4blossoms Posted December 16, 2015 Share Posted December 16, 2015 (edited) There's a guy who works at my local bicycle shop. I first met him 2 months ago and got the feeling that he might like me. I saw him again last week and suddenly felt a lot of sparks! Today, I stopped by the store and asked if I could email him with questions about my bike. He said sure and gave me his email and personal website (he's a musician). Do you think he knows I like him? How do I encourage him to ask me out? Edited December 16, 2015 by 4blossoms Link to post Share on other sites
acrosstheuniverse Posted December 16, 2015 Share Posted December 16, 2015 You asked for his e-mail and he gave his personal e-mail to you, as well as his website... I'm sure he knows you like him! I'm guessing he doesn't have your e-mail yet. Just e-mail him asking a couple questions about his bike and mentioning something cool you like about his website (nothing too deep like oh I love this lyric in your song it means this to me blah blah, just something like 'wow, looks like you've been busy with touring!'). If he's interested, he'll ask you out. Good work so far! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author 4blossoms Posted December 16, 2015 Author Share Posted December 16, 2015 Thanks! I hope this goes well. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted December 16, 2015 Share Posted December 16, 2015 Good lord just ask him out for a drink already. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 4blossoms Posted December 18, 2015 Author Share Posted December 18, 2015 I got this message back from him. I don't know what to make of it and I don't want to directly ask him out on a date because (1) I already asked him for his email so he should already know I like him, (2) the last 10 guys I asked out rejected me, so my ego can't take this beating anymore. Here is his reply: Hey J =) So this would be my suggestion. You could either do mountain or road style bike pedals but I'd say mountain would be more practical for commuting. Here are some of the diffs... [Pro's and con's of different bike pedals, more stuff about what to pick...] If you like, I'm working Sunday and Monday and can show you the different pedals and shoes. Whenever you decide to purchase, I can show you how to set them up outside on my break or something. It's not all that difficult but good to know =) Thanks for checking out my music site and let me know if you have any other questions. -R I don't want to buy these items right now because it's going to be about $300 and too expensive for my budget. Does he sound like he has any interest in me? If so, what should I do? Link to post Share on other sites
Erik30 Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 His reply seems pretty formal and professional, so I guess the only way to be sure is to ask him out. He probably already knows you're interested 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author 4blossoms Posted December 18, 2015 Author Share Posted December 18, 2015 His reply seems pretty formal and professional, so I guess the only way to be sure is to ask him out. He probably already knows you're interested Formal and professional is a bad sign, isn't it? He's probably completely uninterested. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Glass Hut Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 Formal and professional is a bad sign, isn't it? He's probably completely uninterested. No it's not. He's representing his company and doesn't want to sound unprofessional and flirty in an email. You're going to need to keep trying to crack this nut. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 4blossoms Posted December 18, 2015 Author Share Posted December 18, 2015 (edited) No it's not. He's representing his company and doesn't want to sound unprofessional and flirty in an email. You're going to need to keep trying to crack this nut. What do you recommend to do next? (I'm so clueless...) Edited December 18, 2015 by 4blossoms Link to post Share on other sites
Glass Hut Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 What do you recommend to do next? (I'm so clueless...) I'm pretty clueless too but you said you didn't want to deal with any more rejection so you might want to ask him out quickly. If he says yes great, if he says no or doesn't reply, at least you're not very emotionally invested in the guy yet and you can just move on to the next. I'd just ask him if he wants to get a drink sometime. Keep it simple. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
loveflower Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 Since he already knows you are interested...then if he is interested he will ask you out. if he doesn't then he is not interested. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 How do you encourage a guy to ask you out? The obvious is you need to be attractive. If you are frumpy dumpy, don't like dolling yourself up with makeup, hair, show some cleavage, walk with confidence, be flirty, throw on some heels.....they won't be to interested in asking you out. Go get a make over. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
loveflower Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 How do you encourage a guy to ask you out? The obvious is you need to be attractive. If you are frumpy dumpy, don't like dolling yourself up with makeup, hair, show some cleavage, walk with confidence, be flirty, throw on some heels.....they won't be to interested in asking you out. Go get a make over. I need to keep this in mind as well. I often like tomboyish and lazy with dolling up. but that's how reality works I supposed? Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 I'm tomboyish too, and walk with a swagger BUT I'm also a fashionista. I blow people away when I dress feminine, and sexy. I have np switching a pair of Vans for some sexy heels. I learned from a very early age (I was an ugly duckling), you need to work on making yourself attractive for such a competitive market. Men are visual creatures....appearance comes first, and believe it or not, sexy eyes is what they notice first and long beautiful silky hair. