pheonixrisen Posted September 27, 2015 Share Posted September 27, 2015 Exactly this. I'm in a battle. I know everyone else thinks it's Lame and pathetic, but here it is. I've only felt like this a couple times. I don't mean love. I mean this strong, strong connection and chemistry, and these vibes, and this longing. Idc how long I've known him, you can't deny it's there when it's there. People don't like to hear that can happen, but it does. I think he feels the chemistry too. By the way he acted when around me. But of course I cant actually say for sur and speak for him. you have felt this a couple of times .....so probably have pursued those feelings and then at somepoint it has ended ..so you are aware that these feelings dont last forever ...hopefully you will feel them again with someone single On the other hand...all of the bad stuff that might happen, that you are all telling me.So it's tough for me. Easy for everyone else to say "he's married, just walk away" tough when here's a man who is what I want, and we seem to have this chemistry, and he's giving Mr the green light (sometimes) to all the emotional upheaval you will cause yourself and the wife ... if you choose to move forward ...yes as compared the easiest option will be to walk away ...not everything we want are healthy for us ...that's where boundaries/common sense/maturity /and ability to walk away from things that are not good for us comes in ... He said to me on the first day we met "I had a dream that us 3 would meet, like a premonition" it's weird. are you seriously thinking the above statement ...is something deep and important ...its laughable at the very least ...I don't understand you and how you understands and interprete things around you .... and I am really trying too ....are you that naive and gullible at 26 years ... Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted September 27, 2015 Share Posted September 27, 2015 You know what you want. When/if he contacts you again why not say, "I'm interested. I feel a connection. Please contact me again when you have divorced & you are available for the type of relationship I'm interested in perusing."? LOL. I'm sure the skid marks left by his hasty retreat will be epic. Then again, cheating married men looking to get themselves some side tail WILL future fake and make all kinds of promises they have no intention of keeping..... 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted September 27, 2015 Share Posted September 27, 2015 On the other hand...all of the bad stuff that might happen, that you are all telling me.So it's tough for me. Easy for everyone else to say "he's married, just walk away" tough when here's a man who is what I want, and we seem to have this chemistry, and he's giving Mr the green light (sometimes) He said to me on the first day we met "I had a dream that us 3 would meet, like a premonition" it's weird. Seriously, this whole thing sounds like a teenage soap opera. Yes, some married dirtball you met at the mall and have spent what - a total of a few hours with - is suddenly 'the man I want?' I've spent more time with my freakin' UPS man. Pickin's must be pretty damned slim in your town if a loser like this can get your attention that easily. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
eye of the storm Posted September 27, 2015 Share Posted September 27, 2015 Confusedovo, you claim you don't act needy and desperate with the MM. But I bet you do. We all love to believe that we can hide our inner feelings, but they shade everything we say, our word choices, our micro facial expressions, our body posture. And both people who know us well and those talented in reading people pick up on them. You radiate an aura of desperation and willingness to be used, I would lay money on it. your every choice points to it. Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted September 27, 2015 Share Posted September 27, 2015 He said he was rubbing my back to calm me down. Although tbh I was calm. He asked to come around. I said he can't come here, he asked why Honey, you are a BOOTY CALL. Nothing more, nothing less. You are a piece of meat to him, just another entry point in which to put his penis. Such men spend their whole lives on the prowl for weak, immature girls like you who are easy to conquer. In fact, you're probably Girl #116 to him. There are books and websites out there just for men to learn how to up their game, become better at picking up gullible girls like you who just need to hear something nice to believe the guy loves them, is really noble, wants the best for her. He doesn't love you, he isn't noble, and you are just a piece of ass to him. He's enjoying the game of getting in your pants. Once he gets in there, you won't matter any more and he'll move on for the next piece of ass. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Confusedovo Posted September 28, 2015 Author Share Posted September 28, 2015 (edited) I blocked him on WhatsApp about an hour ago. Now I'm wondering if I did the right thing. I asked him last night (through text) if he would rather me out of his life for good, I told him the hot and cold avoidance isn't fair. He replied with "I'm sorry I didn't reply earlier, how are you, I hope you're ok" I had gone to bed when he replied. This morning I text back just simply "why do you ignore me sometimes? " but his phone must be off as it hasn't sent. And his last time online was just after he text me. I'm so stressed over the situation that I just blocked him. I guess he's going to get the text still, and when/if he replies see I've blocked him. It probably won't make sense to him why I have. Maybe he will be relieved.... I dunno. I've done the right thing...right? Edited September 28, 2015 by Confusedovo 1 Link to post Share on other sites
eye of the storm Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 Yes you did the right thing. Because you took an action. You decided you didn't like the hot/cold treatment. Don't undo it. Leave it and move on. This guy will never treat you the way you want. He will always hot/cold you he will always say "sorry I didn't reply..." then he will change the subject and get you onto another topic. All without admitting that he didn't reply because he was busy with his family and you were not important enough to interrupt. Trust me, you did the right thing. Now, let go. Stop focusing on him. Its like watching food network while on a super strict diet. It is just torturing yourself. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 The only thing that will happen now is when he sees you blocked him, he'll immediately forget you existed and start looking for his next booty call. But good job on doing it. You're getting your self respect back. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Confusedovo Posted September 28, 2015 Author Share Posted September 28, 2015 Yes you did the right thing. Because you took an action. You decided you didn't like the hot/cold treatment. Don't undo it. Leave it and move on. This guy will never treat you the way you want. He will always hot/cold you he will always say "sorry I didn't reply..." then he will change the subject and get you onto another topic. All without admitting that he didn't reply because he was busy with his family and you were not important enough to interrupt. Trust me, you did the right thing. Now, let go. Stop focusing on him. Its like watching food network while on a super strict diet. It is just torturing yourself. Its like he doesn't want me to go completely. Giving me a lil (replying with hope you're ok, sorry etc instead of saying if he wanted me to go or not) maybe he wants me to hang on for when he wants me? He kinda beats around the bush, if you know what mean. You're right.. I'm tourturing myself. He/it is constantly on my mind. e only thing that will happen now is when he sees you blocked him, he'll immediately forget you existed and start looking for his next booty call. But good job on doing it. You're getting your self respect back. You're probably right. I don't think he wants me to let go, cause he must get some enjoyment from it I guess. Maybe he will just find the next. Im starting to see more.clearly, feel sorry for his wife. And I'm pi**ed cause I feel like he used me too. He knows I like him. He could've just stopped contact completely, instead he gives me lil bits of attention and hope. Does he even realise what hes doing? Meh. I have to work on myself. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 You were having sex with him, right? That's all he wanted from you. I can name at least 10 men I know who do this. Stay married, no intention of leaving her, just seek out gullible girls for the sex and for the fun of it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Confusedovo Posted September 28, 2015 Author Share Posted September 28, 2015 No we never had sex. But everyone on here thought that's where it was leading. We were very touchy feely with each other. Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 No we never had sex. But everyone on here thought that's where it was leading. We were very touchy feely with each other. Actually, it wasn't just that we know that is where it was.is leading....we also know that is exactly what you want, pregnant wife be damned. Which is sad. Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 No we never had sex. But everyone on here thought that's where it was leading. We were very touchy feely with each other. So you know, most men like him have several women they're working at the same time, each of which in varying levels of 'progress' in terms of whether he's gotten into her pants yet. He does that because most of the women will eventually get fed up at being used and end contact, so he has to have other women to fall back on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 grrr double post Link to post Share on other sites
Author Confusedovo Posted September 28, 2015 Author Share Posted September 28, 2015 Actually, it wasn't just that we know that is where it was.is leading....we also know that is exactly what you want, pregnant wife be damned. Which is sad. Did you see I blocked him? Link to post Share on other sites
eye of the storm Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 Confusedovo, some people start typing and miss new posts that are updated while they have their window open. If someone misses a post like that just let it go. I know it doesn't seem like it when a post makes you feel attacked but pretty much every poster is trying to keep you from a world of hurt. Focus on the fact that you made a positive action. You chose to no longer accept his treatment. You decided you are worth more than table scraps. Focus on you. Making smart choices. And being safe. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
pheonixrisen Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 I blocked him on WhatsApp about an hour ago. Now I'm wondering if I did the right thing. I asked him last night (through text) if he would rather me out of his life for good, I told him the hot and cold avoidance isn't fair. He replied with "I'm sorry I didn't reply earlier, how are you, I hope you're ok" I had gone to bed when he replied. This morning I text back just simply "why do you ignore me sometimes? " but his phone must be off as it hasn't sent. And his last time online was just after he text me. I'm so stressed over the situation that I just blocked him. I guess he's going to get the text still, and when/if he replies see I've blocked him. It probably won't make sense to him why I have. Maybe he will be relieved.... I dunno. I've done the right thing...right? Yes def the right thing for yourself ... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Confusedovo Posted September 28, 2015 Author Share Posted September 28, 2015 Yes def the right thing for yourself ... And his wife and baby. And ultimately him. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Confusedovo Posted September 29, 2015 Author Share Posted September 29, 2015 Ok....I unblocked him. And simply replied "hope you are ok too x" So.I failed. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Confusedovo Posted September 29, 2015 Author Share Posted September 29, 2015 Yes I really want his attention. I'm speaking to a few single (I hope) guys. But it's still him I want to talk to/see. It's embarrassing. I'm going to call about therapy tomorrow. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Confusedovo Posted September 29, 2015 Author Share Posted September 29, 2015 Why won't he just tell me to go away? To leave me alone? That'd make this so much easier. Link to post Share on other sites
turnera Posted September 29, 2015 Share Posted September 29, 2015 Why should he? He'll be in your pants in no time. This is how they do it. They push, then they retreat so you feel weak and unlovable, then they contact again, so that you're practically dripping with excitement to please them so they won't retreat again. Just so you understand, there's a whole world of information out there for men who want to screw as many women as they can. For example: The Cheating Spouse's Cheat Sheet: 36 things every guy should know before he cheats. Cheating Dating Guide: How to cheat your wife without getting Caught! http://guidance4men.com/seducing-a-married-woman How To Attract Married Women How to Date a Married Woman https://www.quora.com/Why-do-single-women-engage-in-affairs-with-married-men Link to post Share on other sites
Author Confusedovo Posted September 29, 2015 Author Share Posted September 29, 2015 Wow ok...this is new to me. I'm going to read those links. Thanks Turnera. Link to post Share on other sites
SoulStorm Posted September 29, 2015 Share Posted September 29, 2015 Why won't he just tell me to go away? To leave me alone? That'd make this so much easier. Why do you need his permission? Be mature enough to do it yourself. If you have to wait for a married man with a pregnant wife to tell you to leave him alone, when you are also giving him signals that you want to be with him, you will be waiting a long time or until after he's gotten into your pants a few times. Then he will dump you like yesterday's news when you start being a burden or jeopardizing his relationship to his wife. Seriously...are you even thinking? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
autumnnight Posted September 29, 2015 Share Posted September 29, 2015 Why do you need his permission? Be mature enough to do it yourself. If you have to wait for a married man with a pregnant wife to tell you to leave him alone, when you are also giving him signals that you want to be with him, you will be waiting a long time or until after he's gotten into your pants a few times. Then he will dump you like yesterday's news when you start being a burden or jeopardizing his relationship to his wife. Seriously...are you even thinking? She wants to put it on him so that when she sleeps with him and his pregnant wife is devastated she can deceive herself into thinking it was all his fault 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts