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Trying to keep the friendship


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Hello!

I've started to develop romantic feelings for my best friend.

 

One thing! I'm single and this is not a story of being hopelessly in love with the "only girl in the world for me"...nonsense.

 

Basically we've been friends for a long time, but only platonic. She traveled abroad for 3 weeks because of work. She just got back, last night we went out with all the gang...and when we saw each other it was different for both...

 

Magnetism, attraction, whatever you will call it, we didn't have this before and this allowed us to be only friends.

 

This doesn't change the fact that she's on a relationship...which is cool by me, I constantly meet new girls I have great chemistry with that happen to be married or similar.

 

The problem then, it's how do I keep the friendship?

Just wanted to know the opinion of someone who has experienced something similar.

Some might say: go after her, chase her (ain't we all romantics?), in real life I've come to realize that it's better not to get involved in a love triangle. There are plenty of great single girls.

 

I just want my friend back from before she got all magnetic XD!!!

Nevertheless, I realize that things change.

 

I've made up my mind in not wanting anything with her...now.

 

What I'm about to do is:

 

- Just wait for a while, maybe it'll just fade by itself.

 

- Tell her (mostly on a funny note rather than a declaration of love) that for whatever reason I'm feeling attracted to her. (It's all her fault in my opinion :rolleyes:) That I'm acknowledging this and that it might pass soon. That if she was single I would act on it. That if she didn't mean so much to me as a friend I would act on it. She is my best friend and knows that I usually find great girls but feel more attracted to the ones that are trouble. So...she's trouble. Congratulations.

 

I just hope it doesn't get weird on the future.

 

Now, if she's feeling the same way and wants more that's where it gets tricky, for her, as she would have to work her sh*t out.

 

And to close things up, when pheromones take over and if we happen to be alone, the jerk in me might not care about any of the above.

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You just answered everything with your closing statement. You'll do something if presented the opportunity.

 

Yep the opportunity makes the thief.

 

And that's my nature. But still...my point on trying to keep the friendship is noble.

 

Thanks for your response!

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It is, but are you now preserving it in the hopes of the presentment of the opportunity or are you preserving it for its own sake rather than for yourself or her?

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It is, but are you now preserving it in the hopes of the presentment of the opportunity or are you preserving it for its own sake rather than for yourself or her?

 

100% for the sake of the friendship as it was before.

 

If I would be trying to keep an status quo, meaning leaving the door open to make a move on future....that would not be me! I normally say f*ck it all and make a move NOW!

 

But! These days you don't stumble on a friend that will be by your side on the bad days as well.

 

A friend is somebody you do things for without expecting anything in return (selfless).

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