LookAtThisPOst Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 For those of you familiar with Meetup.com, it's a really an online dating site as it's a social networking site that allows people with similar interests or motivations to join together in real time for a pre-scheduled event. Just this past Labor Day Monday, there's this one Meetup that is pretty much inactive with attendees during "normal operating hours". You're lucky to even see more than 5 RSVP for an event. Usually it's just the organizer's face and no more. Then on Labor Day BBQ event, over 50 people RSVP'ed for the event. I have to tell you, it's pretty much telling when that happens as if it were a mad dash or running of the steelhead salmon. A "shopping spree" if you will. I noticed this pattern with any Meetup that's normally got tumbleweeds rolling through it and them BOOM, during a 4th of July Picnic, Memorial Day BBQ, or whatever holiday...people who haven't attended an even with the group for 3 years since joining, decide to show up. I don't know, but isn't this quite telling that there's a meat market mentality to Meetup with some of these people and not an appreciation for fellowship? There had been complains from organizers about people joining their Meetups, but never actually attending them or flake out at the last minute because they found something better. Some even double book themselves. I recall a woman who came to my restaurant meetup, order her food, only to realize "Oh, I forgot, I RSVP'ed for Sushi Night at another Meetup. She grabbed her food in a to-go container and fled. I thought, "Must be cuter guys there or something." lol Also, I am thinking some only attend Meetups based on WHO is going. They just scan the RSVP list and if there isn't enough cute guys/gals, they won't ever go. They constantly lurk. Thoughts on this? Is your experience with people at Meetup events rather superficial and fleeting in nature? I used to get a kick out of people when they hook up with someone, you never see them again until a month or 2 later they are back and not with said person anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 You've posted about this subject quite a few times. It's down to choice. People can pick and choose what they want to do and everyone is perfectly entitled to do so. People will attend for all different reasons too - looking to date, meeting new friends, honing their social skills, because a friend of theirs wants to go, because it's just a fun day out and something different. People are also more likely to be drawn to something if they see that a lot of others are attending. The only way I could ever see the scenario changing is if a meet up group was made to be compulsory where every member must attend every event. The issue with that is no one wants to feel obligated in their social lives as that very soon would become just not any fun at all. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LookAtThisPOst Posted September 9, 2015 Author Share Posted September 9, 2015 You've posted about this subject quite a few times. Well, it bears repeating because only recently organizers I know have complained of this kind of situation. Their beef was Meetup allowing people to join too many meetup groups and as a result, people wind up double or even triple booking. I've even had a friend that I knew that RSVP'ed for event, but told me, "I really don't know if I want to go, as I'm still keeping my options open." But decided to fill a spot that an otherwise more committed member would have RSVP'ed in lieu of her. I think a lot of people "shot gun" RSVP multiple Meetups at once, then bail on all of them to attend one. Unfortunately, some forget to un-RSVP from the others which irritates the organizers. I mean I see some people that would join 50 or 60 events which enables people to flake out at the last min. on their RSVP's when they think something better comes along...or be complete no-shows because they found a more promising event. Some members have been booted from said Meetup after having been no-shows or flaking at the last minute. I had one woman that came to my restaurant Meetup, sit down, take an order, then while we were waiting for our food, realized she RSVP'ed to a Sushi event at the same time. She had the audacity to grab the food she just ordered, but it in a take-out container and leave. I thought it was quite rude. I'm an asst. organizer of said group...if I was the organizer I would have emailed her after I'd gotten home and would have given her a warning. This also wasn't' the first time she's done this ,but during our "organizer gab session" away from the regular members, this had been some of the complaints I'd been hearing about. It's down to choice. People can pick and choose what they want to do and everyone is perfectly entitled to do so. People will attend for all different reasons too - looking to date, meeting new friends, honing their social skills, because a friend of theirs wants to go, because it's just a fun day out and something different. People are also more likely to be drawn to something if they see that a lot of others are attending. The only way I could ever see the scenario changing is if a meet up group was made to be compulsory where every member must attend every event. The issue with that is no one wants to feel obligated in their social lives as that very soon would become just not any fun at all. Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 Sounds like Meet up has a lot of problems in your area. Why do you continue to use it? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LookAtThisPOst Posted September 9, 2015 Author Share Posted September 9, 2015 Sounds like Meet up has a lot of problems in your area. Why do you continue to use it? I use it mainly for board game night and hiking events. The rest is Facebook invites from people from Meetups of the old days that I get. Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 I use it mainly for board game night and hiking events. The rest is Facebook invites from people from Meetups of the old days that I get. Do the holiday droves get in the way of you enjoying your board game nights and hiking events? Link to post Share on other sites
Author LookAtThisPOst Posted September 9, 2015 Author Share Posted September 9, 2015 Do the holiday droves get in the way of you enjoying your board game nights and hiking events? Actually, they remain more consistent. It seems the more social club related Meetups aren't so much as they tend to have a revolving door of members funneling in and out of them. Not too many return members. Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 Actually, they remain more consistent. It seems the more social club related Meetups aren't so much as they tend to have a revolving door of members funneling in and out of them. Not too many return members. Oh, then it really doesn't sound like much of a problem after all. The activity meet ups are doing their job, and the social club Meet ups are doing theirs What's the problem, then? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 Perhaps you would be happier sticking to the board game and hiking type meet ups and decline from the social ones. Social is just that, it's designed for meeting new folk but if people attend and don't find people they would wish to befriend then they move on. Equally they may spark up some friendships in which case they likely then have made some new buddies to go and do different things with. Social events are more of a tool, interest events are more of a regular hobby. Say if everyone who attended a social meet up looking to date someone, went along and met no one attractive to them in dating terms and then went back and back to the same group as did everyone else then their chance of meeting someone to date will diminish if they give their free time to that one social group. Or, say someone went to a social meet and did meet someone. Great! But surely then they wouldn't want or need to attend every other social meet, they would likely go on dates, meet each other's own friends and do other things together. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author LookAtThisPOst Posted September 9, 2015 Author Share Posted September 9, 2015 Say if everyone who attended a social meet up looking to date someone, went along and met no one attractive to them in dating terms and then went back and back to the same group as did everyone else then their chance of meeting someone to date will diminish if they give their free time to that one social group. Or, say someone went to a social meet and did meet someone. Great! But surely then they wouldn't want or need to attend every other social meet, they would likely go on dates, meet each other's own friends and do other things together. I think the organizer's beef is that they are sick of their members just using their groups as a meat market, when it's a social club. That most members attend based on who is going to be there. One of the organizers used an analogy of not using photos similar to before the internet when people would receive invites to events in the mail. You were never privy to who was actually going and asking would be considered a social no-no. Funny, after one of our hikes, one of my good friends tried to get this one single lady to join me and him for lunch after the hike. She agreed during the last mile of our hike, but then she politely declined as we were on our way to the parking lot, but he seemed to like her enough to give her his phone # when she left to go home. Sometimes people are "looking" even in the special interest groups, but he's always been an avid outdoor enthusiast. Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 I think the organizer's beef is that they are sick of their members just using their groups as a meat market OK, then they have a beef with you also then? I've seen you post numerous times that you prefer using meet up to OLD. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 I think the organizer's beef is that they are sick of their members just using their groups as a meat market, when it's a social club. That most members attend based on who is going to be there. One of the organizers used an analogy of not using photos similar to before the internet when people would receive invites to events in the mail. You were never privy to who was actually going and asking would be considered a social no-no. Funny, after one of our hikes, one of my good friends tried to get this one single lady to join me and him for lunch after the hike. She agreed during the last mile of our hike, but then she politely declined as we were on our way to the parking lot, but he seemed to like her enough to give her his phone # when she left to go home. Sometimes people are "looking" even in the special interest groups, but he's always been an avid outdoor enthusiast. Sounds like the organizers are stuck in the past and resistant to change. Link to post Share on other sites
Author LookAtThisPOst Posted September 9, 2015 Author Share Posted September 9, 2015 OK, then they have a beef with you also then? I've seen you post numerous times that you prefer using meet up to OLD. No, they don't have a beef with me personally, they are just speaking in general. Link to post Share on other sites
GemmaUK Posted September 9, 2015 Share Posted September 9, 2015 No, they don't have a beef with me personally, they are just speaking in general. So it sounds like they are OK with regular attendees using the socials for dating but not the non-regular ones. Sounds very cliquey and not actually very social to me. If it felt cliquey then that would be one sure fire reason that I would not be a returnee. Link to post Share on other sites
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