Stage5Clinger Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 I bet you experience worries, fears and stresses dont you? I bet you have two eyes and two ears. Therefor I'm right and you are wrong. What the hell are you trying to sell dude. You're not exactly a master of the profession. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrGray25 Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 I think some of the most precious and saddest things is when two people are close and grow old and one has to say goodbye to the other. In healthy relationships, the companionship is vital as an elderly. Think about that. Old and very alone, and very alone in death. You're already alone. Until you accept this you will keep bumping into life over and over and over and.... Link to post Share on other sites
neowulf Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 You can experience intimacy without attachment. If you believe there is something beyond that, I've got some REALLY bad news for you, it's a lie. You're searching for something outside of you that doesn't exist. This is another robotic response from an attached human: "there's something you're missing out on". Attachment is blind. It's not the attachment that's bothering you. It's the fear and pain of letting *go* of that attachment once the time comes. Avoiding attachment is a act of fear. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 You're still looking for something outside of you that doesn't exist. Every day is easy and delightful when you give up relationships. I bet you experience worries, fears and stresses dont you? Another incorrect assumption. No I don't. To the contrary, since meeting my fiancé five years ago...my stress level and anxiety has gone DOWN! I was a wreck before him.... on meds the whole nine yards. Since him, I feel at peace.... a calm. I posted this in another thread, but my RL has not caused me one iota of anxiety....and that is the 100% truth. I am sorry YOUR relationships caused you anxiety, pain, and other negative feelings. Like I said, when you meet the right person.... perhaps you will experience what I am experiencing, and change your tune. I hope so..... good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrGray25 Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 So is everything else hard work in life, getting an education, working, staying healthy, saving money, etc. Name me one thing in life that is easy and doesn't require hard work? Why would relationships be exempt of requiring hard work? Life is easy, it isn't hard. Link to post Share on other sites
Celeste.Carol Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 You're already alone. Until you accept this you will keep bumping into life over and over and over and.... I believe others need the companionship esp. in trying times and death. I do not necessarily because I am easily able to amuse myself and keep my own interests with keen detail and attention. I tend to tune out and go within myself. But I know for a fact others need deep companionship in their life to feel fulfilled. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrGray25 Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 No longer required in modern society!? Well if you think that then there would be absolute chaos. It would be anarchy. You come up with a better system. What you describe about committed relationships, sex, companionship, love and having children is society. We built it and with out it we would have a modern society. Think about it. People like to be in a stable relationship to have a family, children. Sex, reproduction and human companionship is whats need for us to survive. to live. With out any of this we are less than human. We`d may as well be nothing but an animal. You think about that for a second. In your life OP, you dont need a committed relationship, you dont need sex, you dont need companionship and LOVE in your life or children. You, my friend are going to live a lonesome life till you`re 74 years old and have over 160 cats in your house. No longer relevant. Link to post Share on other sites
Stage5Clinger Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Life is easy, it isn't hard. Says the guy who thinks relationships are impossible to achieve. Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 You're still looking for something outside of you that doesn't exist. Every day is easy and delightful when you give up relationships. I bet you experience worries, fears and stresses dont you? Every day NOW is easy and delightful dude.....:bunny: 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrGray25 Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 It's not the attachment that's bothering you. It's the fear and pain of letting *go* of that attachment once the time comes. Avoiding attachment is a act of fear. No its accepting reality Committed relationships dont exist reality. Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Life is easy, it isn't hard. If everything came easy to you and you never had make any efforts to obtain something then no wonder you're horrified at the fact relationship require work. You're right, it's better for you to not be in a relationship then. It won't work for you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
neowulf Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 If love were a real thing. Attachment kills it every time, 100% of the time. Oh, I can assure you it most certainly that love *is* a very real thing. Attachment isn't the issue. It's how people *process* that attachment that causes problems. People fear the attachment, so it causes them to try and control. They fear the pain of loss, so it forces them to detach. It's not attachment. It's the way people process loss that causes the problem. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
neowulf Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 No its accepting reality Committed relationships dont exist reality. Hmm. That's odd. I've seen hundreds of examples of committed relationships that lasted a lifetime. It seems like your "reality" and my "reality" are out of sync. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Oh, I can assure you it most certainly that love *is* a very real thing. Attachment isn't the issue. It's how people *process* that attachment that causes problems. People fear the attachment, so it causes them to try and control. They fear the pain of loss, so it forces them to detach. It's not attachment. It's the way people process loss that causes the problem. ^^This. Even said THAT in my other post too. That if, god forbid, our RL ended, we would BOTH be fine...because we are both strong, independent people. OP, you sound hurt, like maybe you were just dumped (like Gaeta said earlier) and this is your defense mechanism to prevent your falling into the depth of depression or something over the loss. Why don't you tell us about the break up and how HURT (and angry) you are. THAT would be more productive than you spewing this garbage which makes ZERO sense. Link to post Share on other sites
