OK Cupid - Demisexuality and other new terms

[LookAtThisPOst]

I'm starting to these new sexual orientation words that now go beyond just straight, gay, and bisexual.

 

Now there's new terms the describe other strange classifications. Saw a recent one "Demisexual" and had "Questioning" after that. I was thinking, "Demisexual, WTF is this, she worship demons or something?!"

 

Wouldn't you say it's a red flag when it comes to those who have ambiguous sexual orientations like this? I googled it, and it refers to a fuzzy area between sexual and asexual. Something doesn't seem to bode right there.

[LookAtThisPOst]

I wanted to add, what kind of seems to contradict their "Must have a deep feeling / attachment to the other person, before moving forward" seems to contradict their sexually explicit photos though.

[scorpiogirl]

No it's not a red flag. For crying out loud. People are much more complex than you in your limited understanding can comprehend.

 

There is somebody on the site who will not only identify with these people of differing sexual orientations, but will seek them out.

Not everything is a topic of discussion.

 

If you don't know what demisexual is ( by the way you've already discussed this) then it's not something you need to worry about.

[newmoon]

i asked someone on a site where they were from and they responded they were "country fluid." huh? yeah... let's just use normal words. if someone is using a word you don't know - like demisexual - just pass their profile. there are enough weirdos with 'normal' profiles to dig through. if you don't know the word you probably aren't what they're looking for anyway.

[GemmaUK]

It's not a red flag.

 

Just ignore the profile and move on.

If you don't correlate with or understand something in a profile then it's best to just move on to the next.

There is no need to question it.

[Imajerk17]

It can't be as much of a red flag as closed-mindedness.

[okc85]

Tumblr invented 50 sexual orientations, 60 genders, and 1,001 new social justice issues

[Keenly]

It's a red flag because you have some one trying to date who doesn't even understand their own wants and needs

[okc85]

It's a red flag because you have some one trying to date who doesn't even understand their own wants and needs

 

 

Yeah, that was my thought, but all the other posters here just jumped down OP's throat.

[Imajerk17]

To answer your question LATP, no, this woman isn't for everyone, but I think that is precisely the point. Instead of being everyone's cup of tea, she'd rather be someone's shot of whiskey. I really don't think she cares if you or a bunch of other people view her ways as a "red flag".

 

Something similar could be said about the women whom you think are too focused on travel, and all the other subjects of your threads.

[Photofinish]

It is a red flag.

 

Sounds like they want to be a special snowflake . Chances are they have a Tumblr account, trust me you dont want that.

 

Demisexual is just a label for being a decent human being but ya know, we need a "sexuality" for not being someone who sleeps around.

[scorpiogirl]

Who says they don't understand their wants and needs? Just because our brains know and identify with heterosexual way of thinking and follow society's "norms" doesn't mean others don't know their own wants and needs.

 

That's condescending to say that someone doesn't know what their own sexual identity is.

 

If somebody's orientation is "gay", would anybody question that they are red flags? You're going to take dating them off the table.

 

It's not Tumblr that's creating new sexual orientations. Society is finally starting to recognise that people are far more complex than we have thought until now.

If somebody doesn't fit into the mould that we know, do we have the right to call their sexual identity "ambiguous"?

 

GTFO

[LookAtThisPOst]

Yeah, that was my thought, but all the other posters here just jumped down OP's throat.

 

Right, it's starting into the same wheel house when society writes a misbehaving kid off as someone with ADD and medicating them. It's hard to tell the difference when someone actually has this as a legimate condition or not.

 

Same goes for the Bi-Polar condition, when it's actually someone that's just plain moody. There are fuzzy areas between someone actually having such a legitimate condition or not.

 

Some are just plain made up.

 

It's not Tumblr that's creating new sexual orientations. Society is finally starting to recognise that people are far more complex than we have thought until now.

 

No, people are just complicating their own lives.

[MissBee]

I'm starting to these new sexual orientation words that now go beyond just straight, gay, and bisexual.

 

Now there's new terms the describe other strange classifications. Saw a recent one "Demisexual" and had "Questioning" after that. I was thinking, "Demisexual, WTF is this, she worship demons or something?!"

 

Wouldn't you say it's a red flag when it comes to those who have ambiguous sexual orientations like this? I googled it, and it refers to a fuzzy area between sexual and asexual. Something doesn't seem to bode right there.

 

LOL!

 

I don't think it's a red flag, I just think they've been open about where they fall and it makes it easy for you to either avoid people whose sexuality isn't within the realm of what you're down with or date them if this works for you.

