I can approach women, but I'm having difficulty keeping them 'interested'.

[MikeViper]

Hey, Mike here and I've come here, because, while I can approach women fine, I'm having a hard time keeping them interested. Now, to get started, lets start off with the fact that I'm 15 and all of the girls I've approached so far, go to my school. Back to the matter at hand, girls don't seem to be 'interested' in me and while I can approach them, there just seems to be no "Spark" or "Chemistry" between us. This is my 'approach', that, while getting the womans attention doesn't seem to be grabbing interest.

 

1. I make eye contact with the girl.

2. I put my arm around her.

3. If I already know the girl, I say, "Hey, [entername]", but if I don't, I say, "Hey, you got a name?"

4. If I use the "Hey, you got a name" line, she'll of course, tell me her name and usually says, "You got a name?" back to me and I tell her "Yeah, I'm Mike.".

5. Now, this is where I start messing up, the conversation phase. I start off by asking a question, but while she'll answer the question, she won't really go in-depth on it, but will give a simple "Yes." or "No.". Yet, I see other guys, starting conversations the same way and they can go on and on with girls. With me, it eventually comes down to an interview with the girl, I keep asking her questions and when I can't think of anything else, I make my escape and say "Well, it was nice talking to you, see you later.". What am I doing wrong that comes off as "boring" and "uninteresting" to this girl? How do I make the girl take interest in the conversation, so that she actually opens up and gives me her opinion about the question at hand? How do I "Attract" her and make her, WANT to continue the conversation? Advice on these things would be well appreciated.

 

Now, here, I'm going to give examples, of what I mean, by "uninterested", from a couple of girls that I've approached.

 

Tina

Tina is a nice girl, fairly smart and certainly attractive. So I saw her on the bus and asked her if I could sit down next to her, no questions asked, she smiled and told me "Sure.". I tried to start conversation by going "So, how was school today?" She said "Good." and there was a pause. Now, I'd been thinking about approaching Tina for a long time before this happened, her friend Lauren, even told me that I "should talk to her.". Now, the way it occurred in my mind, was that I go on the bus and ask her if I can sit down with her and if she said yes, I would then ask her "How school was today.", things seemed to be going pretty much the way I'd planned. However, I expected her to say something along the lines of "Well, this happened... that happened..." and to expand off of that, however she simply said "Good.". So from this point I tried to start conversation once again by asking her what she was listening to, I don't exactly remember the name of the band she told me, but I remember asking, "Is that a rock band?" and then she said "Yes.". So then for the rest of the bus ride, I just sat there, still next to her in the seat, wondering "Huh? Well, I had the conversation part going, but why? But hmm.. For some reason I'm not grabbing her interest." and Tina just sort of looked out the window, listening to her music; I clearly wasn't grabbing this chicks interest.

 

For those who don't want to read through all of that, here's a dialogue of what happened.

 

[i engage in eye contact with her]

Me: Hey, Tina.

[Tina looks at me]

Me: Hey, Tina is it okay if I sit with you?

[Tina Smiles]

Tina: Sure!

[i sit down]

Me: So... how was school today?

Tina: Oh, good.

[Pause for a few seconds]

Me: So... what are you listening to?

Tina: [she stated a band name, but I can't remember the name of it.]

Me: Oh, that rock music?

[Tina nods]

Tina: Yep.

 

And for the rest of the ride, we didn't talk at all. I just sat there wondering why she was interested and Tina just basically sat there looking out the window, listening to her CD Player.

[johnnyl321]

Hi Mike,

 

very interesting name you have. Mike Viper. Unique. Anyway, back to your dilemma. Holding a female's interest can be a lot of fun. First thing you want to make sure of is "Be You". Whatever you want to talk about, talk about. Don't approach girls with the only intent being "I'm going to talk to her and ask her out", just relax. Be calm and confident. Most women from ages 14-54 will tell you they like confidence in men. The only way to be confident is to deal with subjects that you enjoy. For example, if you see a girl listening to a CD and you ask what band it is, listen to her response and then reply with "I like to listen to......".

Another thing to do to keep people talking is to always ask questions. I'm a salesman by trade and I'm good at it. People like to talk about themselves. It makes them feel special, and we all want to feel special. I know it's hard sometimes to "make' someone talk, but don't give up easily.

And remember this Mike. In time, you will learn more about yourself. Right now, you're 15 and you truly do have the world in front of you. Enjoy your teenage years, because they'll never come around again. If the girl won't respond to you, don't waste time. Look instead for the girls that like to hang out with you. One thing anyone over 30 will tell you, after a while, it's not about the looks, but how you treat one another.

good luck Mr. Viper

[alphamale]

M.V., go out to a large bookstore and buy the book "how to succeed with women" by Louis and Copeland

 

it will tell u all you need to know and more.

good luck

alpha

[Marshbear]

When you first approach and ask their name, keep the conversation short and simple. Over time when you see them again you can go more into depth but not to much depth. Make them want to continue the conversation. The best way to get a womens attention is to make your exit when you have them so engrossed and you will really upset them by leaving. You will have their attention and the work to talk will be much less.

 

It works if they are the least bit interested.

 

Peace...

[amerikajin]

Mike,

 

Now, this is where I start messing up, the conversation phase

 

Step five isn't where you're screwing up; it's actually in step two. Don't ever touch a woman unless she's touched you first.

 

By the time you're getting to step five, the girl's already uncomfortable and trying to figure out how to end the conversation with you. That's why the conversation keeps dying.

 

Take Alpha's advice. Get a book and reading the signs and playing the dynamics.