Stage5Clinger Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 No its accepting reality Committed relationships dont exist reality. laugh out loud Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrGray25 Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 Another incorrect assumption. No I don't. To the contrary, since meeting my fiancé five years ago...my stress level and anxiety has gone DOWN! I was a wreck before him.... on meds the whole nine yards. Since him, I feel at peace.... a calm. I posted this in another thread, but my RL has not caused me one iota of anxiety....and that is the 100% truth. I am sorry YOUR relationships caused you anxiety, pain, and other negative feelings. Like I said, when you meet the right person.... perhaps you will experience what I am experiencing, and change your tune. I hope so..... good luck. He is your happiness. You experience fear and anxiety of losing him. One day in the future when you two are no longer together you will have to face this attachment that doesn't exist and it will be VERY painful. I know you don't want to believe it but it's going to happen. I understand the human condition so well I can predict your future because all humans work the same way. Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrGray25 Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 Says the guy who thinks relationships are impossible to achieve. because committed relationships dont exist. How can you achieve what doesn't exist? Link to post Share on other sites
Mendalore Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 I'd like to make a few points.... 1) Don't feed the troll 2) The point made is somewhat valid. Observe the happiness had by those in polyamorous relationships, fluidic state, and other non-traditional family units. The idea that one can commune with all other beings on earth on the same level, transcending sexual, gender, and societal labels and roles is a beautiful one, but... 3) Humans aren't quite ready for that yet and I don't think they will be for a few more generations if even that soon and to think otherwise is incredibly...I hate to use the word optimistic, but I guess it fits. In the meantime... 4) Some people have different views and, as a result, are in control of their own lives. Some people want what you want; others want a committed relationship; still others want something in between with polyamory and committed relationships with multiple people. Let people do what they want because... 5) As long as something is wanted, desired, striven toward, and not harmful to anyone, it's not "useless" in modern society. My two cents. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author MrGray25 Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 Every day NOW is easy and delightful dude.....:bunny: If you're attached to anything then you suffer. Link to post Share on other sites
Stage5Clinger Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 He is your happiness. You experience fear and anxiety of losing him. One day in the future when you two are no longer together you will have to face this attachment that doesn't exist and it will be VERY painful. I know you don't want to believe it but it's going to happen. I understand the human condition so well I can predict your future because all humans work the same way. This dude is hilarious. Yes, let's abolish love and fear loss. I love when someone picks up the Dhammapada and acts like they've been a monk all their life. Also, big laughs on "the human condition" and "I can predict your future". Top notch comedy bro. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
neowulf Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 He is your happiness. You experience fear and anxiety of losing him. One day in the future when you two are no longer together you will have to face this attachment that doesn't exist and it will be VERY painful. I know you don't want to believe it but it's going to happen. I understand the human condition so well I can predict your future because all humans work the same way. Yes, she will hurt when the relationship ends. She will grieve. That is all *part* of the human condition. Avoiding the pain, running from the things that scare us, is what lessens us. Does the fact that one day in the future she will experience pain, lessen all the days of joy and happiness that came before? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
katiegrl Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 He is your happiness. You experience fear and anxiety of losing him. One day in the future when you two are no longer together you will have to face this attachment that doesn't exist and it will be VERY painful. I know you don't want to believe it but it's going to happen. I understand the human condition so well I can predict your future because all humans work the same way. Dude, will you stop assuming to know what I am feeling? How freakin arrogant, sheesh! LOL I invite you to read my last post before this. I feel no anxiety over losing him. None, nada, zip! AS I SAID, I would be okay if it ended....because I am, always was, and always WILL BE a strong, independent woman. Would I be sad? Of course! Would I miss him? Of course? Would I fall to pieces like my whole world just ended? NO!! Is any of this sinking in? Link to post Share on other sites
Celeste.Carol Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 He is your happiness. You experience fear and anxiety of losing him. One day in the future when you two are no longer together you will have to face this attachment that doesn't exist and it will be VERY painful. I know you don't want to believe it but it's going to happen. I understand the human condition so well I can predict your future because all humans work the same way. Not having to do with Katie, but please Mr. Gray, explain those who are addicted to pain, where do they fit into your pyramid scheme? Link to post Share on other sites
Stage5Clinger Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 If you're attached to anything then you suffer. "If you're afraid of suffering, you're a little pussy." -The Dalai Lama 2 Link to post Share on other sites
xxoo Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Committed relationships, sex, companionship, love and having children are no longer necessary in our modern society, its really that simple. Wine and chocolate aren't necessary in modern society, either, but they sure are enjoyable. As are love, sex, companionship, and family To love is to suffer. This is inevitable. But it is also fully living. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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