jalapeno86 Posted October 28, 2015 Share Posted October 28, 2015 How can I stop thinking about her? I here all the same advice. People say, get busy, hang with friends, time heals all, and date other people. And, there are many other schools of thought too. But, we broke up 6 months ago. Up until a month ago I still wished she would wake up next to me one day. Then, we started having casual sex, and she did wake up next to me. I still cried while she was gone. I knew she would leave again. I got drunk and made a fool of myself. I'm swearing off alcohol. I realize I have a huge problem. The alcohol, and my ex. Those are both things I have to give up. Just, what do you guys do? What happens when you're out with friends and then for 30 seconds your attention leaves the conversation and you start to replay what happened in your head, and wonder if you did things differently she'd be back in your life? Then, your friends are there for you, but you know it's exhausting for them. For some, it's great. But, what happens when you're home alone, and feel like crying, and ... isn't it just the most horrible thing? How do you stop it? I really need to talk to someone. But, all my friends are drunks. Link to post Share on other sites
TheLoveBelow92 Posted October 28, 2015 Share Posted October 28, 2015 How can I stop thinking about her? I here all the same advice. People say, get busy, hang with friends, time heals all, and date other people. And, there are many other schools of thought too. But, we broke up 6 months ago. Up until a month ago I still wished she would wake up next to me one day. Then, we started having casual sex, and she did wake up next to me. I still cried while she was gone. I knew she would leave again. I got drunk and made a fool of myself. I'm swearing off alcohol. I realize I have a huge problem. The alcohol, and my ex. Those are both things I have to give up. Just, what do you guys do? What happens when you're out with friends and then for 30 seconds your attention leaves the conversation and you start to replay what happened in your head, and wonder if you did things differently she'd be back in your life? Then, your friends are there for you, but you know it's exhausting for them. For some, it's great. But, what happens when you're home alone, and feel like crying, and ... isn't it just the most horrible thing? How do you stop it? I really need to talk to someone. But, all my friends are drunks. Its weird Im in the exact same boat and just posted a thread looking for the same answers, Its crap I know and not a feeling I ever had before which makes it feel a lot worse, we will get through it, I think I need to push away a bit myself into some new peoples lives maybe hang out with some new people and maybe eventually someone to date again. I know because in days weeks or years this will happen eventually, its just that im not there yet, Link to post Share on other sites
darkbloom Posted October 28, 2015 Share Posted October 28, 2015 Okay. I'm going to stop you there. She's not breaking your heart at this point. You're ALLOWING her to do it. You have to decide that you don't want to hurt anymore. You're still going to think about her and wonder. But you know what? She BROKE UP with YOU. she's decided that she doesn't want to make you ger priority anymore. So why would you spend a single second more of your time wanting someone that doesn't want you? There are literally a billion other women on this planet. Find your balls and reattach them to your body. The pain ends when you decide to end it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author jalapeno86 Posted October 28, 2015 Author Share Posted October 28, 2015 My break up in 2013 wasn't as bad because (1) we were only together for a few months (2) I had a friend that was by my side day and night and (3) I wasn't in school, so I really could just do nothing all day. During this break up, I don't have anyone really close to me willing to just hang around and smoke weed. I am also in the middle of my semester at school. Mid-terms were fine, but this past week I haven't been able to sit through my reading because I feel like I'm going to start crying. I do have a tinder date tonight. This is like history repeating itself. When me and my recent ex broke up, six months ago, I dated around. I was a mess though. I still looked at my phone waiting to see if she called or texted. This time, will be different though. I am really staying away from alcohol. And, I'm not going to date girls I think aren't good enough and treat them like crap. I really just want to have a female friend, to be there for and take care of, and not abandon in order to get back with my ex. I am really just going to do me, and keep it all to myself. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jalapeno86 Posted October 28, 2015 Author Share Posted October 28, 2015 You're right, you guys. Thanks for the responses. I have to reattach my balls. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jalapeno86 Posted October 28, 2015 Author Share Posted October 28, 2015 TheLoveBelow... you know, that was my favorite album... I had my heartbroken back then in high school too... It's ****ed up because... won't we face loss again in our lives? I haven't had anyone really close to me die yet. But, I've had three huge breakups over 10 years... it's always debilitating. I'm glad I'm staying away from alcohol though. Especially during this time. Link to post Share on other sites
darkbloom Posted October 28, 2015 Share Posted October 28, 2015 You might want to lay off the pot for awhile as well. It kills motivation. Link to post Share on other sites
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