best for who?

[66Charger]

I fell for a woman who lives so far and will for 3 more years. We are no longer together and perhaps that is how it should be. However our seperation is forced. At the end, by me. Mistakes may have been made, but I just lost the faith that it would happen and be the forever. I still think about her everyday and wonder what could have been. I know deep down the root cause for me was I did not want to do a LDR. It sucks. We are both the type that needs positive affirmation. She needs the communication and I need the touch. When indid not get the touch, I withdrew the communication and it all collapsed.

 

At this point, I wonder why God brought this woman before me. Everything in my heart said go. A lot in my head said hold on. I know deep down I loved her and wanted the forever, but perhaps it just wasnt reasonable. I really thought we belonged to each other, but I no longer think so.

 

So I force myself to not think of her. To not dream of her. To not read what she writes because the message is not good. We are both moving on. Unfortunately I have to kill a dream.

 

Maybe in a few years if we are free, I will buy the general store and she will buy the resteraunt next door.

 

This is the hardest thing I have ever done

[HopeForTomorrow]

I don't think anyone would voluntarily choose to do an LDR. Especially for 3 years. Not unless the relationship was incredibly deep and real.

 

However there are ways to make it work so that needs are met as much as possible during that time. Not easy, but then nothing that really matters comes easily.

 

You can choose to kill a dream because things aren't optimal, but then what are you left with?

[lity444]

Yes, I wonder whom is it best for.

 

Did you ask her if she was willing to move? Does she know how you feel? I get that you want the touch and that you cannot do the LDR, it's totally legitimate. But did you exhaust your options to be with her?

[Michelle ma Belle]

How did you meet? Have you ever been in the same room at the same time or this purely a virtual relationship (phone/text/email/Skype)?

[66Charger]

Yes, I wonder whom is it best for.

 

Did you ask her if she was willing to move? Does she know how you feel? I get that you want the touch and that you cannot do the LDR, it's totally legitimate. But did you exhaust your options to be with her?

 

I am pretty sure she will move when her youngest goes to college. Thats 3 years away. We are 2000 miles apart, so it wasnt a unreasonable distance. I dont think she really knows how I feel, because I surely dont. On the one hand, there is reason, on the other hand, the heart knows no reason, it feels only, without thought.. As far as options, the only option I have is to wait or forget she ever existed. Dont know if I can do either

[66Charger]

We met online in a relationship forum. I was attracted to her in a strange way for a long time. As soon as she posted something, I would see her name and wonder who she was. She made contact with me (a little hostile at first) but then it was on. Right away for both of us. We had the opportunity to meet, but it didnt happen and I lost faith. I guess my real question is how do you make a LDR work? How do you trust blindly? How do you handle the longing, the desire, the need to touch. How do you wait on a promise and a prayer.

 

Deep down, i know the LDR is a big problem and probaly my only real issue with her. I prefer to control my own destiny, but a woman can twist things, change your entire life and direction. I can leave her in my brain but I am not able to leave her in my heart. It is a fierce battle within me. Desire versus reason. Passion versus common sense. Dreams versus reality. 66charger versus Romeo and Juliet.

 

It is so much easier to not love.

[Shinebrightforever]

So sorry, Charger. That has to hurt like hell. I so wish it was easier for the both of you.