not much time....help

[michelle_so]

i need some serious advice, quick! I have a manager at work who is quitting in a few days. The main problem is that, I have very serious feelings for him...we chat online sometimes and when we work together he sends all the right signals that he's interested in me too. I want to know how I tell him how I feel...without sounding desperate...It would be easy, but he's got a girlfriend. He talks to me whenever he can...but we have to keep it like hidden. If he's at home, he has to hurry and get off the computer if she comes home...etc. I really don't want to lose this guy. He's so amazing. I know that it can't be real serious when he chooses to talk to me about things and not her. I want to tell him before he leaves. I think he has some ideas on how i feel, but I don't know if he knows how strong my feelings really are. Please help me...what do i do?

[Alyssa]

OK, you "dont' want to lose this guy". Well...you may not want to hear this, but...he isn't yours to lose. You two are not dating, and he is seeing someone else. You want to have a relationship with a guy who has a girlfriend? You'd be happy sneaking around to see him? If he finally broke it off with her, would you be happy having a relationship with someone who cheats?

 

Just because you have feelings does not mean you have to ACT on them. That's a part of being an adult is not acting on every impulse...knowing when it's best *not* to act. Show some maturity and let this guy go. Find someone who is not seeing someone else and who will not cheat!

 

Again, I know it's not what you wanted to hear. I hope things turn out well whatever you decide to do.

i need some serious advice, quick! I have a manager at work who is quitting in a few days. The main problem is that, I have very serious feelings for him...we chat online sometimes and when we work together he sends all the right signals that he's interested in me too. I want to know how I tell him how I feel...without sounding desperate...It would be easy, but he's got a girlfriend. He talks to me whenever he can...but we have to keep it like hidden. If he's at home, he has to hurry and get off the computer if she comes home...etc. I really don't want to lose this guy. He's so amazing. I know that it can't be real serious when he chooses to talk to me about things and not her. I want to tell him before he leaves. I think he has some ideas on how i feel, but I don't know if he knows how strong my feelings really are. Please help me...what do i do?

[Ms Understood]

Invite him out for a leaving drink as freinds, keep chatting on line but keep your mitts off him! You have no concrete basis for saying he feels the same so really you are just in the middle of a serious crush. Just be freinds with him, get to know him and see what happenes. Maybe he is serious with this other girl or maybe it is just a fling. Either way, he is not yours and may never be and you could be good freinds. Just don't let your feelings get in the way.