30 and starting to look my age... how to cope?

[hellohellohello]

Until recently, I dressed like a college kid and could easily pass for one. The last few months have been rough though, and maybe I wasn't taking care of myself. So anyway, I recently took a look at my face in the mirror and realized I look... my age. I can maybe pass for being in my mid-20s, but mostly I think I look like I'm in my early 30s. I've also noticed while older cashiers still card me, younger cashiers just take one look at me and let me get my alcohol with no questions.

 

It only bothers me because I'm immature for my age and it embarrasses me that I'm clearly too old to be a college kid and yet don't know how to act or dress like one who's more mature and experienced.

 

Anyone else got similar experience hitting the big three-o???

[casey.lives]

Aging is a beautiful experience.. stress is not..

keep bad people out of your life and toxic situations too. that's all i got.

[truthtripper]

Until recently, I dressed like a college kid and could easily pass for one. The last few months have been rough though, and maybe I wasn't taking care of myself. So anyway, I recently took a look at my face in the mirror and realized I look... my age. I can maybe pass for being in my mid-20s, but mostly I think I look like I'm in my early 30s. I've also noticed while older cashiers still card me, younger cashiers just take one look at me and let me get my alcohol with no questions.

 

It only bothers me because I'm immature for my age and it embarrasses me that I'm clearly too old to be a college kid and yet don't know how to act or dress like one who's more mature and experienced.

 

Anyone else got similar experience hitting the big three-o???

Yes, I can relate. I'm 40, but feel like I'm in my late 20s. I look younger, dress younger and people think I'm younger. I surprise people when l tell them my age. When I was 25, I could still get into the movies on a children's ticket.

 

But let me tell you, try hanging out with some college kids for a day and you will definitely feel your age!

[SpiralOut]

Yes, now that I'm in my early thirties I find that I can't shop at some of the stores I used to buy clothes. It has taken me some effort to find clothing that feels like "me" yet doesn't look like a 15 year old dressed me. I find that wearing nice shoes can make a huge difference to an outfit. Most people still think I am in my twenties or younger.

 

 

My metabolism has also slowed down, which sucks. I don't feel my age at all, especially since I can't get my sh*t together so far as my career goes. I feel old when I overhear 20 somethings discussing their college courses and what they plan to do after school. I cope by accepting things as they are, and trying not to worry about the way I "should" be.

Edited December 17, 2015 by SpiralOut

[xxoo]

Until recently, I dressed like a college kid and could easily pass for one. The last few months have been rough though, and maybe I wasn't taking care of myself. So anyway, I recently took a look at my face in the mirror and realized I look... my age. I can maybe pass for being in my mid-20s, but mostly I think I look like I'm in my early 30s. I've also noticed while older cashiers still card me, younger cashiers just take one look at me and let me get my alcohol with no questions.

 

It only bothers me because I'm immature for my age and it embarrasses me that I'm clearly too old to be a college kid and yet don't know how to act or dress like one who's more mature and experienced.

 

Anyone else got similar experience hitting the big three-o???

 

How do you dress? What do you imagine to be dressing "your age"?

 

I'm in my early 40s. I dress like this a lot:

 

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/e5/4a/db/e54adbdcba9d308ec61a564b59f4d7d0.jpg

 

What age is that?

 

Find a style that suits you and that is timeless. The quality of my clothing has improved as I've gotten older, but the shapes and styles haven't all that much. I dress for my body type and lifestyle, not my age.

 

As for acting your age, that's mostly about acting responsibly. If you're a responsible adult, you can be a silly and girlish as you wish in personality. Be yourself

[truthtripper]

I don't feel my age at all, especially since I can't get my sh*t together so far as my career goes. I feel old when I overhear 20 somethings discussing their college courses and what they plan to do after school. I cope by accepting things as they are, and trying not to worry about the way I "should" be.

SpiralOut, don't ever be do hard on yourself. Life hasn't been easy and you're trying your best.

[No_Go]

Dressing after 25 (or earlier if you work in an office): no glitter, shiny pants, hello kitty prints, silly quotes, etc. No super cheap stuff (t shirts from the grocery store). Nothing that is too low cut/ provocative. Exceptions are special occasions. No exceptions on clean, ironed clothes.

 

The rest is about personal preference.

 

How do you dress? What do you imagine to be dressing "your age"?

