impatiently_patient Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 ...in two of the biggest and most competitive markets (I'd imagine), NYC and LA. Charge up your WTF lasers. You're gonna need 'em: I was thinking about going back to online dating because I can't meet anyone in life that's the least bit interested in me, but now I don't even... *leaves room to make martini Link to post Share on other sites
sportygirl89 Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 I find it hard to believe you can't meet people in real life. Phoenix, AZ is one of the top 10 cities for singles. Are you even putting yourself out there? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 If you look at both of the people getting lots of dates they are not really achieving anything though are they? They are still on their own and still going through the motions. They think that just because they are having sex that it must be successful? Personally I don't think they are. I just think they are good at getting attention. What happens when you want to be in a long lasting and caring relationship? Swiping every person is not going to work then is it? I did note how the guy does tend to pay attention to the profiles both content, tone and the pictures before making his approach which is rarely just a Hi or a copy cut and paste job... 4 Link to post Share on other sites
LookAtThisPOst Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 If you look at both of the people getting lots of dates they are not really achieving anything though are they? They are still on their own and still going through the motions. They think that just because they are having sex that it must be successful? Personally I don't think they are. I just think they are good at getting attention. What happens when you want to be in a long lasting and caring relationship? Swiping every person is not going to work then is it? I did note how the guy does tend to pay attention to the profiles both content, tone and the pictures before making his approach which is rarely just a Hi or a copy cut and paste job... Right, I was watching the whole video, and the "coffee expert" (I mean, really? Coffee expert?, LOL!) Was bragging about who "2 days later, I got laid." The whole video was about landing dates and getting laid. The methods by which were offered, though valid, i.e. - providing more details in your profile and conversation starters. They are hooking people, but it's the dude is like "F-em, and chuck 'em". 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 They are hooking people, but it's the dude is like "F-em, and chuck 'em". Which is why the OK Cupid expert gave advice on how to attract a "match" not just a shag. What I find sad is that the girl is also a dating coach... What the hell is that about? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
LookAtThisPOst Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 Which is why the OK Cupid expert gave advice on how to attract a "match" not just a shag. What I find sad is that the girl is also a dating coach... What the hell is that about? LOL..yeah, I was like "WTF? How is she a dating coach?!" Link to post Share on other sites
ScienceGal Posted September 28, 2015 Share Posted September 28, 2015 So, the man is all about getting laid. Not sure about the women, as neither commented on it. The dating coach seemed to want a real match, but her story fell a little flat. They made the last woman's profile pic quite racy though, so yeah.. She's going to get more hits, but does that represent who she is? I guess if the point is # of messages and having sex, then bravo to them! Too superficial for me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author impatiently_patient Posted September 28, 2015 Author Share Posted September 28, 2015 I find it hard to believe you can't meet people in real life. Phoenix, AZ is one of the top 10 cities for singles. Are you even putting yourself out there? Yes... usually it's just myself through. Most of my friends are spoken for and/or don't want to do the things I enjoy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author impatiently_patient Posted September 28, 2015 Author Share Posted September 28, 2015 (edited) As for the OP: I guess I'm the only one who's a bit dumbfounded. Mind you it's all subjective but THESE are the two most popular Ok Cupid members? I mean, the woman is reasonably cute (not jaw dropping, though) and the guy... ummm... okay, I'm going to play the straight card here and prompt the peanut gallery: Is this guy what women get all hot and bothered over? Really?! I guess I'm just missing something. I was averaging less than one date a year from online dating... but I've had zero dates not from online dating in about eight years now. I don't mind the idea that it's superficial (attraction is a gate you've got to get through), but why aren't any women superficial for me? I guess If only I was sexy like that guy, LOL. Edited September 28, 2015 by impatiently_patient Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted September 29, 2015 Share