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Proud of us, but missing the drama


katielee

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Some people thrive on drama. Maybe, drama became your "normal". Drama demands attention and high emotion. It's as though without drama and conflict you lose some sort of control. I guess this ties in with your other thread about vulnerability.

 

yes, it was our MO for 5 years!

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I suggest maybe try to lose control in a different aspect of the marriage? Since yes, when drama happens it can get the heart pumping..it can get the adrenaline going and that is what can make people crave it.

 

So I'd suggest maybe..I dunno, trying to pump up the passion in the bedroom maybe? You can still get all worked up over each other..just in a way that is a lot more fun.

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Jacobclassified
what makes you think marriage should be deliriously happy? Content and secure with regular moments of great joy and no moments of great pain is the realistic holy grail of a long term relationship.

 

Is the search for deliriously happy what drove you to have an affair in the first place?

 

 

 

We all fear loss. Don't waste the present moment worrying about the future. Loss is an inevitable part of life, and the greatest reason to enjoy the present moment to the fullest.

 

i could not of said that any better.

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yes, it was our MO for 5 years!
The PEA chemicals in your bodies rarely last more than 4 or 5 years, if that long. Then you're left with either a 'real' love about everything, or a lust relationship based on the PEA chemicals, which is basically just just and a high on emotion.

 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/loves-evolver/201302/the-science-behind-falling-in-love

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Mr Mind of Shazam

This is exactly why I advise mentally healthy people to stay out of relationships with people who crave drama. If you don't provide the drama, they will. Is anyone really worth that? No.

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