 

It's not a "red flag." Nothing is inherently wrong with it. It's like any other thing that someone has announced, if it doesn't float your boat, you have been made aware UPFRONT so if you still proceed with things, well that's on you.

[MissBee]

Who says they don't understand their wants and needs? Just because our brains know and identify with heterosexual way of thinking and follow society's "norms" doesn't mean others don't know their own wants and needs.

 

That's condescending to say that someone doesn't know what their own sexual identity is.

 

If somebody's orientation is "gay", would anybody question that they are red flags? You're going to take dating them off the table.

 

It's not Tumblr that's creating new sexual orientations. Society is finally starting to recognise that people are far more complex than we have thought until now.

If somebody doesn't fit into the mould that we know, do we have the right to call their sexual identity "ambiguous"?

 

GTFO

 

 

Ditto!

[Toodaloo]

A demisexual is a person who does not experience sexual attraction unless they form a strong emotional connection with someone. It's more commonly seen in but by no means confined to romantic relationships.

 

Demisexuals are characterized by a lack of sexual attraction toward any person unless they become deeply emotionally or romantically connected with a specific person or persons. The level of connection it takes for sexual desire to form is dependent on how close the relationship is rather than initial attraction.

 

Demisexuality is a sexual orientation in which someone feels sexual attraction only to people with whom they have an emotional bond.

 

Thats what a quick google search told me.

 

Sounds a bit like me to be honest. While I can observe a good looking guy and get a bit frothy and do the whoel girley " he is so gooowgeous" thing. I have absolutely no inclination to shag a stranger... I do however get really really hot over people I have a deep emotional connection with, just thinking about the person I am in a relationship with can leave my panties dripping... When I am with someone the only fantasies that turn me on are the ones involving them.

 

I don't see what the problem is there? Why is it that someone who is clearly going to be faithful and loyal to one person a red flag exactly???

 

I really am confused about this.

[LookAtThisPOst]

A demisexual is a person who does not experience sexual attraction unless they form a strong emotional connection with someone. It's more commonly seen in but by no means confined to romantic relationships.

 

Demisexuals are characterized by a lack of sexual attraction toward any person unless they become deeply emotionally or romantically connected with a specific person or persons. The level of connection it takes for sexual desire to form is dependent on how close the relationship is rather than initial attraction.

 

Demisexuality is a sexual orientation in which someone feels sexual attraction only to people with whom they have an emotional bond.

 

Thats what a quick google search told me.

 

Sounds a bit like me to be honest. While I can observe a good looking guy and get a bit frothy and do the whoel girley " he is so gooowgeous" thing. I have absolutely no inclination to shag a stranger... I do however get really really hot over people I have a deep emotional connection with, just thinking about the person I am in a relationship with can leave my panties dripping... When I am with someone the only fantasies that turn me on are the ones involving them.

 

I don't see what the problem is there? Why is it that someone who is clearly going to be faithful and loyal to one person a red flag exactly???

 

I really am confused about this.

 

Oh, well then, they just made up a name for someone who is looking for a long term relationship.

 

Why even slap a new label on such a thing? It's like they are taking a definition that had already existed and making up a name for it.

 

Now you say, "Deep connection with a PERSON" were we talking members of the opposite sex, same sex, or both? If it's both, then she's bi-sexual. It's as if thy are trying to put a spin on it.

 

It's like when the term "Metrosexual" came out. A faddish term.

Edited September 28, 2015 by LookAtThisPOst

[Toodaloo]

Now you say, "Deep connection with a PERSON" .

 

I think the little word a explains that its just one person.

 

I still don't get why you are all assuming that someone who needs to form a deep connection with another before they can get sexually aroused is a problem?

 

Personally I think it would lead to far less marriage breakdowns and unwanted pregnancies...

 

But if you guys want to see extreme monogamy as a bad thing I guess that is your choice...

[LookAtThisPOst]

I think the little word a explains that its just one person.

 

I still don't get why you are all assuming that someone who needs to form a deep connection with another before they can get sexually aroused is a problem?

 

Personally I think it would lead to far less marriage breakdowns and unwanted pregnancies...

 

But if you guys want to see extreme monogamy as a bad thing I guess that is your choice...

 

So it's just monogomy, not "Demisexual"

 

I mean, by that definition, even I could be considered demisexual, but I don't call myself that in the profile. Just "Straight"

 

Why even make up a name for it? It's confusing.

 

First there was Metrosexual, yet another faddish name...now they are coming out with these new faddish names.

[PaperCrane]

A demisexual is a person who does not experience sexual attraction unless they form a strong emotional connection with someone. It's more commonly seen in but by no means confined to romantic relationships.

