlyjones]

Out patient counseling doesnt mean squat when you are countering everything you may gain by going home and boozin it up.

[scarlyjones]

you have never even TRIED in-patient treatment. You have NO idea if it would work. How could you? The only reason you wont go is because you still want to drink. A little glass of liquid runs your entire life. A bottle. Pathetic. You wont go into IN-PATIENT because you know that you cant get to any booze while your there. THATS WHY.

[blind_otter]

Originally posted by scarlyjones

you have never even TRIED in-patient treatment. You have NO idea if it would work. How could you? The only reason you wont go is because you still want to drink. A little glass of liquid runs your entire life. A bottle. Pathetic. You wont go into IN-PATIENT because you know that you cant get to any booze while your there. THATS WHY.

 

I've been in in-patient 3 times. Good thing you are not an addiciton counselor. I was sober for 2 years until I had my miscarriage last December. But you wouldn't know that.

[scarlyjones]

Noticed that you didnt answer a single question I asked. Figures. You are either a teenager or atleast you act like one. I noticed you are going out on a date tonight. Funny,.............you KNOW you have major addiction problems yet you dont mind bringing someone else into you baggage filled lifestyle. lemme guess.........after your miscarriage you stopped going to meetings or never went in the first place, right? And one doesnt need to be a counselor to know that its not that you cant be helped,..but its because you REFUSE to be helped. Partying is still way too important to you. Well,..whatever,.........soon nobody will want anything to do with you,....you will be so strung out on booze your liver will shut down,....you will go into the physical withdrawls and evetnually you will die. But im sure you think that, THAT can never happen to YOU. Those are things that happen only in the movies or to OTHER people. If you cant imagine it,...then it isnt real. pathetic. I feel sorry for you. You really think this is a respectable way to live.

[blind_otter]

Originally posted by scarlyjones

Noticed that you didnt answer a single question I asked. Figures. You are either a teenager or atleast you act like one. I noticed you are going out on a date tonight. Funny,.............you KNOW you have major addiction problems yet you dont mind bringing someone else into you baggage filled lifestyle. lemme guess.........after your miscarriage you stopped going to meetings or never went in the first place, right? And one doesnt need to be a counselor to know that its not that you cant be helped,..but its because you REFUSE to be helped. Partying is still way too important to you. Well,..whatever,.........soon nobody will want anything to do with you,....you will be so strung out on booze your liver will shut down,....you will go into the physical withdrawls and evetnually you will die. But im sure you think that, THAT can never happen to YOU. Those are things that happen only in the movies or to OTHER people. If you cant imagine it,...then it isnt real. pathetic. I feel sorry for you. You really think this is a respectable way to live.

 

What? I'm not going out on a date tonight! Maybe you have me confused with someone else.

 

I never said I thought it was respectable. You are way to reactive. I'm sorry if I offended you, but I don't understand why you are so invested in my personal life. You don't know me. I will quit drinking when I am ready to quit. I've been in rehab, in private programs, and in counselling long enough to know that. I keep quitting and then I fall off the wagon and I start on day one. I haven't had a drink since saturday and I am trying to stay sober. But having someone bitch in my face that I will never get sober doesn't help. So. You are going on BLOCK.

 

I will save my associations for people who will help me and support me in my process of trying to get sober. Input from people like you does not help.

 

Also if you have an issue, either PM or start another thread. This is called "hyjacking".

[Teag]

I'm sorry if I caused this post to become an arguement, I'm just trying to figure out what I need to do conserning my H. Both of you have given good advice & insite on whats going on w/ my H problem, so please end the arguement now, please post on any other advise or insite you may have for me & my H. You both have been helpful to me in understanding my H does have a big problem w/ his drinking and I thank you both along w/ everyone else that has given me advice.

[scarlyjones]

Im sorry,..............its just that you cant possibly do right by advice given by someone who is using similar excuses to continue to drink as your H. Take it from someone who HAS had enough finally and gotten sober,.....maybe an intervention would help. Force him to atlease LOOK at his problems THEN he can decide what,..if anything,...he wants to do about them.

[Teag]

.....maybe an intervention would help. Force him to atlease LOOK at his problems THEN he can decide what,..if anything,...he wants to do about them.

