singme2sleep Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 I thought when I woke up the pain would be gone. I feel so sick. I feel the same feeling I did when he first broke my heart. The girl is really beatiful. She's half Asian. I always knew he had a thing for them (I'm not Asian.) she goes to school. She has a ton of hobbies. I didn't think he would actually find someone that's better than me. She exceeds me. I think we even have the same career goal. I feel sick to my stomach right now. I knew this day would come but I had no idea he would ever find a girl like that who's out of his league. I'm in awe She is not better than you. You should if anything feel sorry for her because he'll likely do the same to her. Chin up, if you can survive getting your heart ripped out (just like me) then you'll be much stronger in the future and able to get through anything. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
dyna85 Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 I would want to date someone and be with someone who is more like myself and is more considerate of other peoples feelings. Someone who is spiritual and emotional like I am. Exactly. Now you're talkin'... And singme2sleep is right on point. You should feel bad for this new girl because she doesn't know the real person your ex is. Do you think any girl would want to be around someone who treated their ex the way your ex treated you? People don't change. Your ex is still the guy who ignored his ex 2x...2 heartfelt messages desperate for closure, ignored. And you were someone with whom he was supposedly close and loved. If she knew his true colors, she'd surely run for the hills. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author freebird31 Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 Exactly. Now you're talkin'... And singme2sleep is right on point. You should feel bad for this new girl because she doesn't know the real person your ex is. Do you think any girl would want to be around someone who treated their ex the way your ex treated you? People don't change. Your ex is still the guy who ignored his ex 2x...2 heartfelt messages desperate for closure, ignored. And you were someone with whom he was supposedly close and loved. If she knew his true colors, she'd surely run for the hills. I never really looked at it that way. It makes me feel glad that I'm not associated with someone like that. I'm not saying he is a bad person but he's a really inconsiderate one. That's true I do feel kind of bad for her. Who knows maybe he'll treat her differently. But I'm glad I didn't settle for him. I mean, I'm glad the situation forced me to move on from him. I am a really emotional person and my ex is someone who doesn't like dealing with things. At some point it wouldn't have worked out. There's someone better out there who is more suited for me I feel. Especially after meeting the last guy I dated. I know there's better people out there Link to post Share on other sites
Author freebird31 Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 My social media apps still remain deleted by the way. I think I'm going to take a long break from them. I don't think I have it in me to download the app right now. I need a good long break from all of that. Link to post Share on other sites
Author freebird31 Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 We associate death with the end. We tend to feel that if someone is dead then all the emotions tied to them die too but this isn't reality. The hatred, love, grief, regret, longing still exist in us after the person dies. Instead of hoping for their death and the hoped for relief, work through the pain. Numbing it only makes it worse when you finally feel it. It's like the dust bunnies you shove under the couch. You know they're there, it stresses you out to think about having to clean it one day, you wish it was just gone but don't want to walk alllll the way over to get the vacuum. Then you get fed up, clean it up, feel relieved and then wonder why you spent so much time stressing about it when you could have just dealt with it a long time ago. As the Rolling Stones said, "You can't always get what you want, but if you try sometimes you might well find you get what you need." Maybe what you need is to reframe your thinking. Every person you meet has something to teach you if you're able to find it. I see a few things to take away from what happened and I'm sure you'll find more. Don't worry about things you can't change. There's nothing that can be done about what's already happened so take the lesson and move forward. Find someone better to sleep with, up your standards, teach your future children, etc. This is the biggest gift he gave you. Your ex set you free and now you're aware enough to find the man who will be everything you want. Your ex has shown you in glaring detail everything you don't want to settle for. Absolutely. The next time it'll be with someone better thanks to your awareness of how your ex's shortcomings affected you. Thanks. Once again I never really looked at things that way. My ex did give me some kind of gift didn't he? Even if it comes with pain. With the distance and space and all of these things that happened, I can say that there's definitely something better out there. and I like that quote haha. I don't think he was anything I needed just everything I really wanted. Link to post Share on other sites
chapter44 Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Freebird: I don't know if this will offer any comfort or not but rest assured most of us on here have had our heart broken at one time or another, its one of life's inevitable truths. We've compared ourselves to the other person, fantasized about how happy they are, projected far into the future about our exes idyllic life and became our own worst enemies. The simple fact of the matter is that all of us here have survived and many of us are thriving and more happy than we have ever been. When we are in the middle of our own despair it's hard to see but I promise in the near future you will look back on this time and wonder why you let someone affect you in such a way. Take the proven advice that others have given and know that you will be happy again and this guy will be nothing more than a distant memory. Link to post Share on other sites
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