Thinkalot Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 I am experiencing such a mix of feelings since coming home from our wonderful wedding, it's a bit like the normal post-holiday blues, only magnified. After our wedding in Fiji, the enormous build-up and expectations, the honeymoon etc... Being back at work, and in routine is kinda tough. I know, I know..not a bad problem to have, but I thought maybe others, who have been where I am now, might be able to relate to how I am feeling. It's a funny mix. Partly I am so happy to be married and ready to move into the rest of our lives, and still excited when I look at the photos etc,and chat with people. The other part is sad and flat that it is all done. I've spoken to others, who are married, who have assured me they felt exactly the same way. So I guess it's normal. Also, because of my tendency to obsess (I have OCD) and get stuck on things, I have found myself worrying about silly things. Like the fact that we were not a perfect picture of lovesick romance our entire honeymoon. We had a fantastic holiday, and enjoyed our time together. After nearly 4 years together though, we did not suddenly transform into a couple of lovesick puppies, gazing at each other adoringly, like those couples you see in brochures advertising honeymoon destinations. Sure, we did that sometimes, but other times, we argued about stuff, just like we normally would! Somehow that did not fit into the unrealistic Thinkalot Box of Fairyland Expectations. lol Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 Throw away the ruler, Thinkalot. Comparing yourself with others (or, worse, with your own idealized imaginings) is a surefire recipe for disappointment. By definition, the period after any excitement is anticlimactic. Like poking the sore spot on your arm or continually thinking about your headache, concentrating on it only makes it worse. I think you need to get involved in something that you can occupy your idle time thoughts with - maybe some sort of volunteer work. Something with so much activity and so many problems to solve that you don't have idle time to ponder stuff like this. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thinkalot Posted May 22, 2005 Author Share Posted May 22, 2005 lol merry, you're right Link to post Share on other sites
meanon Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 Thinkalot, I was struck by the lovesick expression on one of your wedding pics. You know the one? Copy it, put it on your fridge, your screensaver at work. Your relationship will always be more volatile than some, it makes no sense to expect it to change. You love each other, that's what matters to you two. Physical activity often seems to help when you find it hard to keep the worries at bay. Time to hit the surf Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 Thinkalot, you don't need to have OCD in order to worry about such things. Moreover people worry about really minor things. This is not minor, it's just life. Life isn't a honeymoon. You know that. Have you ever been 100% happy? I mean really happy, not talking about joy or euphoria. No! Nobody is 100% happy. We can measure our happiness with moments or days, but never with years. We should try and make the percentage of happiness as higher as possible, but don't expect that you will never argue or that the couples from the movies exist in reality. Try to break the routine in order to prevent the monotony, but don't think a lot! Remember to tell me all this when I get married soon. I guess I will need to hear it from someone else's mouth. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Thinkalot Posted May 22, 2005 Author Share Posted May 22, 2005 Thank you oh wise Lshackers! It does help hearing what you know to be true from someone else! Link to post Share on other sites
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