Slashed and stabbed while sleeping

[Craig]

Thank you tinktronik for telling us all about your experience. I think the more that people can read different peoples experiences the better it can be for everyone.

[tinktronik]

I think many, not all of course, female abusers attack their man because he did things that were very hurtful to her, like cheating or verbal abuse or as self defense if they were being beaten up. The staffers know this which is why they might have little pitty for their clients, but whose heart wouldn't go out to a man who was stabbed in his sleep?

 

For each male victim, I can't help but imagine first what he put his wife or girlfriend through and if he admits to others that he was a mean cheating person who drove his wife nuts until she physicall fought back. I know this isn't the case for all, including you Craig from what you have shared but it might help to explain why the 99% female staffers act the way you describe. Curly, I don't think it is a question of discrimination.

 

Whereas men beat because they are strong and want to put their woman in check or are ridiculously jealous for no reason or beat for minor issues, or because they are drunk or high or crazy, it takes A LOT more for a woman, who are more patient and put up with more and are 99% less physical and strong, to reach the point of losing it and I feel sorry for those women and can only imagine what hell they have been put through.

 

I can't believe no one has responded to this before. This is wrong, humans are humans and voilence is violence.It dosent take anymore for a woman to hit a man than it does for a man to hit a woman. A lack of self control and muscle control.It dosent matter if someone cheats of verbally abuses, leave dont hit another person , are you kidding. Even if a woman is smaller than the person she is attacking , humans are flesh and a whole person can do a lot of dammage to that flesh no matter the size.

[lovestobesexed]

I know first hand what its like to live with a physo.

I lived with a man for 8 years who constantly beat me up. Why did I stay with him, well because each time I tried to leave he would go over to my sisters house and hurt her and her husband and kids. Her husband was blind and could not help them.

 

This is the only reason that I stayed. The police could only help so much. They did the best that they could.

 

Finally my sister moved to another province and I left him. For years he harassed and hounded me, I cant count how many times I moved and how many jobs I had to leave to get rid of him. I too wanted to move to another province but my parents lived close by and I needed to stay near home with family.

 

This man set my house on fire with me in it, he stabbed me repeatedly with a screwdriver, choked me, and kicked me out of my car on a deserted road in -45 below weather I almost froze to death. Lost the feeling in my feet and hands, almost had to have them amputated. But thank god I was found lying on the ground by a man, who is still my best friend. He saved my life. I am grateful for him.

 

After I recovered the abuse again started and worse yet.

 

Finally out of desperation, I did criminal acts to get caught and when I did, I went to court and demanded that I be sent to jail because I could not live my life like I was. I wanted to be protected and feel safe. I explained this to the judge and he cried when I told him my story. All charges were dropped and he sent me to a womens shelter for two months and I underwent extensive counselling. This helped me so much.

 

As for my abuser, he stopped abusing me, and harassing me when he died of a drug overdose in 2004, even though I had left him for good in 1994. He would not leave me alone. The police could not watch him day and night and I had a restraining order against him, it did not matter to him. He always found me, no matter where I worked and lived.

 

I dont wish the abuser or anyone bad things but for once in my life, I can now go where I want and not be afraid. Until you have been in an abusive relationship you have no idea what it is like.

 

I praise and commend anyone who has had the strength and courage to leave their abusive relationships.

[Craig]

lovetobesexed, I am truly sorry that you endured what you did. Clearly the police were not doing what they should have and could have done. Criminal Harassment in Canada carries a maximum term of 14 years and your ex sounds like he was a perfect poster child for the maximum. The cops could have done something, that's one reason why I have no respect, zero, for the cops. I don't trust them and never will they're just a gang and they have their own rules, own code of conduct and own colors.

 

I am very happy that you can now start to begin to get your life back again and also thankful that you lucked out in getting the right judge on the right day. It's a hard road and only those that have been there have any idea what it's like.

 

Best wishes,

 

Craig

[lovestobesexed]

Thanks for the kind words Craig.

For many years, I was scared to tell anyone what was happening to me. I was ashamed. This is an issue that no one wanted to talk about. It was all hush hush. I was blind for so many years, and now I am not.

Counselling helps, trust me on that. I think I went to counselling for three years. I always blamed myself.

If supper was late, I got beat up. I tried to be the best, but I could not do it.

I could not live up to someones so high expecatations.

 

Thanks for telling us your story.

Take care and lets keep in touch friend.

[Craig]

Thanks for the kind words Craig.

For many years, I was scared to tell anyone what was happening to me. I was ashamed. This is an issue that no one wanted to talk about. It was all hush hush. I was blind for so many years, and now I am not.

Counselling helps, trust me on that. I think I went to counselling for three years. I always blamed myself.

It's an issue that is becoming more and more ok to talk about and globally at that (looking at rates of increase in incidents reported.) People who aren't in these situations don't realize the fear and shame that survivor/victims have regarding telling their story. Thank you for sharing, I'll be here on LS for a while.