GreySkyMorning Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 I just got engaged to the man i met online after breaking up with MM. We are getting married October 16. I've never loved someone like this before. He means the world to me and shows me how he feels about me every day. There is life after MM if you take that chance to get what you really deserve. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
What_Did_I_Do Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 Back when a single OM, I had no issues dating. I was looking for a life partner and a woman who presented herself as available, regardless of relationship status, in that demographic at that time was fair game. MW's weren't currently available for exclusive relationships so it was treated like any other non-exclusive dating interaction, meaning I socialized with whomever I found attractive, asked out on dates and who said yes. Things went from there. Carhill, we may be in the same camp. Although I "love" MM, I'm keeping that door open just in case. Sounds a bit narcissistic for sure..but he isn't exactly available. Though he's recently amped up the future talk, where we'll live, who will do what chores etc. - likely because I've become somewhat interested in seeing who or what else is out there. Not only that, but certain single gentlemen are making an open bid for me right in front of him. Love it ;-) Dilemma though, I've been invited to a long time male friend's house for a hot tub tomorrow. Wouldn't date this man but might be ok for drinks. I think if things went 'further' I'd feel like I was cheating on MM. Ugh..how messed up is that. Also am doing OLD. I'm single and attractive ... so why not? Link to post Share on other sites
Brandyundercover45 Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 When I first reconnected with MM, I couldn't even contemplate having anyone else in my life. I was completely immersed in him and in our R. About a year ago, when things started to head south, I made the decision that I was being unfair for myself. I'm the single person here, not him. If he wants to stay in a crappy M, that's his choice. But I can make different choices. I have been dating since that time. Mostly "one-offs", and nothing serious/sexual. One thing I've learned is to keep that on ice till I start seeing someone seriously. But it's hard, because I keep comparing everyone to MM. No one seems to match up. No one's even close. At times, I feel like I'm doomed to settle for less. There aren't many single guys 40+ out there that fit my criteria, either. That's another problem. What about the rest of you? If you've ended the A, are you dating? If you're still in an A, do you keep your options open? I'm married and my OM is also married, so maybe that doesn't count. But I've been a single OW, and it sucks. You are always left lonely and wanting more while he's at home with the wife doing God knows what. I don't see anything wrong with dating as long as you keep it open and be ready to leave the MM if a relationship with someone else starts to get serious. I don't know that I would tell someone I'm dating that I'm the side-piece for a married man. I don't think that will go down very well, so you may want to think about it before taking that advice. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 I just got engaged to the man i met online after breaking up with MM. We are getting married October 16. I've never loved someone like this before. He means the world to me and shows me how he feels about me every day. There is life after MM if you take that chance to get what you really deserve. Congratulations. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BeautifulIdiot Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 Please don't push yourself to do that. You don't sound ready. It's not fair to the man you date. Poppy. Poppy - You were right. I couldn't go. You are a wise woman. Turns out I am not ready to date and everything I said around that subject was a lie. More healing to do for me yet but I'm sure I will get there. Eventually. One day. Right? It feels like it's been long enough, that I should be past it now so hopefully I'll wake up one day and my head will be clear and I'll be moving on. Then I'll date. Link to post Share on other sites
GoldenAxe Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 Very receptive here Link to post Share on other sites
Rocci di Persia Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 Having said my sad spiel above, I created an online profile on POF last night for the very first time. Scary stuff but I'm already feeling heaps better and thinking and caring about xAP less. Link to post Share on other sites
eye of the storm Posted January 12, 2016 Share Posted January 12, 2016 I tried to date an old friend, that I used to date, and...we are still really good friends but the dating was so weird and awkward this time. We decided to go back to friends only. I signed up for OLD, and I hate it. I feel like I am cheating on my MM. I want to call my MM and complain about this feeling, but, I am doing my best to only talk to him about work stuff until he either actually does get a divorce or I get tired of waiting (same time frame). So for those that are dating, kudos. I hope to be there soon. For those like me who are still having trouble...Ill pour the wine. Link to post Share on other sites
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