 

Demisexuals are characterized by a lack of sexual attraction toward any person unless they become deeply emotionally or romantically connected with a specific person or persons. The level of connection it takes for sexual desire to form is dependent on how close the relationship is rather than initial attraction.

 

Demisexuality is a sexual orientation in which someone feels sexual attraction only to people with whom they have an emotional bond.

 

Thats what a quick google search told me.

 

Sounds a bit like me to be honest. While I can observe a good looking guy and get a bit frothy and do the whoel girley " he is so gooowgeous" thing. I have absolutely no inclination to shag a stranger... I do however get really really hot over people I have a deep emotional connection with, just thinking about the person I am in a relationship with can leave my panties dripping... When I am with someone the only fantasies that turn me on are the ones involving them.

 

I don't see what the problem is there? Why is it that someone who is clearly going to be faithful and loyal to one person a red flag exactly???

 

I really am confused about this.

 

Now, instead of having to explain all of that to someone, I can just use this neat little word 'demisexual' and people will often times understand.

 

I can think a woman is hot as hell, and if I have just met her and we end up in the bedroom...welp...sorry honey but it ain't happening.

[impatiently_patient]

I think the problem with this stuff is that it's a secondary preference after whatever your gender preference(s) are. For instance, I'm straight, and an assman. If I skipped the straight part, that would mean I could be turned on by men's asses. Yeah, not in the least.

[shet]

This post is disgusting. Who the **** made you the police of peoples personal lives and orientations. You won't bat an eyelid if some woman says she's only into guys over 6 feet but you have a problem when someone says they only engage romantically with friends. What business is it of yours, how does it affect you what other people feel about themselves.

 

Considering 90% of this forum and its members are all about high-turnover dating, third date sex, "sparks" with someone they just met etc, I'd say demisexuality is a needed term.

[LookAtThisPOst]

This post is disgusting. Who the **** made you the police of peoples personal lives and orientations. You won't bat an eyelid if some woman says she's only into guys over 6 feet but you have a problem when someone says they only engage romantically with friends. What business is it of yours, how does it affect you what other people feel about themselves.

 

Considering 90% of this forum and its members are all about high-turnover dating, third date sex, "sparks" with someone they just met etc, I'd say demisexuality is a needed term.

 

It impacts me, because I'm trying to determine what the term even means to see if they are someone I'd like to date.

 

I mean, even I have to have a deep romantic connection with them before getting sexual with them just like the in the OP, but I wouldn't CALL myself demisexual.

 

Also, learned of the word "pansexual", man...what will they come up with next? LOL Is that when you have an attraction to Peter Pan and take trips to Neverland?

 

Unless, of course, it's a "deep sexual connection' with someone of both genders, which would make her bi-sexual. I thought sexuality of sorts was in regards to gender preferences and nothing more.

Edited September 29, 2015 by LookAtThisPOst

[MoreAmore]

I

Also, learned of the word "pansexual", man...what will they come up with next? LOL Is that when you have an attraction to Peter Pan and take trips to Neverland?

 

Unless, of course, it's a "deep sexual connection' with someone of both genders, which would make her bi-sexual. I thought sexuality of sorts was in regards to gender preferences and nothing more.

 

Oh for the sake of all, pansexuality means you develop attraction to people regardless of where they fall on the gender spectrum. It was created to be specifically inclusive of trans verse cis gender and non gender-specifying. Some people feel that it is unecessary because they feel the historic label of bisexuality was never exclusive, but some feel it was and so express their sexuality with a specifically inclusive term.

 

Were you like this in school when learning new concepts and terminology?

Hey and now they're trying to tell me the word morose but we already have a word sad!!! Haha ridiculous people!!

 

This stuff isn't exactly rocket science to learn,nor is it harmful to anyone.

 

Who would rejoice and celebrate in their own enforced ignorance here? And why would anyone feel dictating the terminology and terms of another human beings sexuality?

[xxoo]

So it's just monogomy, not "Demisexual"

 

I mean, by that definition, even I could be considered demisexual, but I don't call myself that in the profile. Just "Straight"

 

Why even make up a name for it? It's confusing.

 

First there was Metrosexual, yet another faddish name...now they are coming out with these new faddish names.

 

Because a "straight" person and/or a "monogamous" person might still desire sex early on before an emotional attachment is formed.

 

Metrosexual has been added to dictionaries and is very much part of the English language at this point. New words are coined and added to the dictionary every year. It's really not that confusing for most people after the first time we learn what a new word means. Life long learning