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Should I warn her?


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Honeybear12345

In my gut, I know he's a player. He's sweet-talked me before then dropped me just like a hot potato. Now he's dating a new girl (they've been dating for 2 months) and seems like he's all into her and over her, but I know that he'll drop her just like he did me.

 

Problem is, I still have feelings for him; at the same time, I feel like I should warn her. I think he knows I still like him (though I know he's no good; and I think she knows that I like him, too), but I'm not sure if she'll think I'm trying to break the two of them up if I try to warn her. I know him well, but I don't know her at all so it might come across like I'm trying to get him back. . .

 

Should I just let the scene play out, or try to warn her? Am I just being jealous and a love-sick puppy dog?

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Do not get involved. It's not your place and she won't listen anyways. Think about if it was the other way around and she told you he was a player and to be careful.... You'd say "ok thanks for the heads up" then roll your eyes and think she's a jealous clingy girl who doesn't want to see him with anyone but her... And then you'd go out with him anyways.

 

 

You will only look bad by saying anything to her. Don't.

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In my gut, I know he's a player. He's sweet-talked me before then dropped me just like a hot potato. Now he's dating a new girl (they've been dating for 2 months) and seems like he's all into her and over her, but I know that he'll drop her just like he did me.

 

Problem is, I still have feelings for him; at the same time, I feel like I should warn her. I think he knows I still like him (though I know he's no good; and I think she knows that I like him, too), but I'm not sure if she'll think I'm trying to break the two of them up if I try to warn her. I know him well, but I don't know her at all so it might come across like I'm trying to get him back. . .

 

Should I just let the scene play out, or try to warn her? Am I just being jealous and a love-sick puppy dog?

 

but I know that he'll drop her just like he did me. -- Unless you have a crystal ball, you don't know he'll drop her.

 

Your gut is telling you he is/was a player -- what real evidence do you have of that? And, how long did you date him? -- I know him well

 

We don't know all the details behind him having "dropped you like a hot potato", but how do you know he won't like her enough to keep moving forward with her.

 

I wouldn't meddle in their relationship. She's an adult and will find out in due time what's what with this guy. And, you may very well come off as a jealous ex if you attempt to intervene.

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You don't care what happens to her, you just want to mess things up with him because you are pissed at him still....we are not stupid here, we know what is motivating you to want to do this....hurt and jealousy.

 

How about this....mind your own business, and try to move on before you make a fool of yourself. You will be accused of being the bat sh it crazy ex GF. You sure don't want that title do you??

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In my gut, I know he's a player. He's sweet-talked me before then dropped me just like a hot potato. Now he's dating a new girl (they've been dating for 2 months) and seems like he's all into her and over her, but I know that he'll drop her just like he did me.

 

Problem is, I still have feelings for him; at the same time, I feel like I should warn her. I think he knows I still like him (though I know he's no good; and I think she knows that I like him, too), but I'm not sure if she'll think I'm trying to break the two of them up if I try to warn her. I know him well, but I don't know her at all so it might come across like I'm trying to get him back. . .

 

Should I just let the scene play out, or try to warn her? Am I just being jealous and a love-sick puppy dog?

 

 

Please don't get involved and let their relationship play itself out. If you insert yourself into it, chances are it will blow up in your face. Simply put, you have an ulterior motive that Stevie Wonder could see a mile away. So with perception being realty, they will be able to see right through it and you will come out looking like a Bunny Boiler. And you don't want that. So just let them be.

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Players can change....but even if he doesn't you need to leave them be. She'll find out what he's like the same way you did.

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It's not your problem, OP.

 

Mind your business and carry on with your life. Contacting her to issue some type of warning will make you look desperate and bitter.

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OP,

 

Totally agree with the others.

 

First, she will not believe you, and frankly, not sure if we believe you either. We don't know of your relationship with him, and perhaps it just wasn't to be. We don't know if he's a player, good guy or bad guy. They may be together forever.

 

You've been given good advise.... stay away.

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Leave it alone. Like everyone previously said, she won't believe you, and you will look like you are hung up on him. Interfering. Do you want them both to perceive you as sad and pathetic? I didn't think so.

 

He most likely (99% probability) will mess her around the same as he did you. She will learn the hard way. Serial cheaters, players and sc*mb*gs do not change their MO ....or their nature. Their ways are deeply ingrained and they always revert to form.

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acrosstheuniverse

Say nothing. New girl will just laugh at it and think you're jealous clingy ex who won't go away and wants to cause problems to get him back for yourself, and by the sounds of it she'd be right on the money.

 

I got an anonymous message from a girl when I started dating a new guy a couple years ago, saying blah blah he's a cheat, treats girls bad, if you don't believe me talk to *ex gf* etc. etc.' I actually didn't find it until after we'd stopped dating, my choice, but he was a perfectly lovely guy who's gone on to have a great new relationship and treated me like a queen and wanted to commit. Honestly I laughed at how desperate someone must be to try and inject themselves into someone's new relationship!

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If he was actually cheating and you knew this then I would say yes say something. Or if this other girl was an actual friend of yours I would say yes warn her. Since the girl is a stranger and you don't know if he has done anything wrong..this comes off as desperate.

 

If you know he is a player then why do you still have feelings for him? What particularly about this player makes you like him? Is it his playing you or the fact he is now with another girl? What qualities does he have to make you want him I am sure a lot of single men want to know what he is doing to keep you so into him despite his treatment of you. Surely you aren't into men who are shady and treat you bad so tell us what he is doing to keep you interested.

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