 

My H got arrested about 2 months ago & has to attend P.T.I.(Pre-Trail Intervention) so he's required to take drug & alcohol classes so I'm hoping that will help alittle. I'm praying that will, he starts this program May 26th, so keep you fingers crossed for me that this will help him, I'm not sure exactly what kind of classes, if its like a rehab or what I'm not sure so.....hopefully after he gets through maybe he'll at least realize he has a problem, then maybe REALLY want to get help.

[scarlyjones]

As long as he goes into it not thinking something like "Damn judge,.....making go to this stupid class..." If he goes into it with a good attitude then he should really get something out of it. God Bless...........

[New_Wife]

Pardon me for jumping in here - but may I suggest al-anon for the wife? It's a great program. Shoot, it's darn near a family staple in my family of origin. The folks there won't tell you what to do - just help you find a peacful place within yourself to decide.

[Teag]

Pardon me for jumping in here - but may I suggest al-anon for the wife? It's a great program

 

What is this?? I've never heard of it.

[New_Wife]

WOW! Really? Well, allow me to introduce you!

 

Please google Al-Anon.

 

It is the spinoff group of AA (alcholics Anonymous) for family members & loved ones of the person with the addiction. This is a support program for the folks whose lives are affected by another's drinking or addiciton. It is a wonderful place where you can safely discuss what is in your heart, the hurts of the addiction, the dissappointments, and learn from others how to love with boundaries, or let go if that's what you need to do.

[RecordProducer]

Originally posted by scarlyjones

Recordproducer,seriously,...please indulge me. What is your definition of a problem drinker? And an alcoholic? Please,...tell me.

 

It's not MY definition. It's a medical one. Alcoholism is a congenital mental disease. If you are predisposed to have it, you can barely fight it unless with abstinence.

Heavy drinkers are able to not drink for days, if necessary, they just choose drinking as their life style. They drink, but they are lucky enough that their brain is not addicted although it seems to people from aside that they are. But they can quit without physical withdrawal symptoms.

[scarlyjones]

Originally posted by RecordProducer

It's not MY definition. It's a medical one. Alcoholism is a congenital mental disease. If you are predisposed to have it, you can barely fight it unless with abstinence.

Heavy drinkers are able to not drink for days, if necessary, they just choose drinking as their life style. They drink, but they are lucky enough that their brain is not addicted although it seems to people from aside that they are. But they can quit without physical withdrawal symptoms.

 

Holy crap...........you have GOT to be kidding me. Alcoholism doesnt mean the drinker nessessarily drinks everyday or in the morning or nonstop!! You can be an alcoholic if you only drink on weekends. Its the amounts you drink and what you do WHILE you drink that makes you an alcoholic. Any recovering alcoholic will tell you that. Do you REALLY think that someones NOT an alcoholic simply if they dont drink Monday thru Friday? And you arent predisposed to have it. Is a disease that can affect ANYONE at anytime. It is hereditary ALSO. That means that if it runs in the family you are MORE likely to have it. They arent the ONLY ones to become alcoholics though. It doesnt HAVE to run in the family in order to get it. "they just choose drinking as their lifestyle" .....<------that is the most ignorant statement Ive ever read on the subject. Almost laughable. The term "heavy drinker" is the answer someone would give if asked "whats an alcoholic?" for crying out loud.

[New_Wife]

Step one of ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS:

1. We admitted we were powerless over

alcohol—that our lives had become unmanageable.

 

That's it guys. Sorry. No more or less complicated than that.

 

But for complication junkies who think more words must = better:

 

"Alcoholism is recognized as a major health problem. In the U.S., it is the third great killer, after heart disease and cancer — and it does not damage alcoholics alone. Others are hurt by its effects — in the home, on the job, on the highway. Alcoholism costs the community millions of dollars every year. So whether or not you ever become an alcoholic yourself, alcoholism still can

have an impact on your life.

 

We have learned a great deal about how to identify and arrest alcoholism. But so far no one has discovered a way to prevent it, because nobody knows exactly why some drinkers turn into alcoholics. Doctors and scientists in the field have not agreed on the cause (or causes) of alcoholism."

 

Source: A brief guide to Alcoholics Anonymous, This is A.A. General Service

Conference-approved literature.