Why doesn't he want me back?

[Moo20]

Hello.

A brief overview. We dated for like 2-3 months and then he started to lose interest in me and he started drifting away without even telling me that he was done. I had to ask him if he was done with me and for closure, for which I didn't get an appropriate reply. He was all I'm not sure, I need time. I didn't stick around cause I felt like I was being played with and cut off all contact. It's been 5 months now, we meet each other (same college) and we're finally civil to one another. But I just can't help wonder why doesn't he want me back? Like why isn't he even trying to sort the issue out. Instead he acts all like it's my fault and avoids me.

They say at some point people do come back and I've seen all my friends exes ask them for another chance, but somehow this doesn't happen with me. It's really upsetting as I have to see him everyday and try to maintain my cool. I kinda wish he'd ask me for another chance or at least apologize. Sorry for the long post.

[CalvinM]

Why would you want him back?

[bathtub-row]

The two of you didn't date for very long, so this is probably not one of those situations where getting back together is going to happen. And I agree with the other poster, why would you want him back?

 

Hey, if a guy loses interest that quickly, let him go. There's something seriously incompatible about the two of you. Don't waste your time trying to figure it out. Trying to hang onto this, or longing for closure, is not going to serve you. Hanging on just says that you're unwilling to accept the choice he made. But he did make a choice, for whatever reason. The truth is, a lot of guys in college don't want to get tied down to someone and it may be as simple as that. Or he may have cheated on you and didn't want to deal with the complications of that.

 

For whatever reason he did what he did, this is a guy who can't be upfront with you and that's a very big problem. In other words, he's not bf material. Instead of letting it eat at you, consider that you may have dodged a bullet, be happy, get on with your life and forget about him.

[ExpatInItaly]

First of all, not all exes come back. That simply isn't true. And as someone else mentioned, this relationship wasn't very long and so there wasn't much of a relationship to miss, you know? The likelihood of him coming back isn't all that strong. I don't mean to hurt you, but that's more or less the reality. I've dated a few guys who left and never returned. And vice versa. You need to stop telling yourself that you're the only one this hasn't happened to - take a look at thousands of different threads on this forum to see that you're not alone there!

 

Secondly, why would you want him back? He lost interest and didn't really even let you know it wasn't working for him. That's not someone who is an ideal candidate for a boyfriend. He's avoiding you because he knows it hurt you and he doesn't want to deal with that.

 

Don't worry about why he lost interest. It won't help you; in fact, the truth could hurt more if there's more to the story than he let on. Unforunately, this is the downside of dating. We don't always stay with the people we like and we don't always get the closure and apologies we seek. The only thing we can do is accept the fact that it wasn't a match and start a new chapter.