Posted September 29, 2015 As for the OP: I guess I'm the only one who's a bit dumbfounded. Mind you it's all subjective but THESE are the two most popular Ok Cupid members? I mean, the woman is reasonably cute (not jaw dropping, though) and the guy... ummm... okay, I'm going to play the straight card here and prompt the peanut gallery: Is this guy what women get all hot and bothered over? Really?! I guess I'm just missing something. I was averaging less than one date a year from online dating... but I've had zero dates not from online dating in about eight years now. I don't mind the idea that it's superficial (attraction is a gate you've got to get through), but why aren't any women superficial for me? I guess If only I was sexy like that guy, LOL. Do us all a favour then. Get some sexy pictures done of yourself. yes Guys can have sexy photos too... That guys pictures were sexy. Get some help with it. Do what he did with his profile and just click yes to everyone regardless of what they look like. When you send messages take his advice and read their profiles and try to tailor your message to it... then let us all know how you got on. Link to post Share on other sites
Author impatiently_patient Posted September 29, 2015 Author Share Posted September 29, 2015 (edited) Do us all a favour then. Get some sexy pictures done of yourself. yes Guys can have sexy photos too... That guys pictures were sexy. Get some help with it. Do what he did with his profile and just click yes to everyone regardless of what they look like. When you send messages take his advice and read their profiles and try to tailor your message to it... then let us all know how you got on. Do what exactly? I'm schit with a camera. I've asked for photo advice before but never got any clarity on what the eff an attractive pic entails. All that said, my pics aren't bad. And if that dude's pictures are "sexy", he's seriously misrepresenting himself. Dude's not doing any modeling work any time soon. Edited September 29, 2015 by impatiently_patient Link to post Share on other sites
Author impatiently_patient Posted October 1, 2015 Author Share Posted October 1, 2015 Well, let's hear it, experts. Link to post Share on other sites
Nikki Sahagin Posted October 1, 2015 Share Posted October 1, 2015 Personally I don't think either of them are that special. I don't see why they are both so popular online (?) Link to post Share on other sites
Mggreen Posted October 3, 2015 Share Posted October 3, 2015 I honestly don't see what your problem is. These people just work with what they have. It's almost inspiring as neither of them are knockouts. You're right. That guy isn't spectacular but his photos are great, and he focuses on the importance of relatability. His profile seems to contain something that most girls can relate to. Figure out how to take better photos. Read profiles and connect with people. That's what we're all looking for - a connection. Link to post Share on other sites
Noproblem Posted October 3, 2015 Share Posted October 3, 2015 The guy disgusts and he is not even handsome, his photos are mostly altered with a lot effects to let him look cool.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author impatiently_patient Posted October 3, 2015 Author Share Posted October 3, 2015 Figure out how to take better photos. Read profiles and connect with people. That's what we're all looking for - a connection. How are his photos great? Link to post Share on other sites
Mggreen Posted October 3, 2015 Share Posted October 3, 2015 How are his photos great? They just are. He is not a great looking guy, but I gave his photos a double take. I'm not saying you should emulate him - don't. Just take flattering photos. Find your good side. Don't give up or lose hope because of game players. Link to post Share on other sites
Author impatiently_patient Posted October 4, 2015 Author Share Posted October 4, 2015 They just are. He is not a great looking guy, but I gave his photos a double take. I'm not saying you should emulate him - don't. Just take flattering photos. Find your good side. Don't give up or lose hope because of game players. "They just are." is about as explanatory as Donald Trump's foreign policy solutions. What. Is. He. Doing. Link to post Share on other sites
thecrucible Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 How are his photos great? They were interesting, showed a variety of poses and different angles. The stylised flirty photos always seem to win more. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
bluefeather Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 lol... this is some weird ****. I think AOL had it better when they first came out with chat rooms and IMs. I think people should go in and chat and chat and chat about whatever they want, and they should also have profiles with pics, bio, etc... That way people can get to know eachother a lot better and in real time. If OkCupid or some dating site implemented this, people might have better luck finding mates or at least have some actual communication besides a few "hey you're cute" messages. Toodaloo, you made such a good point. These top members are not even finding love. Dating expert, huh? Maybe she should change her title to expert of getting first dates... Link to post Share on other sites
