Attracted to much younger women

[lino]

Go for whatever woman you want.

 

There was a regular on here some time back who got married to a guy 20 odd years her junior and virtual high fives were flying all round.

 

Some of the now older female members are also ones who got with older guys in their youth for financial benefits and now berate others doing it because they can't do it anymore.

 

Do what you want and never let nay sayers and hypocrites put you off your path.

 

I've only ever been into women around my age but would never scorn a person who wants to date much older or younger.

[CTRL C]

Go for whatever woman you want.

 

There was a regular on here some time back who got married to a guy 20 odd years her junior and virtual high fives were flying all round.

 

Some of the now older female members are also ones who got with older guys in their youth for financial benefits and now berate others doing it because they can't do it anymore.

 

Do what you want and never let nay sayers and hypocrites put you off your path.

 

I've only ever been into women around my age but would never scorn a person who wants to date much older or younger.

 

Thing is, I'm not reading that he knows what he wants. If younger women are his thing? That's fine, just be upfront about it. What I'm reading so far is that he is looking for - or thinks he's looking for - women who share his beliefs/values, and he's decided that only the younger women do that.

 

Just pick a priority - the substance or the age - and own it.

[Vilgefoz]

Everyone knows what this is really about. He wants a hot young girl.

So start working out, and get a career. (Then dump her when she get too old for you)

 

Seriously, it's probably because you're seeing pretty young girls in the media all the time, and a lack of dating/relationship experience.

 

 

yes, exactly!

 

I can't understand how any old person, such as 27 or 36 can be attracted to younger women. Except for biological explanation, evolutionary reasons, cultural preferences, historical evidence, own feelings feelings of the younger girl...

 

Anyway, it's horribly creepy and despicable. Such people should hide under their bad and stay there!

 

Now, almighty LoveShack God, did I please you enough by spreading your Teaching or do I need to preach some more?

 

( I sincerely hope nobody is offended. We all have our own sense of humour )

[clia]

I'm 36 years old and when it comes to dating I don't find myself very attracted to women my age. In fact I find that I am attracted to women between 18 and 25 years old. I feel like I have so much more in common with them then I do women my age. However, society says it's wrong and we shouldn't date anyone that much younger. I really don't know what to do. When I try to talk to younger women they brush me off. I don't have a lot going for me. My health isn't the best and I am over weight. I feel like I will be one of the forever alone. Any advice that could help?

 

Just a note: I am working on losing the weight and taking better care of myself.

 

So, these young women don't want to date you, since by your own admission they "brush you off." Have you ever gone on a date with a woman aged 18 to 25 years old, in say, the past three years? Is this even a realistic goal for you to date a woman of this age? (There are dudes on this site who are your age or older, who do date women in the 18-25 year old age frame, but they have a lot going for them.)

 

Look, they are of legal age, so if you want to go for it, go for it. But as an old, overweight guy, you better have a lot to offer, like a great sense of humor, money, wit, charisma, etc. Otherwise, girls that age aren't going to have any interest in dating an old man. (And yes, to a girl in their teens and 20s, mid-30s is old AF.)

[oldshirt]

If someone is a legal adult, sound mind, sober and you are honest about your age, abilities and station in life, then it is all under the umbrella of consenting adults and no one can really say anything about it.

 

 

Your weight and appearance are obviously going to be major factors and potentially major impediments to women that have their pick of 20something jocks and athletes and corporate up-and-comers.

 

 

Regardless of what age bracket youre interested in, you are still going to have to be competitive and be the best option available to whom ever it is that you are interested in.

 

 

often the reason full adult men pursue young women isn't simply that they are firmer and prettier. It is because mature women can see through their crap and know that they are a bad egg.

 

 

Younger women haven't quite caught on to them yet (naivete') and think that the older men are pursuing them because they are firmer and prettier than women the man's age and so they think they are getting a good deal at the time.

 

 

Once they see through the façade and the crap, then they wise up fast and then they become the wise, mature woman. Dealing with older predators is kind of right of passage for women.

 

 

So, bottom line is there is nothing inherently illegal about dating young adult women that have reached the age of consent. But you are going to encounter societal stigmas that are biased against it because so many of those relationships are predatorial in nature and it is often the young women that end up getting screwed over and end up burning up their pretty years on losers who women their own age won't touch with a ten foot pole.

