OM here need tips approach

[AShyguy]

Hey! I could really need some advice on my situation, as i find it really hard. I am 19 yr old OM, the girl i am seeing (also 19) is in a relationship with a guy, and they live together (however she does not have any legal obligations, no rent etc, only stays there). Thats the facts. Now over to my story:

 

I met her 6 months ago, first as friend. It started getting romantically about 3 months ago, and at this point her BF was ignoring her a lot (playing videogames all day). So we starting talking a lot over the internet, and things got serious. I was just about to decide where to study, and i picked a place close to where she lives so we could see eachother (I had other reasons for this as well study ofc). So at this point, she told me that after we met, she would make her decission. However, right before I moved, her BF discovered one of our text logs (a very sexual one), and ofc got upset. So he decided to quit playing video games, and became very overprotective.

 

She still wanted to meet, and everything was still according to plan. So we met, had a great time, and it ended with sex. We met again a couple days later, and had a really great day together. As she was going home, she texted me, and had come to the conclusion that she was leaving her BF. I was obviously very happy, but at the same time knew this was hard for her. She told me that she planned on doing it by next week. However, her BF started becoming really nice to her, and she didn't have the heart to break up. She continued telling me she still wanted to break up, but that she needed time. About 1 month after meeting however, she told me she wasn't sure anymore. She had such a good time with both, but she continued telling me she didnt love him, and that she had stronger romantic feeling for me.

 

Then, once again, her BF managed to read her fb chat. He saw that she was still romantically involved with me. He forgave her once again, but forced her to send me a text telling me its over. She later called me, and told me that wasn't her, and that she didn't want it to be over. Now 1 month has passed, and i've kept the conversation almost entirely off the table (she gets really upset when i bring it up, and annoyed). We have met up many times, had a great time, sexual encounters etc.

 

Now i am so confused tho, what she wants. We basically talk everyday on skype, when her BF goes to bed. Usually from about 24:00 to 03:30 ish. At this point, we always have a great time, and she seems into me. She shows interest in my family, and what they will think of her etc. Talks with my brother and so on. Also she loves when i tell her stories about my thoughts and feelings around her past meetups, and my thoughts on our future. This seems like a positive thing for me, right?

 

The problem is the time she spends with her BF. I feel so completely ignored, and left out. She rarely texts me, or sends me messages, only when she is at the toilet. She just sits and watches TV with him. I understand she has to keep it a secret to some sorts (even though she tells him we are friends, and that we do have contact). But like, anytime her BF wants to do something, it seems like i am being ditched. She doesn't seem to stand up for herself.

 

For the last week (maybe two) she has only talked to me when he is at work (if i quit early in school), and when he goes to sleep. Before, she usually got on a couple hours prior to him going to sleep. However this caused some conflicts, as he felt like he had to compete for her time, and that she didnt want to spend time with him. So im not why she spends more time with him now, to avoid conflicts, or because she prefers it over my company..

 

She also says she is insecure if i am really inlove with her, and that I might find someone better. Im not sure if this also affects whether or not to leave her BF tho.

 

 

Now i don't know if she will ever have the guts to break up with him (or if she wants too). She has never broken up with anyone. Even her last BF, who cheated on her multiple times, she sticked to until he dumped her. So i don't know if she got it in her.

 

What should i do? Should i go NC? Is 3 months a long time for these kinds of things? So far i've been monitoring my phone like a hawk, always instantly answering, staying available for her anytime she can talk. I can't stand the idea of not being with her tho, i've truely fallen entirely in love with her.

Edited September 29, 2015 by AShyguy

[Eagle's-bargain]

What should i do? Should i go NC? Is 3 months a long time for these kinds of things? So far i've been monitoring my phone like a hawk, always instantly answering, staying available for her anytime she can talk. I can't stand the idea of not being with her tho, i've truely fallen entirely in love with her.

 

What should you do?

My opinion

 

Get out. Get out of this situation now. Close your facebook. Skype, whatever. For two months or make a new one. Don't answer anything.

Do your best to avoid her. If she's willing to do this with you, she is willing to do it with others. You're single, and appreciating her attention.

 

It is better to be alone than to be in an affair that will go nowhere.

 

If you really want to be with her, tell her BF how you feel. Warn her first.

Edited September 29, 2015 by Eagle's-bargain

[AShyguy]

What should you do?

My opinion

 

Get out. Get out of this situation now. Close your facebook. Skype, whatever. For two months or make a new one. Don't answer anything.

Do your best to avoid her. If she's willing to do this with you, she is willing to do it with others. You're single, and appreciating her attention.

 

It is better to be alone than to be in an affair that will go nowhere.

 

If you really want to be with her, tell her BF how you feel. Warn her first.

 

I get your point. But its hard, i believe ive truely fallen deeply in love. And i know i am more than just some guy to her, ive met her mother (as a friend ofc), and ive gained her trust. She even shared her fb with me, which is a big deal as a 19 yo. She has also said I love you, but she seems to have taken it back. She weights those words highly, and i can understand she doesnt love me (yet?). Also while skyping yday, i went away for 20mins without my phone, ignoring her. She freaked out, and eventually waked the friend i live with to come get me. Doesnt that say something?.idk. Im not gonna lie, i want NC in hopes she wlll come running..

[Eagle's-bargain]

I get your point. But its hard, i believe ive truely fallen deeply in love. And i know i am more than just some guy to her, ive met her mother (as a friend ofc), and ive gained her trust. She even shared her fb with me, which is a big deal as a 19 yo. She has also said I love you, but she seems to have taken it back. She weights those words highly, and i can understand she doesnt love me (yet?). Also while skyping yday, i went away for 20mins without my phone, ignoring her. She freaked out, and eventually waked the friend i live with to come get me. Doesnt that say something?.idk. Im not gonna lie, i want NC in hopes she wlll come running..

 

I was friends with the MW, and knew her family quite well before we started an affair. I wish I had the balls then before the affair happened to walk right up to her husband and say how I felt, and that she was pursuing me for a relationship while she was married. In the end she went back to "save" her marriage. In reality she saved it from shame and other reasons (legal ones as well). It did NOT stop her at the very end from saying, "I just wish we could still be friends."

 

At that point my callous feelings towards halfhearted love made me a cold man. To this day I am a cold blooded MF in relationships when someone does something half way. I know it's brutal, but it's usually fair. Most people don't want fairness.

 

Which brings me back to you.

 

 

The problem you have is that you've banged this chick already. If she really values you, she'll make a SOLID 100 PERCENT decision. If you want a girl who rides two horses at the same time, stay in the circus; otherwise GTFO, and quickly.

 

Do not under any circumstances accept her into your life if she comes running. Because she'll bleed you dry. If the relationship is meant to be, then it is more than ready to face the consequences (of people's actions).

Edited September 29, 2015 by Eagle's-bargain
Something grammar related. Allegedly

[Poppy47]

I get your point. But its hard, i believe ive truely fallen deeply in love. And i know i am more than just some guy to her, ive met her mother (as a friend ofc), and ive gained her trust. She even shared her fb with me, which is a big deal as a 19 yo. She has also said I love you, but she seems to have taken it back. She weights those words highly, and i can understand she doesnt love me (yet?). Also while skyping yday, i went away for 20mins without my phone, ignoring her. She freaked out, and eventually waked the friend i live with to come get me. Doesnt that say something?.idk. Im not gonna lie, i want NC in hopes she wlll come running..

 

It says to me she's a control freak. If not that then there is some other mental instablility. Don't mistake her actions for love.

 

What is so wonderful about this girl anyway???? Are there not a million unattached 19 year old girls out there waiting to find a nice guy.

 

Run away from her or she'll keep dragging you back and making you miserable.

She has one boyfriend but wants to keep you dangling like a little fish on a line.

Focus on your study and find some new friends.

 

I have a 19 year old grandson and I would tell him exactly the same.

 

Kind Wishes,

Poppy.

[Clarence_Boddicker]

It's not complicated at all. She is with who she needs to be with at the moment. He's her provider. Can you be that for her? Can you put a roof over her head? If yes, give her an ultimatum. She has to choose between him & you. If it's him, you are gone & out of her life. If you can't provide for her, wait until you can. A lot of guys would be happy to have a FWB, even if she's with someone else.

[AShyguy]

Hey. I posted a while back about my situation, and here i am again. I am the OM, the girl has a boyfriend (for 1 yr) and we have been doing things for 3,5 months. I love her.

