bbcc10192 Posted October 26, 2015 Share Posted October 26, 2015 (edited) I’m a 23 year old male, nearly 24. I’m still a virgin, which I mainly attribute to the fact girls aren’t attracted to me. But perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, it may also be due to another issue. That issue being ‘’down there’’ as they say. Basically I never retracted my foreskin until recently. I tried putting on a condom a few times when I was younger, but it hurt too much as it meant I had to retract my foreskin. A month and a bit ago, I began retracting my foreskin. It now retracts past the head of my penis painlessly and without any sensitive feeling. However, this is only when my penis is in a flaccid state; I have not yet managed to retract my erect penis – any time I have tried so far, it has been quite painful. I’m aware that it will take a few weeks of practice and that I will eventually master it, just like I did when it was in a flaccid state. Let’s say it should take me 6-8 weeks, meaning I should be able to comfortably retract my erect penis and put on a condom just before Christmas…. or maybe just after. Any ways, I guess I’ve reached a stage where I’m giving the dating scene my best go. I’ve joined tinder, plenty of fish, and I’ve accepted that I need to lower my standards to get girls. I’m giving it my best shot for the next few weeks with the intention of meeting girls and landing dates. But as you can guess by now…. I’m scared of the possibility of it getting to the point of having sex with a girl, as I won’t be able to retract my penis and put on a condom without it hurting. But I want to start properly meeting and dating girls, now! So, hypothetically speaking, if I do land a date with a girl and there’s a possibility of going back to one of our houses….. What can I use as a legit excuse for not having sex? Furthermore, if I start seeing a girl and it’s going somewhere good, what can I use as a legit excuse for not having sex? Excuses I’m NOT willing to use: (1) I’m religious (2) I have an STD (3) I don’t believe in sex too soon (4) I want to take things slowly. In other words, am I screwed? lol Edited October 26, 2015 by bbcc10192 Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted October 26, 2015 Share Posted October 26, 2015 Fix your foreskin problem - if you need a doctor, go to one, they've seen it all. In the meanwhile, you can: 1) Space your dates less frequently (once a week? Not many girls will think sex is acceptable by date 3-4, this gives you a month) 2) Stay far from houses (dates on "neutral" territory) 3) Stay away from dates involving drinking And then if you still need excuse: 1) You want to be exclusive first (no normal girl will say no to that, and is different from taking the things slow... Here you're just evaluating is she the one that you want exclusivity with) 2) You want BOTH to get STD tests before starting to have sex (a good move anyway... and it can take slow time of the labs to process results) 3) Or really, just tell that your foreskin is causing you pain if you use condom, and you're working to fix the problem (well, intimate details, but isn't sex all about intimacy?) I’m a 23 year old male, nearly 24. I’m still a virgin, which I mainly attribute to the fact girls aren’t attracted to me. But perhaps, perhaps, perhaps, it may also be due to another issue. That issue being ‘’down there’’ as they say. Basically I never retracted my foreskin until recently. I tried putting on a condom a few times when I was younger, but it hurt too much as it meant I had to retract my foreskin. A month and a bit ago, I began retracting my foreskin. It now retracts past the head of my penis painlessly and without any sensitive feeling. However, this is only when my penis is in a flaccid state; I have not yet managed to retract my erect penis – any time I have tried so far, it has been quite painful. I’m aware that it will take a few weeks of practice and that I will eventually master it, just like I did when it was in a flaccid state. Let’s say it should take me 6-8 weeks, meaning I should be able to comfortably retract my erect penis and put on a condom just before Christmas…. or maybe just after. Any ways, I guess I’ve reached a stage where I’m giving the dating scene my best go. I’ve joined tinder, plenty of fish, and I’ve accepted that I need to lower my standards to get girls. I’m giving it my best shot for the next few weeks with the intention of meeting girls and landing dates. But as you can guess by now…. I’m scared of the possibility of it getting to the point of having sex with a girl, as I won’t be able to retract my penis and put on a condom without it hurting. But I want to start properly meeting and dating girls, now! So, hypothetically speaking, if I do land a date with a girl and there’s a possibility of going back to one of our houses….. What can I use as a legit excuse for not having sex? Furthermore, if I start seeing a girl and it’s going somewhere good, what can I use as a legit excuse for not having sex? Excuses I’m NOT willing to use: (1) I’m religious (2) I have an STD (3) I don’t believe in sex too soon (4) I want to take things slowly. In other words, am I screwed? lol 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author bbcc10192 Posted October 26, 2015 Author Share Posted October 26, 2015 Thank you for the advice, and especially the last part about just being upfront. I think most girls would understand and respond maturely if I just told them that the foreskin/condom issue has been a problem for me. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
almond Posted October 27, 2015 Share Posted October 27, 2015 Instead of focusing your energy on finding a good excuse to get out of sex, find a solution! See your doctor. Sort out the problem and move forward without the need to avoid sex and make up excuses. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
PegNosePete Posted October 27, 2015 Share Posted October 27, 2015 Since when do guys need an excuse for not having sex?? Usually it's the other way around! As said above: arrange dates out in public, avoid home/dinner/netflix dates and you should be fine for at least a couple of months. During that time see a doctor to sort out your issue. 3) Or really, just tell that your foreskin is causing you pain if you use condom I don't think that's a good idea. Many women hear all kinds of excuses from guys who want to go bareback. The moment you say you can't use a condom, her eyes will roll. If you do have to explain the issue then ensure you make it clear that it's not just a creepy excuse to avoid the condom, and that since you can't put a condom on, you aren't able to have sex (yet). Link to post Share on other sites
Author bbcc10192 Posted November 20, 2015 Author Share Posted November 20, 2015 I have a date next Tuesday! And I still have my 'problem' We are going for a few drinks, and there is a chance it could come to ''so let's go back to mine or yours?'' I don't know what to say or do if it comes to that.... I'm not comfortable discussing the truth about my ''foreskin problem'' Help someone, please!!! Link to post Share on other sites
moonwalker86 Posted November 20, 2015 Share Posted November 20, 2015 I'd suggest retracting the skin and leaving it like that all day in your undies of course lol. If it hurts to do it when it's erect maybe try vaseline beforehand? I had this issue when I was around 12 but it went away after a lot of teenage masterbation lol. Sorry for the tmi. Link to post Share on other sites
Author bbcc10192 Posted November 21, 2015 Author Share Posted November 21, 2015 The date got changed to tonight now! Link to post Share on other sites
CarrieT Posted November 21, 2015 Share Posted November 21, 2015 OP, why haven't you gone to a doctor? Link to post Share on other sites
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