Author seeingthisguy Posted November 15, 2015 Author Share Posted November 15, 2015 No, you're not a bad person, you are someone who doesnt want drama in her life. This woman sounds like trouble, as you say WTF? So glad you agree. Looks like she got the message though, cause it appears as though she cancelled her friend request. Lol. Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Several possibilities here... a) She did it by accident - stalking your profile and accidentally friend requested you. b) She wants to be friends because she wants you to see all of her updates with your ex, which makes her immature and very sick. c) She is insecure and wants to know who you are and what your ex saw in you. d) Your ex went into her profile and sent the request! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BC1980 Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 I had the same thing happen to me several years ago. It was the GF of an ex I dated in college. I declined it of course. She probably did it by accident when she was stalking your FB page. Link to post Share on other sites
Ic1 Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 I recently had an ex I was engaged to try to friend me recently! She sent a message after my recline saying she wondered how I was doing. (~6 years after breakup that wasn't smooth) After I deleted it, she sent another message telling me how she was moving to NYC and needed some money. Didn't even read whole letter of a message and blocked her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author seeingthisguy Posted November 15, 2015 Author Share Posted November 15, 2015 Several possibilities here... a) She did it by accident - stalking your profile and accidentally friend requested you. b) She wants to be friends because she wants you to see all of her updates with your ex, which makes her immature and very sick. c) She is insecure and wants to know who you are and what your ex saw in you. d) Your ex went into her profile and sent the request! I 100% think it was both B & C. I wish this didn't bother me, but for some reason I'm really upset by it. I know it's her insecurity, but I feel like I'm under a microscope even though I'm minding my own business. Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 I 100% think it was both B & C. I wish this didn't bother me, but for some reason I'm really upset by it. I know it's her insecurity, but I feel like I'm under a microscope even though I'm minding my own business. Block your ex and her. I had a similar situation and I just blocked all parties involved. You won't regret it. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author seeingthisguy Posted November 15, 2015 Author Share Posted November 15, 2015 Block your ex and her. I had a similar situation and I just blocked all parties involved. You won't regret it. It's hard because I want him in my life as a friend, and he says he wants to be friends too. That's fine, but then we see eachother and he starts making comments about wanting to take my clothes off? It just throws me for a loop. Why date someone else if you're still so attracted to me that you can't keep your sh*t in check, in front of her no less? Wtf. Link to post Share on other sites
Ic1 Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 It's hard because I want him in my life as a friend, and he says he wants to be friends too. That's fine, but then we see eachother and he starts making comments about wanting to take my clothes off? It just throws me for a loop. Why date someone else if you're still so attracted to me that you can't keep your sh*t in check, in front of her no less? Wtf. Sounds like he's not at a point in his life, seeing a correct perspective, and/or mature enough for a true dedicated relationship. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author seeingthisguy Posted November 16, 2015 Author Share Posted November 16, 2015 Block your ex and her. I had a similar situation and I just blocked all parties involved. You won't regret it. Bah ahhahaha so I took your advice. Hilariously enough, I block her on FB, and LinkedIn notifies me this morning saying she was the last person to view (creep) my profile. Not going to lie to you, now it's kind of funny. Link to post Share on other sites
kismetkismet Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 It's hard because I want him in my life as a friend, and he says he wants to be friends too. That's fine, but then we see eachother and he starts making comments about wanting to take my clothes off? It just throws me for a loop. Why date someone else if you're still so attracted to me that you can't keep your sh*t in check, in front of her no less? Wtf. He said that IN FRONT of her??? No wonder she's insecure! He doesn't sound like someone who really wants to be a proper friend to you if he's putting you in such an awkward position and not respecting the boundaries of a proper ex friendship.. I'd keep them both out of your life to avoid further drama. If I were her I wouldn't want him around either. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 I think I speak for everyone when I say "WT actual F" on this one. For some reason, my ex-bf's new gf is trying to befriend me. Why? And does not wanting to be her friend in any way make me a bad person? You don't owe her access to your intimate circle of friends just because she sent you a friend request, nor is she owed an explanation as to why you won't add her. She's not your friend in real life; she certainly ins't entitled to be your virtual friend. Link to post Share on other sites
kendahke Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 Why date someone else if you're still so attracted to me that you can't keep your sh*t in check, in front of her no less? Wtf. Understand this: he didn't choose you. He chose her. He chose her to allow into his intimacy, but turns around and mocks both of you by talking this isht to you in front of her. What kind of a friend is that? For me, that is enough to not want to be their friend. He doesn't respect the feelings of either one of you. She wants to be your friend so she can stalk you because she's worried that he will withdraw that choice and she's scrambling to make sure he keeps choosing her. Block her and him. This is too messy already. Link to post Share on other sites
Author seeingthisguy Posted November 17, 2015 Author Share Posted November 17, 2015 Understand this: he didn't choose you. He chose her. He chose her to allow into his intimacy, but turns around and mocks both of you by talking this isht to you in front of her. What kind of a friend is that? For me, that is enough to not want to be their friend. He doesn't respect the feelings of either one of you. She wants to be your friend so she can stalk you because she's worried that he will withdraw that choice and she's scrambling to make sure he keeps choosing her. Block her and him. This is too messy already. As you can imagine, this is making me laugh the classic evil laugh, cause tbh he was such a tool when he decided the grass must be greener elsewhere. A part of me thinks I want to be his friend simply because the feelings aren't gone. That's why I've been trying to distance myself - and I feel guilty even though I shouldn't. You're right though - I think she's trying to get closer to me simply because he is trying to get closer to me. Link to post Share on other sites
MissBee Posted November 17, 2015 Share Posted November 17, 2015 I think I speak for everyone when I say "WT actual F" on this one. For some reason, my ex-bf's new gf is trying to befriend me. Why? And does not wanting to be her friend in any way make me a bad person? I would decline. Unless you genuinely have no problem with this. But it sounds like you do, so I'd just ignore the request. It doesn't make you a bad person. I would NEVER friend a boyfriend's ex-gf....like why? Just say no. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author seeingthisguy Posted November 17, 2015 Author Share Posted November 17, 2015 I would decline. Unless you genuinely have no problem with this. But it sounds like you do, so I'd just ignore the request. It doesn't make you a bad person. I would NEVER friend a boyfriend's ex-gf....like why? Just say no. Thank you for saying that. The guilt was just eating at me! Link to post Share on other sites
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