ZA Dater Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 I was really with you until I read this.. Was following and thought you were going to say "if the person I'm going after rejects me then I'm going to close the book on her and focus my energy on exploring other options because I can't continue to invest so much time and hope in someone who doesn't view me the same way I view her".... And was going to high five you until I saw you went the complete opposite route and plan on giving up dating completely just because one woman who you feel is perfect for you doesn't have the same emotions toward you.....what's the good in that? You know that you're just going to eventually say to yourself that you wanna give it another shot and even admit your style changes are getting u more attention. Why start over for no reason just because K isn't Into you? Way I see it there is so very few people I genuinely like that if this doesn't work out I can quite easily walk away because its so seldom I meet anyone I am interested in. Age isn't making me any more desirable, if anything inexperience with age makes me considerably less desirable. Its easy to sit and say oh there are other, when in fact there are not, its yet more difficult to look back and see one has had NO discernible success EVER at dating, in other words there is no real motivation to continue when every single time one is rejected and please don't tell me everyone gets rejected because I have yet to meet a slim, athletic 31 yo who has not been kissed or had a gf. People don't understand what its like to carry that baggage around. Link to post Share on other sites
ZA Dater Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 (edited) I'd rather a woman be honest up front and tell the guy that she isn't interested. Kill any thoughts of romance IMMEDIATELY. The longer it goes on, the worse it gets. It isn't because of one woman, it's because of many women over time. This one is the straw that broke the camel's back. ZA Dater should be done with this crap, if no woman is giving him the time of day. Drop worrying about women like a bad habit and focus that energy on actual feasible goals within his reach. There is a lot of sense in the above and one of the contributors to the high number of single guys/inexperienced/virgin guys is the fact that females are not upfront and this subtle method for me at least is like a kick in the teeth, tell me to my face I am ugly, don't tell me "oh lets be friends, then block me on whatsapp" I can to an extent understand that large unfit people do battle more but I am not that, if anything I am gym fit, athletic, could hope on the road bike and cycle 65 miles right now. Again, one would need to get an idea as to the physical attributes of the guys who cant find anything. The world owes me nothing but I can make a choice as to what I like. How many of the virgin guys simply gave up? Why did they give up trust me if any of them went out with someone they liked, even if it didn't work that experience alone would give the motivation to continue. When you try and try, change things, try again and yet still find no success then really why bother continuing. I am on the "fix and try again" part of the programme. Edited December 8, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator fixed quote formatting ~6 Link to post Share on other sites
Heatherknows Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 IMO, shooting up places is rock bottom. There would have been no shame in this guy, who clearly could afford to, hiring out some human contact. It costs about the same as dating, so it's not like he would have been making any huge sacrifice. It would have saved people's lives. There is no shame in it. Prostitution for those 21 and over should be legal and taxed. But any man trafficking young girls should be castrated; this will be filmed and posted on youtube. Link to post Share on other sites
MGX Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 There is a lot of sense in the above and one of the contributors to the high number of single guys/inexperienced/virgin guys is the fact that females are not upfront and this subtle method for me at least is like a kick in the teeth, tell me to my face I am ugly, don't tell me "oh lets be friends, then block me on whatsapp" Women don't like being lied to either. It's like when a guy pretends to befriend a woman, when he really likes her. Sometimes a guy wouldn't have begun talking to her if he thought she wouldn't like him. I can to an extent understand that large unfit people do battle more but I am not that, if anything I am gym fit, athletic, could hope on the road bike and cycle 65 miles right now. Dude, FAT men can't get fat women. Losing weight is meaningless too. Dating is a screwed up game. You can win by not playing. Link to post Share on other sites
Heatherknows Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 Dating is a screwed up game. You can win by not playing. Good luck with that. Link to post Share on other sites
MGX Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 Good luck with that. I AM having luck with that. No more dealing with bull**** from the opposite sex. Put that energy into perfecting my goals and dreams. Link to post Share on other sites
ZA Dater Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 You can win by not playing. The problem is I cant. Tired of doing each and everything on my own, dinners on my own, social functions on my own, movies on my own, I don't think we as people are designed to function in a solitary situation. I can accept my fate if I was not a nice guy, thing is I am a nice guy, people ask for help and I drop everything to help them, people need someone to speak to, I am there, people need someone to vent to, I am there. I listed everything I am good at and all the qualities I bring and to me its a good list but apparently not enough to society at large. Link to post Share on other sites
ZA Dater Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 I AM having luck with that. No more dealing with bull**** from the opposite sex. Put that energy into perfecting my goals and dreams. That's great but for me and I am sure many more, there is nothing we would like more than to share experiences good and bad with someone. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Heatherknows Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 I AM having luck with that. No more dealing with bull**** from the opposite sex. Put that energy into perfecting my goals and dreams. If that works for you then fine. It sounds lonely to me. Link to post Share on other sites