 

I'm in my early 40s. I dress like this a lot:

 

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/e5/4a/db/e54adbdcba9d308ec61a564b59f4d7d0.jpg

 

What age is that?

 

Find a style that suits you and that is timeless. The quality of my clothing has improved as I've gotten older, but the shapes and styles haven't all that much. I dress for my body type and lifestyle, not my age.

 

As for acting your age, that's mostly about acting responsibly. If you're a responsible adult, you can be a silly and girlish as you wish in personality. Be yourself

[losangelena]

Well, I'm in my mid-30s, and even though I still feel like a younger person, I've started to accept the fact that people are going to call me ma'am (even though I hate that).

 

When I was in my late-20s, I started to transition to more adult dressing. That means no hoodies or sweat pants out in public unless I'm actually exercising. Also, I started swapping out cheap flip flops (a So-Cal staple) for nicer sandals. I also, more often than not, go out with just a bit of makeup on (blush + eyebrows + mascara) but not always.

 

Like xxoo, I would say that my basic silhouette has not changed—that is, I still dress fairly casually, more pants than dresses, but that the quality of the clothing has improved. Wool and cashmere get swapped out for cheap synthetics. Same goes for leather shoes and boots. I stay away from trends, but try and infuse my wardrobe with things that still suite my personality. For instance, the last piece of clothing I brought was a mint green and pink leopard-print jumpsuit. Sound garish? It is probably the coolest thing I own and I LOVE wearing it.

 

I don't think "dressing your age" has to equal "dressing old." I personally like having a bit of maturity, and think that using that to my advantage in dressing brings with a bit of respect when I'm out and about.

[No_Go]

LA, you nailed the how-to-dress question in your post. 100% agree - it is not the type of clothing items that change, it is their quality.

Same for make up - I wear less now (pretty much blush, liner and mascara, sometimes base), but more regularly and use higher quality items.

 

Oh, and location appropriateness (sweatpants are to be worn in the gym only) indeed is a must after passing mid 20s, hopefully earlier.

[TaraMaiden2]

Until recently, I dressed like a college kid and could easily pass for one. The last few months have been rough though, and maybe I wasn't taking care of myself. So anyway, I recently took a look at my face in the mirror and realized I look... my age. I can maybe pass for being in my mid-20s, but mostly I think I look like I'm in my early 30s. I've also noticed while older cashiers still card me, younger cashiers just take one look at me and let me get my alcohol with no questions.

 

It only bothers me because I'm immature for my age and it embarrasses me that I'm clearly too old to be a college kid and yet don't know how to act or dress like one who's more mature and experienced.

 

Anyone else got similar experience hitting the big three-o???

 

I shall soon be hitting the big six-o, and apparently according to some, I look more like a four-o.

 

Water.

Lots of it.

A good night's sleep, and

coconut oil, for skin care.

 

Eat well, and give up the alcohol.

Seriously, that stuff ages you more quickly than anything else you could possibly ingest.

And use sun-block, too.

[ASG]

I'm in my 30s and I have just bought my THIRD My Little Pony hoodie. Had someone, not long ago, think I was about 19. I'll take it.

[Tayla]

Haven't grasped the "age" thing. Other then each day we age ... til one day we are done.

 

Is there awards for looking a particular age? Seems we should be blessed to live to see another day and welcome the process and stages.

 

I have a delight in old souls and they seem to have a refreshing attitude...one that goes beyond skin and outward appearence.

 

enjoy the stages... its marveling at times!

[loveweary11]

Thanks to denial, I'm 24.

 

Seriously, just stay in good shape, adopt a youngish looking style you like and be confident/versed in pop culture.

 

Lots of water, butternut squash soup, hardcore moisturizer, such as "topical botox", etc. Stress is the worst ager.

 

Just 2 weeks ago, i presented my ID at Wall in Miami. You may have heard of it. Justin Bieber was there last week. Paris Hilton when I went.

 

Doorman was floored, stunned and couldn't believe my age. I was also with a girl nearly half my age, as usual.

 

So age is a strange thing. You can be old and look/act young, or you can be young and very unhealthy, looking much older.

 

With the college kid look, tons of regular guys have that. Nothing wrong with it.

 

You don't need to dress differently to project an older image.

[No_Go]

I see so many people here and irl thinking they look much younger... To be honest, most of the times irl I can guess the real age regardless of what they say.... So looking younger is very subjective.