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 Good lord just ask him out for a drink already. Smackie you remind me of Judge Judy. Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 Here's a suggestion: stop by one of the days he's available and tell him thanks for his advice and you'd like to treat him to coffee on his break for helping you out. If he declines, then it shouldn't be that big of a blow because you're asking him out as a way of saying thank you for his assistance. It's not like you're asking him out on a date. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 How do you encourage a guy to ask you out? The obvious is you need to be attractive. If you are frumpy dumpy, don't like dolling yourself up with makeup, hair, show some cleavage, walk with confidence, be flirty, throw on some heels.....they won't be to interested in asking you out. Go get a make over. For a second, I thought you were being facetious. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 4blossoms Posted December 18, 2015 Author Share Posted December 18, 2015 (edited) I'm pretty clueless too but you said you didn't want to deal with any more rejection so you might want to ask him out quickly. If he says yes great, if he says no or doesn't reply, at least you're not very emotionally invested in the guy yet and you can just move on to the next. I'd just ask him if he wants to get a drink sometime. Keep it simple. I hate waiting and I forgot that one out of the last 10 guys I asked out did want to date me. However, he just emailed me for 9 months and when he did finally ask me out I always felt like his backup plan. What a piece of #%!* he was and yet I didn't realize then that you can't give men the benefit of the doubt. If he is jerking you around and not asking you out on a date, then he is not interested enough to pursue you. I think I'm going to just reply back and thank him for the info and move on. Edited December 18, 2015 by 4blossoms Link to post Share on other sites
Author 4blossoms Posted December 18, 2015 Author Share Posted December 18, 2015 Here's a suggestion: stop by one of the days he's available and tell him thanks for his advice and you'd like to treat him to coffee on his break for helping you out. If he declines, then it shouldn't be that big of a blow because you're asking him out as a way of saying thank you for his assistance. It's not like you're asking him out on a date. This doesn't always work. I did this with another guy and he said yes to coffee. Over coffee we had a nice conversation mostly about work and not a single word about his girlfriend. I thought he was interested in me and later when I asked him out for dinner he blew me off saying "I don't think my girlfriend would like that". So, either some men are dense enough that they just don't "get it" or think it's fun to be a d*** and lead you on to stroke their ego. Link to post Share on other sites
Glass Hut Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 I hate waiting and I forgot that one out of the last 10 guys I asked out did want to date me. However, he just emailed me for 9 months and when he did finally ask me out I always felt like his backup plan. What a piece of #%!* he was and yet I didn't realize then that you can't give men the benefit of the doubt. If he is jerking you around and not asking you out on a date, then he is not interested enough to pursue you. I think I'm going to just reply back and thank him for the info and move on. That's not true. I am a guy and I've never asked out someone I just met. Except when I've been on vacation. Not everyone is very forward and guys can feel things out and slowly build up an attraction just like women do. Anyway, I personally wouldn't have asked out a random customer no matter how great she was. I wouldn't have the guts or even think of it. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author 4blossoms Posted December 18, 2015 Author Share Posted December 18, 2015 (edited) I just realized that the store where this guy works pays its sales staff a pretty generous commission. I was wondering why this guy's shirt and pants were kind of tight (he has a nice body) and why he was acting so flirtatious and interested in me but didn't seem to remember anything about me but everything about my bike. Now I know! Some people can stoop really, really low. Edited December 18, 2015 by 4blossoms Link to post Share on other sites
Erik30 Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 Yeah he could be in "sales mode" when you're talking to him, so definitely don't buy something just to be in touch with him. Not remembering anything about you is a bad sign. Whenever I like a girl, I remember the smallest details. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted December 18, 2015 Share Posted December 18, 2015 That's not true. I am a guy and I've never asked out someone I just met. Except when I've been on vacation. Not everyone is very forward and guys can feel things out and slowly build up an attraction just like women do. I'm not very forward even if I'm really into the girl. Takes me some time to work my way up to asking her out. The problem is there are women like OP who are impatient and if the guy doesn't move fast, they assume no interest and hate the guys guts. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 4blossoms Posted December 19, 2015 Author Share Posted December 19, 2015 He emailed me on a Friday night at midnight: I use road pedals myself to be honest. Even when I commute I don't dismount or walk very much so I'd recommend it! I calculated the commission on the sale if I did buy the bicycle parts and it's $13.75 lol. He must be really hard up for cash. Link to post Share on other sites
Author 4blossoms Posted December 19, 2015 Author Share Posted December 19, 2015 I'm not very forward even if I'm really into the girl. Takes me some time to work my way up to asking her out. The problem is there are women like OP who are impatient and if the guy doesn't move fast, they assume no interest and hate the guys guts. Ok, fair enough. You might be right. I'll chill out and wait to see what happens. Link to post Share on other sites
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