biggles6087 Posted October 21, 2015 Share Posted October 21, 2015 So after 10 weeks of no contact on my part my ex unblocks me on Facebook and now the site where we met anyway,I was getting random Facebook chat invites from her messenger so contact was finally made last Wed we spoke three days through Facebook I didn't mention the past or the way I was badly hurt by her actions i thought it was best left there. I carried on and told her I was getting on great an everything was going really well which it is and true ,she told me I was a really great guy and she was delighted that life was going great for me we spoke until Friday wished each other a great weekend she said contact me this week but so far no sign and I haven't been re blocked . I'm kind of wondering why contact was made this time round after she old me after the last fight she never wanted to speak to me again. The Question I'm asking is could she be on the rebound?, or is she missing me but waiting for me to chase? which I wont this time any advice please. Link to post Share on other sites
SoThatHappened Posted October 21, 2015 Share Posted October 21, 2015 She tugged on the leash and found you were still there. Yep. You were there alright. Right where she wants you. You just set yourself back, and she just got an ego boost. She'd be TELLING YOU if she wanted to be with you. She just wanted to see if you were still hung up. You showed her you were still there. What you should have done, was nothing. Block, delete, ignore. Back to NC for you. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Mcnulty Posted October 21, 2015 Share Posted October 21, 2015 She's playing with you. She's trying to ease some guilt off her fickle shoulders mate. Go no contact, block her even! Link to post Share on other sites
Glass Hut Posted October 24, 2015 Share Posted October 24, 2015 She's playing with you. She's trying to ease some guilt off her fickle shoulders mate. Go no contact, block her even! Shouldn't he just ask what she wants? Link to post Share on other sites
SoThatHappened Posted October 24, 2015 Share Posted October 24, 2015 Shouldn't he just ask what she wants? No. It doesn't do any good. She's just tugging on the leash. If she wanted to get back with him, she'd eventually tell him. Instead, she's "beating around the bush" i.e. "making sure he's still there." Not blaming women for doing this. Men do it too. It's textbook. Even if she wants him back, making her confess it would be much better than if he came crawling back via breadcrumbs. Not cynical, just honest. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Glass Hut Posted October 24, 2015 Share Posted October 24, 2015 No. It doesn't do any good. She's just tugging on the leash. If she wanted to get back with him, she'd eventually tell him. Instead, she's "beating around the bush" i.e. "making sure he's still there." Not blaming women for doing this. Men do it too. It's textbook. Even if she wants him back, making her confess it would be much better than if he came crawling back via breadcrumbs. Not cynical, just honest. I've done this too but only because I wasn't sure what reaction I'd get. But since she's the one who hurt him I agree, she'd need to flat out say what she wants. Link to post Share on other sites
NoMoreJerks Posted October 24, 2015 Share Posted October 24, 2015 I've done this too but only because I wasn't sure what reaction I'd get. But since she's the one who hurt him I agree, she'd need to flat out say what she wants. My ex did this , but it was just one email -- he wasn't sure what reaction he'd get. He was trying to provoke me in order for me to respond. He asked me if I was happy that I had "destroyed him" (he was the dumper, by the way). When I replied, and said no, because I loved him, he quickly asked for me back -- begged actually. But again, all this happened within the span of a few hrs, so it wasn't breadcrumbs. Link to post Share on other sites
Author biggles6087 Posted October 24, 2015 Author Share Posted October 24, 2015 Thanks for the advice everyone I didn't ask why best to leave the past behind us we finished up chatting on good terms last Friday hadn't heard anything since altho she said she contact me, I haven't really even been all that fussed about texting her and I haven't been looking at my phone every five minutes I wanted to show that I'm a lot stronger than I was,It was great to hear from her but if I don't feel the need to text is this the right way to be. Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted October 24, 2015 Share Posted October 24, 2015 Thanks for the advice everyone I didn't ask why best to leave the past behind us we finished up chatting on good terms last Friday hadn't heard anything since altho she said she contact me, I haven't really even been all that fussed about texting her and I haven't been looking at my phone every five minutes I wanted to show that I'm a lot stronger than I was,It was great to hear from her but if I don't feel the need to text is this the right way to be. Yes, you should not text her. You guys talked, she saw that you were open to that and that you don't hate her. She said she would contact you, so it's up to her to continue this. You do nothing and if a week goes by I would just block or ignore her if she ever contacts you again. Have zero tolerance and go by her actions and not her words. If she said she would contact you this weekend, let's see if she does. If she is interested in you, she will contact you. If not, then you are way way down her list. Link to post Share on other sites