 

Now she spent this weekend with me, and we threw a party. This ended with a mutual friend (of girl and her bf) finding out about the affair. So she got really stressed out, and im not sure if her bf got to know or not..However its not the first time, bf has found out twice alrd that she has been romantically involved with me. (not that we had sex tho). So she decided yesterday that she couldnt take the stress anymore, and told me we couldnt continue like this. She still wanted contact and friendship tho. After talking to her, she said she still loved me, but that she wanted to give her bf more attention and see if she could find the same love with him again. And that she thought it will be temporary, and that we might hook up at a later point if things dont turn out.

 

I just dont get it...She says she still loves me , but she doesnt have the courage to break up. He is to nice.. and she is uncertain if i really love her. Now im thinking:

 

Is she staying with him because its safe, because she knows he wont leave her, and that she isnt as certain with me? What can i do in that case?

 

Or is she using me as a backup, if things dont go south with him? Ive told her i will always love her, and that im here if she ever changes her mind etc. Should i say to her that i will be dating or something? show her that she might lose me if she waits to long? or something else?

 

Any other thoughts? Ive posted here before, so if anyone got curious u can read my old thread for more info

.We are both 19 by the way.

 

I really love her.. and i really want to win her back. I feel like her descission isnt based on what she wants, but that she if afraid of being alone etc (she has always been dumped; never dumped someone, even when they cheated multiple times)

 

Please give some advice, i would appreaciate it. Thanks for reading Sry if it got messy...

[Shadowburn]

You need to step back and let her figure things out on her own. If you continue to be involved, she'll continue to be confused.

 

She knows how you feel, no need to hang around to prove it.

No need to rub in her face you will be dating because it will only make her desperately cling on to you for all the wrong reasons.

Decide in your mind how long you're willing to wait around, but if after 2-3 months things are not changing and she is still "confused", you need to cut the contact and move on with your life.

There are much more things to do and more people to love to waste your time being someone's back up plan.

 

Best wishes xoxo

[trailrunner1975]

Send her packing- don't be her option. Sounds flaky to me.

[sunburned]

You are B.) The backup plan.

 

I'm sorry but you guys are only 19, too young for all this drama. It's hard to leave a marriage, especially when kids are involved. But there is no marriage and there are no children here. If I were you, I'd bow out of her life completely (no friendship!). Let her see what life is like without you. You can let her know you'll be happy to see her when she has completely broken up with her BF. But also let her know you will continue to date and may not be available. Stop playing second fiddle to a cheater.

[Lovemesomehim]

If she knew who and what she wanted, she would only have one man in her life.

[Shadowburn]

OMG I just realized your'e guys are 19.

 

I revise my advise because I missed that part completely.

Abort the mission STAT.

[Eagle's-bargain]

Please give some advice, i would appreaciate it. Thanks for reading Sry if it got messy...

 

Keep in mind many of the old timers here are not marginalizing your feelings, - and I can ONLY SPECULATE ON THIS - but you need time to explore who you are first and get out.

 

For me personally you should NEVER be a plan B, second option, or whatever. I have made that clear with a woman I was interested in, who wasn't my ex-AP. I made it clear that I can't be a second option, or your last resort. If I were, I'd be marginalized in terms of my feelings. That's not ok for me, but are you ok with it?

 

My goal here on LS is simple, to close or no longer use my account when I have a healthy relationship with a woman that I love, but also loves me for who I am, and wants to participate in my life (as I would like to do the same). That's all. There has to be at least one other person in the same boat feeling wise.

 

Keep reading what you see posted here and hold fast.

If you feel like you must contact her, especially if you feel this way in the morning. Get up whilst naked, and iron a couple of shirts with "Four Seasons" by Vivaldi playing (loud) in the background. It worked for me.

[AShyguy]

So we talked more today, tried to clear things out. She told me she feels so guilty for her Bf, that all her attention the past months has been going towards me. So she told me she wlll try to ignore her feelings towards me, and focus on him for a little while. She did however say that she doesnt mind me continuing to express my feelings to her.

 

Then just now, as we went to sleep (few hours after chat) i told her good night, and that i love her. She told me she loved me too.. (and this was in a language where."i love you" only has one, very serious and deep meaning). Then she told me to hang onto the card i gave her when she was here this weekend, and that is was the sweetest and best gift she had ever gotten... basically hinting that she wants to come back. (I made her a card from scratch).