ltjg45 Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 Dating is a screwed up game. You can win by not playing. No. All you do by not playing is making sure you can't lose. And that is not the same as winning. My response to the screwed up dating game is to find new avenues to look for potential partners. For me, the entire world is available to me. Why stop to just the women in the U.S. when there is foreign women that is more than available? And no, I don't want to hear about this mail order bride BS either...... I would give the same advice to women. Go look for foreign guys if American ones annoy and piss you off. I certainly wouldn't blame you if you do. Link to post Share on other sites
MGX Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 The problem is I cant. Tired of doing each and everything on my own, dinners on my own, social functions on my own, movies on my own, I don't think we as people are designed to function in a solitary situation. I can accept my fate if I was not a nice guy, thing is I am a nice guy, people ask for help and I drop everything to help them, people need someone to speak to, I am there, people need someone to vent to, I am there. I listed everything I am good at and all the qualities I bring and to me its a good list but apparently not enough to society at large. That's great but for me and I am sure many more, there is nothing we would like more than to share experiences good and bad with someone. Then get some buddies to hang with. Better than moping on LS over chicks who don't like you. If that works for you then fine. It sounds lonely to me. It's only lonely if you're horny or constantly obsessed over the mushy stuff you don't have. If I want companionship, I have a parent. I have friends. Link to post Share on other sites
ZA Dater Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 Then get some buddies to hang with. Better than moping on LS over chicks who don't like you. It's only lonely if you're horny or constantly obsessed over the mushy stuff you don't have. If I want companionship, I have a parent. I have friends. I cant take buddies to black tie dinner and dances. Link to post Share on other sites
MGX Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 No. All you do by not playing is making sure you can't lose. And that is not the same as winning. I beg to differ. Not playing means I don't deal with the crap that most people have to deal with. I'm free from those things and found enjoyment elsewhere. My response to the screwed up dating game is to find new avenues to look for potential partners. For me, the entire world is available to me. Why stop to just the women in the U.S. when there is foreign women that is more than available? And no, I don't want to hear about this mail order bride BS either...... I would give the same advice to women. Go look for foreign guys if American ones annoy and piss you off. I certainly wouldn't blame you if you do. That opens yourself to a whole new set of problems. Now there are geographical and cultural barriers to overcome. Language too. And then you'd have to deal with the same mess that you were trying to escape! Exotic crap is still crap. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MGX Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 I cant take buddies to black tie dinner and dances. Sex and romance, you mean. You can take your friends to dinner at any restaurant you want. Hell, you can take them to the movies and chances those are movies that you would want to actually watch without compromise. Link to post Share on other sites
ZA Dater Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 Sex and romance, you mean. You can take your friends to dinner at any restaurant you want. Hell, you can take them to the movies and chances those are movies that you would want to actually watch without compromise. I cannot take them to an office/corporate/formal dinner where everyone is partnered up. Link to post Share on other sites
MGX Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 I cannot take them to an office/corporate/formal dinner where everyone is partnered up. I'm sure that everyone in your office isn't paired up with someone else. Link to post Share on other sites
ZA Dater Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 I'm sure that everyone in your office isn't paired up with someone else. They all are, likewise the club I belong to. Link to post Share on other sites
MGX Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 They all are, likewise the club I belong to. Fine. Then your coworkers are your companions at such an affair. Link to post Share on other sites
ZA Dater Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 Fine. Then your coworkers are your companions at such an affair. Great and yes and after ABC number of years going alone you start to hear "oh is he gay". Lovely. Link to post Share on other sites
MGX Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 Great and yes and after ABC number of years going alone you start to hear "oh is he gay". Lovely. And you'd correct them with "No, I'm single and I don't suffer fools who waste my time." Link to post Share on other sites
Heatherknows Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 Great and yes and after ABC number of years going alone you start to hear "oh is he gay". Lovely. ZA maybe PM LW as ask him for some advice. If you're reasonably attractive and interesting any man can find a girlfriend. Here is my advice, which you can ignore: Realistically assess who you are and what you have to offer a female. The best looking, intelligent females have the most options. If you want them you better be the best and brightest and some of those traits are genetic. My feeling is you probably are only interested in the ones that don't want you and that is a recipe for failure. Link to post Share on other sites
Heatherknows Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 And you'd correct them with "No, I'm single and I don't suffer fools who waste my time." Please don't say this you'd sound bitter and depressing. Link to post Share on other sites
MGX Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 Please don't say this you'd sound bitter and depressing. Quite the contrary...I think that's a perfectly good response to ignorantly assuming one's sexuality due to their lack of a visible relationship. "Oh, he's alone, so he MUST be gay." I would be pissed at my co-workers for making such childish assumptions, when all they could have done was asked. Link to post Share on other sites
WaitingForBardot Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 And you'd correct them with "No, I'm single and I don't suffer fools who waste my time." If you actually didn't suffer fools, you wouldn't bother to respond. Link to post Share on other sites
MGX Posted December 8, 2015 Share Posted December 8, 2015 If you actually didn't suffer fools, you wouldn't bother to respond. I was referring about the dating situation, not the co-workers at the party in that instance. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts