IhavenoFREAKINclue Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Originally posted by EC Well guess what ya gave me a reason! SO now when I bitch and complain and ask him a million questions he can't say i don't have a reason. Damn Straight!!!!! I think its the worst feeling when you have that uneasy feeling that something could be going on behind your back. I think you need closure and do what pocky said. Call her BF and get s*** straightened out. I'm sure her BF has no idea what she does (obviously) but I'm sure he'd be more than happy to find out! Link to post Share on other sites
SexKitten Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 "i'm sure you'll make it more interesting." that's all i would need to see. and i've said this once and i'll say it again...it drives me crazy when people say "i didn't tell you because you would get mad!" all that means is "i put my own feelings ahead of yours because you would have gotten in the way of what i wanted to do." good luck, EC. this sounds like more of a problem than i think you're letting yourself realize. look at it as though it's someone else's post...do you think you would give them the same advice, to ignore it and that it's not a problem? Link to post Share on other sites
Author EC Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 look at it as though it's someone else's post...do you think you would give them the same advice, to ignore it and that it's not a problem? Im not going to ignore it. I didnt ignore it. I flipped out on him told him how I felt, he gave me his side, I spoke to her and all she said was how wonderful he spoke of me. I mean I have done all I can. He does treat me prefect and this is his first real f*** up. And if thats the worst I mean then Im getting off good compared to other LS stories. I know either way its still an issue but I will have to wait until he moves down to work through it. He called a while ago and said he is going out tonight for his birthday to a club because he can get it at 12:00 tonight since he will be 21 tonight. He gave me the list of who was going ( 2 guy friends from school ) because they are the only ones that are 21. He can't go out tomorrow because he has a test thursday morning. So I'm ok with that. He said he would call me before and after he got out. Still there is doubt. Link to post Share on other sites
newble Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Originally posted by EC Oh I told him. I told him i trusted him 99% and that now he brought it down to like 76! You'll be fine when it's 69. Link to post Share on other sites
Author EC Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 "i put my own feelings ahead of yours because you would have gotten in the way of what i wanted to do." So true. He loves you, and he treats you well...Try to let this one go - ALLOW him to make it up to you BIG TIME. He better or I'll come kick his ass! He doens't wanna mess with a pissed off redhead! Well he did make it up that night. Best head I have ever gotten. Best make up sex of my life. lol Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Oh, EC, what a bummer. especially seeing as how you've put SO much time and effort into this LDR. He has to realize that he broke the trust that you two had. He destroyed part of the foundation of your relationship. The damage needs to be repaired by him. Giving him concrete and consistent consequences will help in this process. As long as you don't just smooth everything over and let him forget about it. Men can be such dumbasses sometimes. The bloodflow to their penis impedes logical thought and rational decision making. Link to post Share on other sites
Author EC Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 Oh, EC, what a bummer. especially seeing as how you've put SO much time and effort into this LDR. He has to realize that he broke the trust that you two had. He destroyed part of the foundation of your relationship. The damage needs to be repaired by him. Giving him concrete and consistent consequences will help in this process. As long as you don't just smooth everything over and let him forget about it. Men can be such dumbasses sometimes. The bloodflow to their penis impedes logical thought and rational decision making. Seriously!!! He did break trust and so he better party his a$$ off for these three weeks because once he moves down theres no going back. I AM GOING TO BE ALL UP IN HIS KOOLAIDE! Hes not going to be able to get away with sh*t. Lets hope for the best. Link to post Share on other sites
SexKitten Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 well, in any case i hope it works out. Link to post Share on other sites
prisoner Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Look, this guy is making your life miserable. No matter how many times he makes up for it. No matter how many times you tolerate and forgive him. There is not turning back the clock. He has hidden things from you. Lied to you. Dismissed you. He has basically underwhelmed you by saying he 'wasted' (your words) money being with you. He chooses his friends over you. Drinking. Other women. What else does he have to choose before you realise you are an OPTION for him and he is a PRIORITY for you. harsh I know but getting this point across can be very difficult sometimes. There is a bright and wonderful world out there with out this clown in your life. Protect yourself. Save yourself. Walk away. Today. Link to post Share on other sites
Author EC Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 There is a bright and wonderful world out there with out this clown in your life. With all the bad thats going on in my life right now..I feel he is the bright and wonderful in my world. Pathetic I know. I can't walk away. I feel as If I have waited and worked to hard to walk away when hes moving down in three weeks and we will finally be together. When we hugged goodbye this time and kissed he looked in my eyes and said cheer up because guess what? This is the last time we have to hug and say good bye. Its finally over. I can't just walk away from that. Link to post Share on other sites
prisoner Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 I hope you get what you want. Link to post Share on other sites
Author EC Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 I hope you get what you want. Sigh...I hope so too. Link to post Share on other sites
prisoner Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 the world is bigger than one person. than one post. than one thought. than one song. than one hug. one look. one kiss. many kisses. many hugs. the lovemaking. the good times. the bad times. the future. the world is bogger than the future because the world goes forwadr all at once. If you have the slightest inkling that you are not moving forward with the other six point two billion people on the planet walk away. whenever that is. wherever that is. if you do not get what you want. walk away. I can understand that you want to give it a chance after the effort but you have been disappointed before. I think you should let him know that the disappointment stage is over and he either makes the grade or hits the road. Link to post Share on other sites
Author EC Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 the world is bigger than one person. than one post. than one thought. than one song. than one hug. one look. one kiss. many kisses. many hugs. the lovemaking. the good times. the bad times. the future. the world is bogger than the future because the world goes forwadr all at once. If you have the slightest inkling that you are not moving forward with the other six point two billion people on the planet walk away. whenever that is. wherever that is. if you do not get what you want. walk away. I can understand that you want to give it a chance after the effort but you have been disappointed before. I think you should let him know that the disappointment stage is over and he either makes the grade or hits the road. Prisoner thank you for listening. I understand completely what you are saying. Life is way to short to waste your time. I really am not making excuses for him but all the disappointments have been because of the stupid distance and so I feel I owe a chance to us when he moves down. Now once he moves down..there is no room for disappointment. And your absolutely right either he makes the grade or he will hit the road head first and I will back over him once or twice. I will not repeat my past mistakes with him and stick around trying to make it work and suffering along the way. Or over looking certain things. Either you are bringing me the whole package or I am leaving. He knows this. And I'm not fooling. I will walk away if he does move down and I feel its going no where. But at least then I'll know I gave it my all and gave us a chance. Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Hey now! EC hasn't exactly been a walk in the park either. She did just up and dump the poor guy with the ubiquitous line, "I need space." Link to post Share on other sites
Author EC Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 I did need it..it lasted for like three days though. And I didnt dump him we went on break. lol Link to post Share on other sites
prisoner Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 i gave you your own advice. professionals steal. you know what Pocky? that may be true but if he wants advocates and support then he can get on to LS and reconcile. At least she is trying. and while that may be a 'ubiquitous' line, space is a very personal thing. maybe the 'poor guy' deserved it as equally as EC deserves to want the space in the first place. you don't come up for air unless you are having trouble breathing. Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Originally posted by prisoner you know what Pocky? that may be true but if he wants advocates and support then he can get on to LS and reconcile. At least she is trying. From my understanding he is trying as well. He's showering her with verbal affection. He's trying to make up for his mistake. and while that may be a 'ubiquitous' line, space is a very personal thing. maybe the 'poor guy' deserved it as equally as EC deserves to want the space in the first place. you don't come up for air unless you are having trouble breathing. Don't get too serious. As you can see the thread is really lighthearted even with the anger EC feels from what he did. My comment was a tease for EC and she apparently understood that. I really don't see that she started this thread as a, "Should I dump my boyfriend" thread. EC isn't being melodramatic - I'm very proud of her and how she's maturing. Don't be melodramatic for her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author EC Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 I love how they talk as if I'm not even in the room. lol But lets not jump on prisoner. He was just giving his view. My bf has been trying I will give him that and in return I am improving on being a total attention whore and drama queen. Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Originally posted by EC I love how they talk as if I'm not even in the room. Who are you again? But lets not jump on prisoner. He was just giving his view. My bf has been trying I will give him that and in return I am improving on being a total attention whore and drama queen. I'm not jumping on him - I'm just pointing out that while he is having a very serious conversation with you, I'm following a different path - one with sarcastic comments infused with . I was just clarifying that it isn't necessary to turn part of my lighthearted conversation into a serious debate. Link to post Share on other sites
Author EC Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 I'm not jumping on him - I'm just pointing out that while he is having a very serious conversation with you, I'm following a different path - one with sarcastic comments infused with . I was just clarifying that it isn't necessary to turn part of my lighthearted conversation into a serious debate. gotcha! Link to post Share on other sites
BrotherAaron Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 EC you really are a magnet for the female perspective... but where are did all the LS men go? Anyway, he didn't cheat, he probably wasn't going to, and you have this guy scared s***less you're gonna dump him. I think you're ok. Link to post Share on other sites
Author EC Posted May 31, 2005 Author Share Posted May 31, 2005 EC you really are a magnet for the female perspective... but where are did all the LS men go? Anyway, he didn't cheat, he probably wasn't going to, and you have this guy scared s***less you're gonna dump him. I think you're ok. HAHA you made me laugh out loud. They need to get scared sometimes. Where did all the men go I would really love to hear Alphas point of view. Someone Pm him for me my pm isn't working. Link to post Share on other sites
tanbark813 Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Originally posted by EC Where did all the men go Do I not count? I personally think that showering with verbal affection is in no way directly tied with innocence, and most likely the opposite. The exes that cheated on me were great with make-up affection. Why do you think I stuck it out for so long? Anyhoo.. I'm also jaded and sunburned from the weekend. Link to post Share on other sites
Pocky Posted May 31, 2005 Share Posted May 31, 2005 Originally posted by tanbark813 Do I not count? I personally think that showering with verbal affection is in no way directly tied with innocence, and most likely the opposite. The exes that cheated on me were great with make-up affection. Why do you think I stuck it out for so long? Anyhoo.. I'm also jaded and sunburned from the weekend. It's an LDR - the only option they currently have is verbal affection, you banana! (And yes, days later, the banana comment is still funny). Link to post Share on other sites
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