Author biggles6087 Posted October 25, 2015 Author Share Posted October 25, 2015 Yes, you should not text her. You guys talked, she saw that you were open to that and that you don't hate her. She said she would contact you, so it's up to her to continue this. You do nothing and if a week goes by I would just block or ignore her if she ever contacts you again. Have zero tolerance and go by her actions and not her words. If she said she would contact you this weekend, let's see if she does. If she is interested in you, she will contact you. If not, then you are way way down her list. Thanks yea on the last fight we had back in July that wasn't my fault she told me that she never speak to me again,I went through hell for the last few months was heartbroken but after every fight we still manage to talk even if it is only a few messages. I'm an open guy not afraid to chat and talk about problems but she tends to run for the the hills if any problems appears on her side. There is no mention of another guy when we chatted and I noticed that she changed her facebook profile pic to a really dark face pic with just her in it I'm kind of wondering has she been dumped by someone else cause she was hell bent on not chatting to me again.I haven't blown up her phone either this time round and I think she was expecting me to be acting all needy again when I was chatting to her I did pick up on the fact that she needed space altho it wasn't my fault that the break up happend. I'm still moving on and I meeting a lady for some fun next weekend. Link to post Share on other sites
loveiswar101 Posted October 26, 2015 Share Posted October 26, 2015 Afraid as said...she tested the water....your still there...! Ego boosted. When she's bored again she will reach out. Unless she reaches out with a clear idea for you two I would move on and go NC. Great that your meeting someone next weekend. Have fun. Link to post Share on other sites
Author biggles6087 Posted November 4, 2015 Author Share Posted November 4, 2015 Sorry for the late reply guys so anyway after a few weeks of chatting and her dropping hints I decided to stick her in the friend zone I told her I wasn't accepting any messing around or games this time, she agreed but didn't sound to happy then asked me would i pop her a text this week that the halloween week she was at her mams on holidays and i was told there is no phone signal or internet signal.I said no prob so I waited all week popped her a message yesterday guess what no reply . I'm wondering did i burst her ego by putting her in the friend zone. Link to post Share on other sites
loveiswar101 Posted November 5, 2015 Share Posted November 5, 2015 I would just let this one go my friend. I'm just in the process of making that decision too. I don't think she's so much playing games but more of the same of where your at, neither are fussed if you get back together or not it seems. On her part not replying back shows this on her behalf. You friend zoning her on your side. Like mine think of the highs of the relationship, think good times had and then go yep, that's it, it was fun. (don't believe in bitterness, unless they cheated) Then draw a line in the sand. If you keep texting and contacting each other with out any solid reference to getting back together this will drag on and on. No one will be a winner there ! Link to post Share on other sites
dumbass2 Posted November 5, 2015 Share Posted November 5, 2015 Sorry for the late reply guys so anyway after a few weeks of chatting and her dropping hints I decided to stick her in the friend zone I told her I wasn't accepting any messing around or games this time, she agreed but didn't sound to happy then asked me would i pop her a text this week that the halloween week she was at her mams on holidays and i was told there is no phone signal or internet signal.I said no prob so I waited all week popped her a message yesterday guess what no reply . I'm wondering did i burst her ego by putting her in the friend zone. So you lay down the law as you say with her and put her in the friend zone which you were already in and then she asks you text her the following week and you do and nothing. I'm not surprised in the least. She will text you back when she feels like because she knows you are there. Why and the heck would you agree to text her? Just because she asked? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author biggles6087 Posted November 7, 2015 Author Share Posted November 7, 2015 So you lay down the law as you say with her and put her in the friend zone which you were already in and then she asks you text her the following week and you do and nothing. I'm not surprised in the least. She will text you back when she feels like because she knows you are there. Why and the heck would you agree to text her? Just because she asked? Sorry for the late reply keeping busy we were never friends after July I think I agreed because I be honest about this I still have massive feelings for the girl instead of waiting I got excited and said yes, Lots of emotions ad feelings came rushing back. Link to post Share on other sites
Injen Posted November 8, 2015 Share Posted November 8, 2015 I understand you have feelings for her still, but you have to stop talking to her. Until she tells you she wants to get back together she will only string you on and you will end up back on square one of the heartbreak. Being friends won't help this process either. I suggest you go back to NC, if she wanted to reconcile she would have either showed it or would respond to your text. Link to post Share on other sites
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