 

Im so split guys... srsly..I know alot of you are experienced and know this. But i burst into tears everytime i think about a future without her.. I feel like she is not doing what she wants (being with me), but what she feels is right, and that she is afraid

 

FYI: she does live with him,however no economical obligations.

[bubbaganoosh]

You know I hope you have a good medical plan. Sooner or later the girls BF is going to get really pissed and hunt you down like a crazed dog and give you 20 minuets worth of you ain't seen nothing yet.

 

I hope you wise up and back off before it comes down to that but how long are you going to allow this girl to play you like a fool? She's doing a good job of it and your allowing it to happen.

 

Even if she broke up with the other fool and wanted to be with you, what makes you think that she wouldn't do the same thing to you.

 

It's time for you to start growing up and start thinking with your big head because your going to find yourself in a situation that has all the ingredients for a lot of trouble.

[goodyblue]

I have six kids, five of them boys. If any woman treated any of them that way my sincere advice would be that she is not being kind to you. The kind thing would be to let you go so she could focus on her boyfriend and you can find someone who is not otherwise entangled.

 

I know it hurts to lose someone you care for but that is just not enough reason to stay and be hurt just as much,or worse.

 

Ahh, being young and in love... can really suck. ?

[AShyguy]

All these advices seem to point towards me just leaving her, ignoring it. And sure, you guys are probably correct... and im just being ignorant. But damn.. i cant... I just can't. I still feel there is something special, that there is a way, that maybe our situation differs from the other.

 

She has been in pretty much the exact situation before, just opposite. She was in her BFs shoes. Her ex cheated on her with the same girl multiple times, and she forgave him every time. It didn't end before he left her for the girl he had been having an affair with. After this, she got really depressed, and had a really hard time. I'm afraid she refuses to break up with her BF, because she knows how it is. She knows how hard it is. And she just can't do that to him. She has told me she doesn't give a **** about herself anymore, and thats the impression i've gotten aswell. She doesn't seem to take decisions based on her happiness, but others.

 

Isn't there some way i may convince her? I don't feel its right to stay with someone just not to hurt them, and that you should do what u think will make u happy. Obviously my opinion is biased..

 

I feel like i might really scare her off, and screw with her if i start involving her previous relationship with this guy, into all this. Should i start making comparisons? Or try to tell her she should do what makes her right? Or tell her how hard this is for me, and maybe ask her to do this for my sake? IDK... so many thoughts..

 

I get so confused, because at one point she talks as if its all temporary, that she just needs to have some time with him, focus on him, and then decide. Then other times it seems like its all permanent... Like today, she suddenly sent a nude of herself, and a few seconds later she told me sorry, it was a mistake, a habit, and that it was rude of her. That we were friends, and its strange. Idk.

 

Im sry if i seem to discredit all the advices here, i do appreciate them. I just can't get myself to do such a thing, as ignoring her and moving on. I just cant.. And if that means getting a beating, so be it.

Edited October 20, 2015 by AShyguy

[Lois_Griffin]

My goodness. You kids are teenagers. When its all said and done, you're just teenagers.

 

She's not going to be your last love interest. Not even close. The sky isn't falling. She isn't your last chance for love.

 

You're getting all entangled in a young girl whose keeping you on a string because she's not yet sure if you're the better deal than what she's currently got. So until she decides, she'll keep you on that string. A young man with more pride would never allow himself to be used that way.

 

If you want to stay in this silly triangle basically getting di*cked around by this girl, go ahead. The fact that you're so willing to sit by and wait like a good puppy - eager to be patted on the head - makes you look needy and spineless. That's extremely unattractive to anyone.

 

Cut her loose and go out and do what boys your age are supposed to do.

[StaggerLee]

So she told me she wlll try to ignore her feelings towards me, and focus on him for a little while. She did however say that she doesnt mind me continuing to express my feelings to her.

 

I think you need to take a step back and read that back to yourself a few times, its pretty pathetic and unattractive. Sorry to sound harsh, but you need to grow a pair and tell this girl see ya later, then don't contact her. Stop making yourself so available, it displays a lack of self worth and self respect, which few girls will leave a relationship for.

 

You're better than being treated like that, like others have said never settle for being plan b. She is getting everything she wants right now because you are making it too easy for her. She doesn't have to make a choice.

 

It's painful I know. Good luck.

[AShyguy]

Havnt updated in a while, as things have been looking grim. However, recently things suddenly turned for the better, and i hope to get some advice.

 

So short summary until now: she gave her bf a new chance, and ignored her feelings towards me etc, and went all in for him.

 

However, suddenly this friday, i got a message from her out of the blue saying she was REALLY horny, and she posted a nude of herself. The past days she has become very sexual towards me again, asking about my fantasies etc, and even giving more nudes. Now i know from before, that she is a very sexual girl, likes to have sex frequent. And her BF is the opposite, maybe once a month tops. Now i wonder how i should approach this. Should i give in, tell her my fantasies, and make her horny, make her lunger for me? Or should i say "no, its not right. If u want this, you got to chose me"? What is the best solution?

 

In addition to this, even tho she decided to go all in for her BF, she still spends almost all day talking to ME. However without the feelings, the hearts etc. And when i was visiting my family, she got REALLY interested when i mentioned that she was talked about. She seems really concerned about their impressions.

 

I am getting the impression now, that the relationship isnt looking to good. Like, they dont argue, but she still spends most her time with me? And she obviously aint sexually satisfied.

[trailrunner1975]

I think you have been given very good advice already. No need to send more your way as it falls on deaf ears. Wait here's some: look up the ending scene of "not another teen movie". Sums up your situation pretty well. Especially Molly Ringwolds reaction.

[Dylon]

I wanted to reply because I see some wrong analysis from your part here and what she tells you.

 

She's very insecure. She needs lots of attention. Those are facts you can agree with I'm sure. Her history tells you all this. Her boyfriend is her security, someone safe, and looks like even though she cheated on him, he still hangs in there. You are someone she has the "hots" and "passion" for. She's too afraid to leave the safety of her bf. You haven't proven that you are that safe person and you can't. She invested time in her bf so she knows he's secure and safe. She's being rebounded many times, so over and over again, she clings each relationship for safety, fear of abandonment and rejection. She don't feel as strongly for her bf as before but she still choose safety over risking to go with her heart. It's a mistake of course but it's up to her and not you. This trait has been a lifetime in the making and you will not change her mind just like that.

 

In my opinion, she will go with you in a heart beat if she is dumped but won't leave the safety of her bf for you. Of course in the meantime, she likes what you can give her. She's quite needy of attention. Now, knowing this, what will you do? And what if you do end up with her. She's the same....one day will seek out more attention while being comfortable in your arms? You will be her rebound guy too. Also, I don't know how you do it; don't the imagination of her and her boyfriend kills you daily? So she talks to you after he's asleep, after all the comforting she provides? You can take that? I'm sorry to I bring up hurt. That must really be hard on you. I feel your pain. However, believe us when we say that you will be desired more if you back off. One day she might come to you. Just stay away and imagine how she thinks of you in your absence. It's better than making yourself available like this. If it's meant to be, she will find a way. Starve her of your attention. It's hard because you want her but you have a better chance of having her if you back off. Good luck. I know it's tough.

Edited November 2, 2015 by Dylon

[AShyguy]

I wanted to reply because I see some wrong analysis from your part here and what she tells you.

 

She's very insecure. She needs lots of attention. Those are facts you can agree with I'm sure. Her history tells you all this. Her boyfriend is her security, someone safe, and looks like even though she cheated on him, he still hangs in there. You are someone she has the "hots" and "passion" for. She's too afraid to leave the safety of her bf. You haven't proven that you are that safe person and you can't. She invested time in her bf so she knows he's secure and safe. She's being rebounded many times, so over and over again, she clings each relationship for safety, fear of abandonment and rejection. She don't feel as strongly for her bf as before but she still choose safety over risking to go with her heart. It's a mistake of course but it's up to her and not you. This trait has been a lifetime in the making and you will not change her mind just like that.

 

In my opinion, she will go with you in a heart beat if she is dumped but won't leave the safety of her bf for you. Of course in the meantime, she likes what you can give her. She's quite needy of attention. Now, knowing this, what will you do? And what if you do end up with her. She's the same....one day will seek out more attention while being comfortable in your arms? You will be her rebound guy too. Also, I don't know how you do it; don't the imagination of her and her boyfriend kills you daily? So she talks to you after he's asleep, after all the comforting she provides? You can take that? I'm sorry to I bring up hurt. That must really be hard on you. I feel your pain. However, believe us when we say that you will be desired more if you back off. One day she might come to you. Just stay away and imagine how she thinks of you in your absence. It's better than making yourself available like this. If it's meant to be, she will find a way. Starve her of your attention. It's hard because you want her but you have a better chance of having her if you back off. Good luck. I know it's tough.

 

I feel you really hit the nail on this one. It's exactly what i've thought, however yes, i've been trying to change it. And the whole "leaving her, stave her of my attention" thing is so hard, because of my really low self-esteem. I don't feel im worth anything, and ill just be replaced in a heartbeat. And yes, the thought KILLS me. Everyday for 4 months. But i have learned to live with it.

 

I just can't help to think this might be a little exception from the "basic" tho, as they aren't having sex, or very rarely. And she craves for sex. How will she hold out? Will me continuing to write sexual fantasies tease her even more, make her more desperate, or stimulate her in some sense?

[Dylon]

You said you have learned to live with it. It's only temporary that you can accept this. She's in the comfort of her bf and until she loses that, you won't be her one and only. They wouldn't be in a relationship if they don't have sex, at least not this age. Rare? Don't know but can you imagine she tells him no over and over again? I can't. I'm sorry if the words hurt, but it's sadly the reality. She needs attention and security. She will hold onto what she can to achieve those. It's true though that she's really feels for you, sexually as well, and probably have greater sex with you than with him. She might even love you as she claims. It doesn't change the fact though that she's weak, insecurity and choose her bf over exploring new options for herself, which she should be doing at that age. Think about this though.....it's rare that at that age someone would not go after someone they love. It's natural, right? So from what you said, I sense weakness in you that she might sense as well, not someone that can give her comfort, security she needs to move away from her bf. Have confidence in yourself. Afterall, she likes you so why do you even have low confidence in yourself? It's her problem of insecurity and neediness that prevent you from being together. A girl like that is difficult even if you end up being with her. If you can't let go, see if you can work on this. Don't tell her that though or she will be pissed. Be smart about it. However, I think it's best to work up to letting her miss you and see you as a strong person. Sure, it hurts to stay away, and maybe even see her disappear, but it must be done. You give her no reason to leave her bf at this point. You see that right?

[AShyguy]

You said you have learned to live with it. It's only temporary that you can accept this. She's in the comfort of her bf and until she loses that, you won't be her one and only. They wouldn't be in a relationship if they don't have sex, at least not this age. Rare? Don't know but can you imagine she tells him no over and over again? I can't. I'm sorry if the words hurt, but it's sadly the reality. She needs attention and security. She will hold onto what she can to achieve those. It's true though that she's really feels for you, sexually as well, and probably have greater sex with you than with him. She might even love you as she claims. It doesn't change the fact though that she's weak, insecurity and choose her bf over exploring new options for herself, which she should be doing at that age. Think about this though.....it's rare that at that age someone would not go after someone they love. It's natural, right? So from what you said, I sense weakness in you that she might sense as well, not someone that can give her comfort, security she needs to move away from her bf. Have confidence in yourself. Afterall, she likes you so why do you even have low confidence in yourself? It's her problem of insecurity and neediness that prevent you from being together. A girl like that is difficult even if you end up being with her. If you can't let go, see if you can work on this. Don't tell her that though or she will be pissed. Be smart about it. However, I think it's best to work up to letting her miss you and see you as a strong person. Sure, it hurts to stay away, and maybe even see her disappear, but it must be done. You give her no reason to leave her bf at this point. You see that right?

 

I do see that, and i've thought about spending less time / making her miss me. Im just afraid that might make her think im less into her, getting tired of her, etc. And thats what she is afraid of (And have expressed to me). She thinks i will get tired, find someone better, etc. She doesn't believe me. And if this was a week ago, i would probably go NC for a few days, and see. But since things are actually kinda picking up again, i feel like maybe i might screw that up.

 

Also, they do rarely have sex. Like once a month. This isn't something she is just telling me. She has told me this before we hooked up, and were just friends. That she was unhappy, and very frustrated. And even then, there isn't much time where they can have sex, SHE is literally talking to me all day. So unless its a quicky 10min, its rare. And he is 6 years older, so maybe that affects it ? Idk. But as u said, SEX is really big part of a relationship at this age, so maybe i can just wait it out? Idk..

 

Ill try letting her miss me as u said. I really find it hard giving up on her.. However, is it smart to let her know, like "I think we should take a break for a few days" or just stop talking / talk less?

 

Thanks for great advice