Disappointed Again Posted March 28, 2001 Share Posted March 28, 2001 Hi, I met this guy at my school (through a mutual friend) several weeks ago. Ever since then, this man has been very chatty and flirtatious every time we encounter. Last week, he and I went to this bar (that all of my classmates go to on a regular basis). We spent the entire night talking and flirting. I had the best time and found myself really attracted/interested in this guy. He walked me home and we kissed for a while on my couch and then he left. The next day he asked me to go out with him on Friday with his friends. The following day he called to make the plans and we again had a nice conversation on the phone. On Friday we went out and had a great time. The entire night was very flirtatiuos and he was being very considerate of me. There weren't any awkward silences, we simply had a great time. He took me home and we fooled around very mildly on the couch again. Since it had gotten so late, I offered to let him stay the night, but he said he had to get back becouse he was leaving town the next day. Anyway, i emailed him telling him thanks and letting him know I had a great time. He wrote back the same to me. Now yesterday, I went back to usual bar and found him there. He was very friendly at first, but when I talked to another classmate of mine he disappeared. He spent the rest of the night talking to another woman. Needless to say, I am very hurt. I don't often have such a strong sense that something could be good (lie I did with this guy). Do I have very poor judgement, I can't believe I could have mistaken this guys interest so much. Could there be a misunderstanding here, or is it pretty blatant that he he not interested? Is there anything I can do, I am still interested in him? Tonight we play on the same team, should i not go, or should i go and see how he acts? Link to post Share on other sites
JustAGirl Posted March 28, 2001 Share Posted March 28, 2001 I'm no expert but sounds like u let him know u like him WAY too early... and the kissing/fooling around could've waited another few weeks also... I'd go to the game (cmon, miss fun b/c of him?? psshhh!) and just be nice and friendly, same as with everyone... if he tries to go out with u again - i'd go since u wanna, but i'd play WAY more hard to get... and make sure he sees u flirting with others too... Just my view... Good luck! Link to post Share on other sites
Ed Posted March 28, 2001 Share Posted March 28, 2001 I think you offered the sleep over too soon. Some other guy might have jumped at the chance to spend the night with you. This guy was not ready for that yet or it may have been a turn off for him. You may never know. Don't worry about it. Just think, you could be on this site asking what to do because you slept with a guy and now he won't give you the time of day. Chalk it up to experience. You did no harm and you have nothing to be ashamed of. Go to the game and have fun; go to the bar and have fun. He'll let you know if has further interest in you. Lighten up a little. This one guy is not going to make or break your life. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted March 29, 2001 Share Posted March 29, 2001 This man has no obligations to you whatsoever. Don't change any plans or anything else in your life in any way on his account. Until you are in a committed relationship with him, anything you conjure up in your mind about your relationship with him is your responsibility...not his. Link to post Share on other sites
Laurynn Posted March 29, 2001 Share Posted March 29, 2001 Hi there! Men are a definite mystery. After all, Men are from Mars. LOL If I was in your situation, I'd be feeling the exact same way...perplexed, hurt, confused, all of that. I really have no idea why he did a 180 like that. Maybe he's a Don Juan?...goes from one woman to another...and that night at the bar, he'd found 'another'...maybe he's the kind of guy who loves the 'thrill of the chase', and once he gets a woman, the excitement is gone, so he moves onto the next. Maybe your offer to let him spend the night freaked him out?..maybe he took that as a sign from you that you wanted 'things' to move faster than he was ready for...and he panicked. If I were you, I'd go to the game like usual. No sense changing your life becuz of him :-) If it was me, I'd probably want to get to the truth, so I'd ask him what was up...or maybe email him and ask (might be more comfortable doing it that way). Let us know what you find out! Again, sorry :-( L Hi, I met this guy at my school (through a mutual friend) several weeks ago. Ever since then, this man has been very chatty and flirtatious every time we encounter. Last week, he and I went to this bar (that all of my classmates go to on a regular basis). We spent the entire night talking and flirting. I had the best time and found myself really attracted/interested in this guy. He walked me home and we kissed for a while on my couch and then he left. The next day he asked me to go out with him on Friday with his friends. The following day he called to make the plans and we again had a nice conversation on the phone. On Friday we went out and had a great time. The entire night was very flirtatiuos and he was being very considerate of me. There weren't any awkward silences, we simply had a great time. He took me home and we fooled around very mildly on the couch again. Since it had gotten so late, I offered to let him stay the night, but he said he had to get back becouse he was leaving town the next day. Anyway, i emailed him telling him thanks and letting him know I had a great time. He wrote back the same to me. Now yesterday, I went back to usual bar and found him there. He was very friendly at first, but when I talked to another classmate of mine he disappeared. He spent the rest of the night talking to another woman. Needless to say, I am very hurt. I don't often have such a strong sense that something could be good (lie I did with this guy). Do I have very poor judgement, I can't believe I could have mistaken this guys interest so much. Could there be a misunderstanding here, or is it pretty blatant that he he not interested? Is there anything I can do, I am still interested in him? Tonight we play on the same team, should i not go, or should i go and see how he acts? Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Mojo Posted March 29, 2001 Share Posted March 29, 2001 .....actually, arent' we all? i have learnt that if i feel i have to 'figure someone out', i'd only be wasting my time. i'll just let it be their problem if i don't understand what's going on, and not let them emotionally waste my time. if someone is going to give me mixed signals and mess with my head and not make things clear to me, then they come back at a later date when they won't do that again, or they can bugger off for good. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted March 29, 2001 Share Posted March 29, 2001 Well, you know what I mean.... Link to post Share on other sites
Miss Mojo Posted March 29, 2001 Share Posted March 29, 2001 ....lol! ahh tony, you're a dag (is that because some men are full of it??) Link to post Share on other sites
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