phil910 Posted October 23, 2015 Share Posted October 23, 2015 Hi everyone. First time posting here. & Im in dire need for some expert advice. So I've always been a socially awkward guy. I'm fat & unattractive & always escaping social interaction, especially with girls. Never really been in a meaningful relationship, except for crush on one of my cousins at puberty & then an online friend when i was around 20, both as u might have guessed were one-sided (yeah i know i already sound like a loser). anyways now im 30+ & i've had a huge crush on this beautiful girl at my office for last 4yrs, she was happily married btw. she's the sweetest person & i can feel completely at ease around her. we r great friends since the beginning, in fact she says im one of her best friends (& she doesnt have many). we used to spend all day texting each other both in & out of office & her hubby didnt mind (cos lets face it what girl in her right mind would choose me over him). i know she loves her husband deeply & he loves her too. she had her first baby couple of years ago. she could guess (& her hubby too) from my behaviour that i like her more than a friend but they were ok with it, cos it was never physical attraction. & honestly i kinda accepted that nothing's gonna happen but at least i had a great friendship going. anyways things started getting complicated lately as few days ago she said she was confused that its no more one-sided, bcos she misses me when we have an argument & not talking to each other. she feels that we r having an affair. this comes a double shock to me bcos- 1. no girl ever felt like that abt me so i really dont know how to react & 2. what if she really is just confused? i dont want to be the reason for breaking up her marriage over a confusion. her happiness is more important to me than anything else. so i need ur expert, what s'd i do now? s'd i just walk out from the whole thing? s'd i make her realise that shes just confused & its not an affair? plz help me decide. Thanx in advance. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted October 23, 2015 Share Posted October 23, 2015 Some would say she is having an emotional affair with you. She's talking to you & occupying her time with you instead of paying attention to her marriage. It's not about sex but you are there for her in ways her husband is not. She has recognized the error of her ways & is working to correct that. Sadly, you have to be gallant about the whole thing, & power down your interactions with her. No more texting. Talk only about work. But take what you have learned from her & apply it to your interactions with other women. You can talk to women You can care about another person. Perhaps add some exercise into your day to overcome what you perceive as your physical issues (being fat) and put yourself out there. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author phil910 Posted October 23, 2015 Author Share Posted October 23, 2015 Thank you d0nnivain for your valuable advice guess its time for some hard decisions... Link to post Share on other sites
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