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Just friends...?


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Is it really possible for men and women to be JUST friends after a relationship ends? A good friend of mine once told me that relationships can only move forward, never backwards. If that's true, then men and women can not be just friends after a relationship.

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emotionsmessmeup

I believe if you can be friends after a relationship, then it wasnt meant to be in the first place...

so hey...if it doesnt affect u..be friends...

but the moment u feel your feelings are comming back..BACK OFF...

thats just my way of looking at it...

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You can be friends with an ex. When you resolve all the nasty issues you can be just friends. Im friends with an ex fling. And my mum is very good friends with her ex, they were togeyther 4 years aswell. They hang out all the time. Granted he wants her back but..

 

I say if you feel its soemthing that you want, got for it, try it out. Life is all about chances..

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discoqueen23

Unfortunately, that seems to be the case. I keep telling myself me and my ex are "just friends," but in all honesty, "friends" don't do the types of things we do!

 

It's sad...

 

Some women will disagree and say they are able to do it. Well, hats off to them, they're stronger than I am!

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One of my very best friends right now is an ex-boyfriend I dated 3-4 years ago. Two other good friends of mine is are ex-flings (One of whom is married to the girl he dated both before and after me. I can understand why, because she's very sweet.)

 

I've also had friendships with ex's who were friends but just because they wanted me back. Those didn't really last as friendships, and I've lost contact with those guys.

 

I feel that if the person I dated is a good person, I shouldn't eject them from my life just because our relationship didn't work out. That person knows me in ways that ordinary friends don't and can be an excellent source of advice and a great person to talk to.

 

Thought it takes much longer to go back to just friends than it does to go from friendship to lovers, I think it can be done. In my opinion, the keys to becoming just friends are:

1. Know that you don't want to be with that person romantically. If you're unsure, you're going to find yourself wavering and probably end up back in bed with them.

 

2. Don't spend time together like you did when that person was your boyfriend/girlfriend. At first, until the feelings of wanting to be with that person as something more fade for both of you, it's best to keep it to public meetings and phone calls and to keep the frequency of them low. You have to redefine the relationship as just friends so it's not doing either of you a favor by mixing dating behavior with friendship behavior.

 

Of course, it also depends on what type of issues you have to deal with from the break-up. If it's something like cheating or other trust issues, you may not even be able to get the trust back as friends.

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