 

 

In the end it all comes down to what kind of man you really are. If you are an immature man-child that has never grown up or if you are a loser that can't hold a job and have drug/alcohol problems or have been abusive, adulterous or exploitive in previous relationships, you're going to have a rough road.

 

 

But if you are a kind hearted, decent, self-supporting, gainfully employed, sober person who treats people well and does have a fundamental respect and compassion for women, you will do ok. You will just have to work a little harder and do it better than everyone in order to overcome the stereotype and stigma attached to 30 year old men who chase young women.

[TheTraveler]

OP, you better get in shape. This is VERY important if you're trying to attract 18-25. Though I don't know why you would want someone under 21 at your age.

 

You better be interesting, at least be able to social drink, make a couple of dollars, and confident.

 

GL OP. Do what you want.

[edgygirl]

When I was 25 I thought 35 yo men hitting on me were... old. And creepy.

 

Although I think people should go after what they want, I'm trying to be honest here.

 

By your own admission, they are not biting. It seems you live in a place where 30 yo are wasted from drinking too much cause there's not much to do. But in large cities, 30 and 40 yo women still look pretty good. Open your horizons and you might find someone who suits your (physical) taste.

[Buddhist]

I feel like I have so much more in common with them then I do women my age.

 

I don't have a lot going for me. My health isn't the best and I am over weight. I feel like I will be one of the forever alone. Any advice that could help?

 

Just a note: I am working on losing the weight and taking better care of myself.

 

It's fine to be attracted to much younger people. It happens. But the reality is, if this is what you want then you need to be a match to it. And no, overweight with not much going for you isn't a match to it. Younger women who date older men, are generally looking for....

 

- Security, maturity, and of course, the fittest, most attractive and version of a 35yr old they can find. It's no easier to date younger, and in fact the competition is higher.

 

The only thing I find concerning here is that you state you feel you have more common with them. That's a worry because it screams....I'm immature as hell, or I feel like I didn't live my youth and want to go back there. I date younger than me by a significant degree, but it's not because I feel we have more common. In fact the generation divide is very apparent and a real challenge in these relationships. I quickly bore of the typically young person who just wants excitement all the time.

 

I date younger than me because men my own age are often married, divorced or have children and that isn't a lifestyle I want for myself and I need a partner who's as free to date and explore life as I am. It's hard to find in the over 40's, even in the over 30's. The kicker is though, I need to have a body in better shape than the average 20 something (not actually that hard these days, many of them are overweight) and every other aspect of my life more together. I have to be more mature in my relationships because drama-free, is the payoff someone gets in exchange for the age gap.

 

You don't seem to be offering that though, as I said, younger women who seek older men usually do so for the higher level of maturity and greater stability to the relationship as well as his capacity to commit. Otherwise, they would just date a hotter, younger guy and put up with all the crap that package brings. They certainly won't put up with it from an older less attractive guy.

[mightycpa]

I'm 36 years old and when it comes to dating I don't find myself very attracted to women my age. In fact I find that I am attracted to women between 18 and 25 years old. I feel like I have so much more in common with them then I do women my age. However, society says it's wrong and we shouldn't date anyone that much younger. I really don't know what to do. When I try to talk to younger women they brush me off. I don't have a lot going for me. My health isn't the best and I am over weight. I feel like I will be one of the forever alone. Any advice that could help?

 

Just a note: I am working on losing the weight and taking better care of myself.

You don't have to worry too much about what society says. Those young girls are the gatekeepers you need to worry about.

 

I'm curious, is it just the age? There are plenty of unattractive and seriously vapid 18 - 25 year olds who are hard up for company. Would they do? Or is there more to it?

[NewPerspective93]

You are an adult and if you pursue a relationship with someone younger, you'll probably get some naysayers about how you should date within your age, etc. If your partner and you want to pursue a relationship, none of those voices matter.

 

Do what you want (within reason and law), and forget what "society" says.

 

I know some couples in which the man is older than the woman and it never was an issue with them.

Edited December 26, 2015 by NewPerspective93