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Posted
Just out of curiosity, how are you seeing these statements?

 

I read some text messages that posted online from his phone . . . Not a good thing to do when you are trying to move on

Posted

How are you feeling? Are you maintaining NC?

  • Author
Posted

I have not had contact for five days. I have not called him. He will not call me since he has moved on.

 

Very rough weekend for me. I finished my Christmas shopping and kept seeing things that he and I had already purchased for Christmas together to give to my children. I had purchased items for him and had already given him a few gifts for him to use so, of course, when I saw those items in stores it brought up memories (memories of events that occurred less than two months ago). I literally had crying fits in the vehicle driving from one place to another.

 

I know that the next few days will be difficult because I will be wrapping the gifts we bought together to give to my children (of course they will be gifts from me only now as I will not mention his name).

 

I have many down moments . . . I am trying very hard to push through them because those moments are so draining and seem to cause me to slide backwards.

Posted (edited)

Cloudyhead, I am glad that you are pushing through the pain. It's easy for people to say things like "move on", focus on yourself", "MM is a jerk", etc. there's no real formula to move past this stage as everyone handles grief in different ways. Let yourself feel what you feel... It's all really fresh still. If you need to have a good cry, do it.

 

You don't see it right now, but I promise you it will get better. It's been about 6 weeks of strict NC for me. It was not an overnight process for me and I still have moments where I really miss things, but the searing pain became more dull as the days went by and something in me somehow switched off that longing. Hang in there! Enjoy your kids and when they are overjoyed with the lovely presents you got them, you will smile so hard and remember how lucky you are to have such joy in your life :)

Edited by Lovetoohard
  • 2 weeks later...
Posted
"I wish I'd met you first"

 

I heard that as we were ending.

 

Same. I just never realised it was an ending line until this past week and reading this.

  • Like 1
Posted

It is nice to see so many reflecting on this and realizing that MM was a manipulator at worst and spineless at best.

 

I hope that you all move on to healthy, non-toxuc relationships.

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