schumalski Posted October 26, 2015 Share Posted October 26, 2015 Hey, I was wondering if anyone is willing to give me any advice or input regarding this matter. A few years ago, in late 2011, we met online in a chat room and became good friends within the next year. Over the years we became very close and fell in love, unfortunately we were not able to meet in person. She lives about a 6 hour drive from me. However, in the past year, I began to take her for granted and began to spend less time communicating with her. This obviously began to impact our relationship, I even began to treat her poorly, broke many promises to her, which hurt her a lot. In the past year, there were many periods where we would begin to talk again for a couple weeks (sometimes less), and I'd sometimes just not want to talk to her, kept pushing her away and end up ignoring her for weeks. We've been stuck in this cycle for the past year, and she has tried very hard to bring us close again. The problem is that I don't exactly know how to gain her trust back and also how to make her feel more wanted. I find it difficult to be affectionate when you're not with the person. Does anyone here have any ideas on what steps I should follow in order to make her feel wanted and gain her trust back? Also, I'm not a very open person, which makes communication hard at times, does anyone have any pointers on how one can open up emotionally? Thanks =) Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted October 26, 2015 Share Posted October 26, 2015 Ok, the long distance thing didn't work for you. You didn't have time for her and didn't care about her. Why the sudden change of wanting to make it right? If you can make it right, what actions will you take to stop this being long distance? If you don't make changes to the thing which broke you in the first place, the second time around won't be any different. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 26, 2015 Share Posted October 26, 2015 You need to meet her in person (I gathered from your post that you haven't met yet, correct me if I'm wrong) Why have you not met after 4 years, when you're not really all that far from each other? Also, you need to get to the bottom of your poor behaviour. Why did you push her away, ignore her, break promises? I've been on the receiving end of that, and let me tell you, it's awful. It also builds up so much resentment that sometimes there's no going back. Really do some self-reflection here, OP. You need to address your underlying issues before you can even think about being in a relationship. Otherwise, you'll do the same things again and again. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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