[losangelena]

I'm also not sure why "looking younger" is considered such a prized thing. You're 30 but can pass for a teenager? No thanks, no one respects teenagers. I don't agree with the assertion that looking young = looking healthy. Looking 40 when you're 40 doesn't make you unhealthy, it makes you 40. I guess I just know plenty of healthy 40-year-olds.

 

I'm all for embracing middle age when it comes, none of this desperate clinging to youth.

[xxoo]

Looking 30 or 40 or 80 isn't a bad thing. Focus on being healthy and attractive at every age. Wear whatever makes you feel confident and vibrant. Screw the rules

 

Remember that it's a privilege to age. Not everyone has the opportunity; never take your blessings for granted!

[No_Go]

From what I've heard people put three different meanings behind "looking young":

1) "being fun" - immature behavior equates young looks for some reason, not sure how to interpret that myself

2) "being healthy" - precisely what you said, being young doesn't make you healthy and vice versa, so this one is strange as well

3) "being attractive for mates & fertile" - this one makes biologically most sense... I.e. ability to trick a mate that one is capable on reproducing with them. Sounds very animalistic, but one can notice even here "I look young" statements of females are usually followed by remarks about regular periods/ obgyn exams, and statements from males - followed by a statement that they date people half their age...

 

So... I prefer to embrace my age. The life experience & knowledge that I have is not acquired in a day and I'm proud of it, therefore I'm proud to be in my 30s.

 

I'm also not sure why "looking younger" is considered such a prized thing. You're 30 but can pass for a teenager? No thanks, no one respects teenagers. I don't agree with the assertion that looking young = looking healthy. Looking 40 when you're 40 doesn't make you unhealthy, it makes you 40. I guess I just know plenty of healthy 40-year-olds.

 

I'm all for embracing middle age when it comes, none of this desperate clinging to youth.

[xxoo]

To me, seeming "young" means being joyful and vibrant and energetic. People can't get a really clear look at the fine lines and gray hairs when you're always in motion

[lino]

Why is looking one's age a bad thing?

[losangelena]

"being attractive for mates & fertile" - this one makes biologically most sense... I.e. ability to trick a mate that one is capable on reproducing with them. Sounds very animalistic' date=' but one can notice even here [b']"I look young" statements of females are usually followed by remarks about regular periods/ obgyn exams[/b], and statements from males - followed by a statement that they date people half their age...

 

Oh I see, so the next time I go on a date, I'll lead with, "despite my age, I still have regular, 31-day cycles; my license may say I'm 35, but my ovaries aren't a day over 23," and then bat my lashes.

 

I have unlocked the secret to relationship success. Thanks, No_Go! :lmao:

Edited December 19, 2015 by losangelena

[hellohellohello]

Why is looking one's age a bad thing?

 

Because I had lots of issues, am still emotionally stunted, and am basically a 22-year-old trapped in an older body. I'm still trying to play catch up, and it's less embarrassing when you can pass for that age when you obviously look like you're much older and should know better.

[No_Go]

LOL you'd be swamped with men fighting over you (or your youthful ovaries)

 

Oh I see, so the next time I go on a date, I'll lead with, "despite my age, I still have regular, 31-day cycles; my license may say I'm 35, but my ovaries aren't a day over 23," and then bat my lashes.

 

I have unlocked the secret to relationship success. Thanks, No_Go! :lmao:

[No_Go]

Better focus on the catch up, by trying to appear 22 you'd act 22 and... You'll slow down yourself.

 

Because I had lots of issues, am still emotionally stunted, and am basically a 22-year-old trapped in an older body. I'm still trying to play catch up, and it's less embarrassing when you can pass for that age when you obviously look like you're much older and should know better.

[losangelena]

LOL you'd be swamped with men fighting over you (or your youthful ovaries)

 

I need to work "youthful ovaries" somewhere into my dating profile.

[truthtripper]

I'm also not sure why "looking younger" is considered such a prized thing. You're 30 but can pass for a teenager? No thanks, no one respects teenagers. I don't agree with the assertion that looking young = looking healthy. Looking 40 when you're 40 doesn't make you unhealthy, it makes you 40. I guess I just know plenty of healthy 40-year-olds.

 

I'm all for embracing middle age when it comes, none of this desperate clinging to youth.

Some people naturally look younger depending on their race/genes. My Sri Lankan relatives look much younger than their ages. It's also the same for many Africans and Asians. They aren't chasing youth. That's just how they are.

Edited December 21, 2015 by truthtripper