Frank2thepoint Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Oh geez. I stopped the video a few times at the right moments, and read the three people's profiles. The dude is in NYC with me, and he's just banging chicks. That's all he cares about. If you pause at 1:27, you'll get to read the douchebag's profile. The first sentence in his profile says "I want a girlfriend and am tired of meeting so many women just want sex or to bitch about their x-boyfriend who they can't get over." 20 seconds later he is bragging about how he tripled the amount of sex he is having. He is misleading the women, but I can honestly say that most single women in NYC just only want to have sex anyway. But I will say what he is doing is working for him. He is correct about coming out swinging with your profile. You have to stand out, say something exciting or thought provoking. Also he is using some black-and-white pictures of himself. I read somewhere that that tactic works for men. It emphasizes the hard edges of man's face for example. The Asian woman has a good profile. Her personality shows through in the first few lines I saw. Her profile is seen at 1:28. She likes R. Kelly, and umami burger (whatever that is). So an aware guy can latch on to those two things and start something. But since she is an attractive woman, in LA, receiving 700 messages per week from men, and at 28 doesn't really know what she is looking for, she's only getting guys that want to have sex with her. She needs to figure out what she wants, otherwise she'll be floating through the dating world, lost in the sauce. As for the last woman, the tall blonde in NYC, it's sad they had to do a makeover of her profile. She wasn't getting any attention because she was - maybe still is - bitter, and didn't have anything inviting. In the makeover profile, she is presenting herself too much sexually. The main profile pic is her in sexy black lingerie, lying on her back, ready for sex. That's the message it's sending. Also, her description is a bit confusing to me. Second sentence says "I'm looking for a wonderful partner, but I prefer being single over settling (I've been married, and I'm open to it again but not unless it's right)." So what is she looking for? A partner? No one? Marriage? Maybe anything? For an editor, she needs to work on being direct with her message and figuring out what she wants. If I read that on a dating website, I would pass her over for that. Also, she is not skinny. She is average shaped with some meat. She is lying more to herself than to her audience. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
lino Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Watching that makes me so glad I never used online dating. It epitomizes everything that is wrong with dating today. Average Women who have the pickiness of a supermodel. Serial dating as if it's a hobby rather than a way to genuinely meet someone. Absolute tool of a guy who is mid 30s but acts like a 20 year old. Thank God I found the girl I did, when I did. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
lino Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 "They just are." is about as explanatory as Donald Trump's foreign policy solutions. What. Is. He. Doing. They just use the cheesy filters of one of those photo apps so I guess it helps the masses of people who follow the vapid pop culture of today relate more. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
bluefeather Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Watching that makes me so glad I never used online dating. It epitomizes everything that is wrong with dating today. Average Women who have the pickiness of a supermodel. Serial dating as if it's a hobby rather than a way to genuinely meet someone. Absolute tool of a guy who is mid 30s but acts like a 20 year old. Thank God I found the girl I did, when I did. Hey, I agree with everything you said, but please don't tease those of us who are single! Link to post Share on other sites
Author impatiently_patient Posted October 4, 2015 Author Share Posted October 4, 2015 (edited) If you pause at 1:27, you'll get to read the douchebag's profile. The first sentence in his profile says "I want a girlfriend and am tired of meeting so many women just want sex or to bitch about their x-boyfriend who they can't get over." Quite the writer, isn't he? They just use the cheesy filters of one of those photo apps so I guess it helps the masses of people who follow the vapid pop culture of today relate more. So, pictures at different angles, and hipstergram filters. Wow. Women are apparently easy to impress. Here I was about to buy a 4/3rds with low f-stop capabilities. Just saved me a bundle. Edited October 4, 2015 by impatiently_patient 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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