Styles Jhonson Posted November 13, 2015 Share Posted November 13, 2015 So I met this girl on a website and we started talking with each other and we kinda hit it off easily. We've been dating for a over a year now but recently things have gotten complicated between us. I would talk to her almost everyday via text messaging and our conversation would last a for about a few hours in the afternoon, but I've noticed that they've gotten a lot shorter in the past few months. There were times in the past were she wouldn't text me right away and I would get worried because I didn't know if she was okay, but other than that our conversations would always end with a goodnight. Just a few days ago we were talking until all of a sudden she stopped replying to me. She had read the message, but she didn't reply to me so I waited to see if she would and then an hour later I sent her another one asking her if she had to go to sleep, but she didn't read the message right away. I thought I would just go to sleep instead and check to see if she would reply to me in the morning. But sure enough she had only read the message. I assumed maybe she got tired or distracted and forgot to reply back, but I wasn't sure if maybe she decided she didn't want to talk to me. I know I didn't say anything bad to her so I figure she couldn't be mad at me, but it's really not like her to just leave me hanging even if it's happened other times. I decided I wouldn't send her anymore messages for a two days, but I still haven't gotten anything from her. At first I was upset because she had left me, but now I'm starting to feel bad about having bothered her. I just don't know if she still might want to talk to me if I send her another message and I hate sending her double messages. I really need some advice from anyone who can help with this situation and I feel like I should leave her alone, but at the same time I don't want our relationship to be over. I love her so much and she's the best thing that's ever happened to me so I really don't want to lose her. The problem is we're not spending enough time time together like we used to and she keeps leaving me. Link to post Share on other sites
Silver_star Posted November 13, 2015 Share Posted November 13, 2015 I read somewhere that texting in relationships should be like tennis...back and forth with the communication. The ball is in her court so to speak. She obviously needs some space right now. For whatever reason. If you guys are actually in a relationship she should be communicating why she needs some space, but otherwise maybe she just needs a mental break. Who knows. If she wanted to talk to you she would though. It sucks, but go get busy with something else...it seems like you are more invested than she is at this point. go work on yourself. She may come around. If not, her loss. Link to post Share on other sites
handi Posted November 13, 2015 Share Posted November 13, 2015 What do ypu mean things have been complicated? That might give younan idea ofnehy she's not responding often. If she thinks your issues aren't being resolvednshe might distance herself slowly and fade out. Link to post Share on other sites
central Posted November 13, 2015 Share Posted November 13, 2015 I suspect that she's dating "real" people, not someone online. If you haven't met in person after all this time, you're not really dating at all - and never were, IMO. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
handi Posted November 13, 2015 Share Posted November 13, 2015 Oh I assumed they met in person. If not thenni agree with the person above. Physical interaction changes a lot. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Styles Jhonson Posted November 13, 2015 Author Share Posted November 13, 2015 I forgot to mention in my thread that we've video chatted a couple times, but otherwise she prefers to text instead because she doesn't want to get in trouble with her parents also she's only 16 and lives in Miami which is 3,000 miles from were I'am so it would be hard to meet her anytime soon although I'm hoping one day I'll go see her. Thanks for the replies. Link to post Share on other sites
schiller Posted November 13, 2015 Share Posted November 13, 2015 They've been dating a year and he's in love with her. Of course they met in person! Otherwise it wouldn't be real. Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted November 13, 2015 Share Posted November 13, 2015 I forgot to mention in my thread that we've video chatted a couple times, but otherwise she prefers to text instead because she doesn't want to get in trouble with her parents also she's only 16 and lives in Miami which is 3,000 miles from were I'am so it would be hard to meet her anytime soon although I'm hoping one day I'll go see her. Thanks for the replies. Wait...she's 16?? How old are you? And it's not a relationship until you actually meet. She's probably off doing what all teenage girls do..dating and having fun. Sorry OP but this is the reality of LDR that haven't gone further than viral. And the fact that she's so damn young!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Styles Jhonson Posted November 13, 2015 Author Share Posted November 13, 2015 I'm 18 and I intend on meeting her soon and btw she isn't dating anyone but me otherwise she would tell me. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted November 13, 2015 Share Posted November 13, 2015 I'm 18 and I intend on meeting her soon and btw she isn't dating anyone but me otherwise she would tell me. Hah and you believe that? It's so easy to get away with it. She can easily be out with her girlies being swooped down on by guys at school, or the mall. Internet relationships are 20% reality and 80% fantasy. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
J21 Posted November 13, 2015 Share Posted November 13, 2015 (edited) Unless you guys have actually met IN PERSON, this isn't a "real" relationship. Sorry to break it to ya but it's just a "virtual relationship". Facetime doesn't count as physically meeting, still just virtual. Edited November 13, 2015 by J21 2 Link to post Share on other sites
schiller Posted November 13, 2015 Share Posted November 13, 2015 The relationship is entirely in your head. You ever read stories about how people meet on a dating site, they chat and message for a while and then meet and there's no attraction? Humans need, they must have physical contact in order to know if they are compatible and attracted to each other. If you don't have that, you have nothing. It's just words on a screen. Did you ever read stories where guys think they're talking to young girls, and then they meet them and they find themselves on a "catch a predator" show? I once made up a profile on the POF dating site, downloaded a bunch of pictures of blondes, wasn't even the same girl in each one. Started chatting with guys, one of them actually drove to a nearby mall to "have sex with the hot blonde he was chatting with" another poor sob actually fell in love with me- it went on for weeks, then I got bored and "broke up with him". He was devastated. Again, to them it's real. But it's nothing more than words on a screen. Sure talking by phone is a "bit" better, at least then you know the gender of the person you're supposedly developing a relationship with. But it's a far cry from reality. It's time to get real. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted November 13, 2015 Share Posted November 13, 2015 I'm 18 and I intend on meeting her soon and btw she isn't dating anyone but me otherwise she would tell me. Sweetie, I don't want to be a negative Nelly or burst your bubble but adults in LDR can't even escape the massive and countless pitfalls that plague online relationships never mind impressionable and easily distracted teenagers. Deception and empty promises are just two of the major issues that WILL haunt you. It's a very difficult journey and very few people can navigate it well if at all. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Styles Jhonson Posted November 13, 2015 Author Share Posted November 13, 2015 Well it turns out she got her phone tooken away the same night we were talking, but she didn't tell me until I saw she sent me a private message. Link to post Share on other sites
angel.eyes Posted November 13, 2015 Share Posted November 13, 2015 Ah! The joys of chatting with a sixteen-year old! At least she isn't grounded too. Styles, why aren't you trying to find someone local? Girls in your classes? Girls that you meet when out with your friends? Girls you meet through your job if you have one? Start there. You're more likely to find an actual girlfriend that way. You're setting yourself up for heartache and disappointment when you chat/text with teenagers 3000 miles away. Unless you're planning to go to college in Miami (assuming she's told you the truth about where she lives), you'll never see each other frequently enough to turn this into a real relationship. Sixteen and eighteen-year olds don't have the resources or cash to engage in frequent visits over that distance. It's just a fantasy. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 OP, how exactly are you in a relationship if you've never even been on one date? This isn't a relationship, not in the way you think it is. It's a text buddy. She clearly is losing interest in this arrangement. Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 The relationship is entirely in your head. You ever read stories about how people meet on a dating site, they chat and message for a while and then meet and there's no attraction? Humans need, they must have physical contact in order to know if they are compatible and attracted to each other. If you don't have that, you have nothing. It's just words on a screen. Did you ever read stories where guys think they're talking to young girls, and then they meet them and they find themselves on a "catch a predator" show? I once made up a profile on the POF dating site, downloaded a bunch of pictures of blondes, wasn't even the same girl in each one. Started chatting with guys, one of them actually drove to a nearby mall to "have sex with the hot blonde he was chatting with" another poor sob actually fell in love with me- it went on for weeks, then I got bored and "broke up with him". He was devastated. Again, to them it's real. But it's nothing more than words on a screen. Sure talking by phone is a "bit" better, at least then you know the gender of the person you're supposedly developing a relationship with. But it's a far cry from reality. It's time to get real. LOL. You're the type of guy the 'Catfish' guys on TV always uncover. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts