Rape culture.

[lollipopspot]

I'm not clicking on a video link, but the reality is that women are at risk of rape at times and places where men certainly are not. It's just a part of life for women, so much that many women don't even politicize it. When they do, you scream your fool head off about how scary it is for men because they might rape someone by accident or because women are so evil they accuse virtual strangers of rape. I'd much rather be in the position of making sure I had consent before I screwed someone than living a lifetime with the physical constraints put on women (not walking alone at night in places where men feel comfortable, wary about deserted parking lots and buildings, driving at night in certain areas that men have no fear, closing windows when men don't, more careful about areas where I live, etc. - some call it a gender tax).

 

You've earned yourself a lot of insensitivity that I hope life gives you right back.

[losangelena]

How about you women check this out?

 

Feh, I watched it. The majority of the commenters in support were men who sounded a lot like the ones posting here, so I'd take it all with a grain of salt.

 

FWIW, I have not made one statement regarding my views of "rape culture," I can't even say I have much of an opinion about the whole thing, so I resent it when you use phrases like "you women." Don't lump us all together, that's a bit unfair and small-minded. Just like "you men" don't want to be lumped together as "rapists," we don't want to all get lumped together as "rape culture hysterists," either.

 

It's too late for this sh*t. Laterz.

[joystickd]

I'm not clicking on a video link, but the reality is that women are at risk of rape at times and places where men certainly are not. It's just a part of life for women, so much that many women don't even politicize it. When they do, you scream your fool head off about how scary it is for men because they might rape someone by accident or because women are so evil they accuse virtual strangers of rape. I'd much rather be in the position of making sure I had consent before I screwed someone than living a lifetime with the physical constraints put on women (not walking alone at night in places where men feel comfortable, wary about deserted parking lots and buildings, driving at night in certain areas that men have no fear, closing windows when men don't, more careful about areas where I live, etc. - some call it a gender tax).

 

You've earned yourself a lot of insensitivity that I hope life gives you right back.

Actually I haven't earned anything. Instead of focusing on rape culture focus on actual sexual assaults. That's the problem not some created culture by feminists that benefits no one but them. The very fact you and other female users on this thread talk about rape culture is a damn shame. Yes women get raped and no man on here says it doesn't happen but at the same time you can't be grasping for every act YOU deem inappropriate as rape culture. That hurts women that really get raped. It takes accountability away from men that actually rape. It hurts the feminist cause. It creates a bigger divide between men and women. It makes women even weaker and seem like they aren't able to use proper judgement and common sense in situations. It's to the point where books that have things that women deem inappropriate get a trigger point or a singer get protested because of song lyrics. Even false allegations on campuses are giving colleges problems because men are suing due to the lack of due process (This is America here women accused have rights). All because they are over correcting an issue. What sense does that make?

[joystickd]

Feh, I watched it. The majority of the commenters in support were men who sounded a lot like the ones posting here, so I'd take it all with a grain of salt.

 

FWIW, I have not made one statement regarding my views of "rape culture," I can't even say I have much of an opinion about the whole thing, so I resent it when you use phrases like "you women." Don't lump us all together, that's a bit unfair and small-minded. Just like "you men" don't want to be lumped together as "rapists," we don't want to all get lumped together as "rape culture hysterists," either.

 

It's too late for this sh*t. Laterz.

Deal with it. This is what happens on college campuses. Men get lumped. If you don't want that then don't acknowledge some BS rape culture. No man here denies rape happens but don't pull some crap out of your a$$ (not you in particular) and create some hysteria.

[Taramere]

Where there's violent conflict and gang culture, there's violent rape culture. Whether in El Salvador,

in Syria, or London...

 

London gangs are drawing up and disseminating lists of teenage girls whom they consider to be legitimate rape targets, as sexual violence is increasingly used to spread fear and antagonise rival groups...following initiatives that have seen gun crime fall by 17% and knife crime offences by 11.5%. Det Supt Tim Champion of the Metropolitan police's Operation Trident gang crime command, said: "The first thing we had to do is stop people killing each other. The focus now clearly is on women. It's as prevalent as carrying a knife or a gun – raping a girl in a gang."

 

Hubberstey said gang members were taking advantage of low conviction rates for rape, viewing sexual violence as a less-risky means to inflict pain on rivals or spread fear than carrying a weapon.

 

So if you're a young girl, and you live in an area where gangs are prevalent, and your wayward brother is in a gang...you're part of gangster culture whether you want to be or not, and you're a target for other gangs. I think that in peaceful, middle class culture, rape is seen as anomalous behaviour. In war and in gang culture, it's seen as just another weapon. I believe that a lot of men who would not rape in the ordinary course of event will rape if they become part of a gang that normalises rape as part of initiation, revenge, power, entertainment etc. Gangster music celebrates it, and so does violent porn.

 

Over in Syria, it's being done in the name of religion. One doesn't have to subscribe to rape culture, or to promote it, in order to concede that there most certainly are violent pockets of our societies in which there is very much a culture of rape. In those areas, girls who fail to live fearful and closed off from society lives (not going out alone, wearing clothing that conceals them completely) are likely to be viewed as sluts who deserve whatever they get.

 

What we, as women, don't need to do though is berate the men who are as opposed to those sort of societies as we are. It's not fair. It's not to berate, as easy targets, ordinary mainstream men who have no involvement in gang culture. The attention needs to be switched firmly to the actual gangs, criminals and religious extremists. To protecting and promoting the interests of the very vulnerable girls who get caught up with them. Either because they misguidedly believe it'll help them to stay safe, or because they're related to gang members, or have friends who are dating gang members - or simply because they live in an area where it's impossible to escape.

 

This is where feminism often lets the most vulnerable down. The Hillary Clinton style of feminism doesn't always want to get embroiled in that murky area where you might feel you're faced with a choice between protecting vulnerable girls and promoting a sense of peace and harmony in multicultural communities rather than facing the reality that it's often in those communities - in run down areas, where gangs hold a lot of power - that rape culture exists to a shocking degree.

Edited December 18, 2015 by Taramere

[joystickd]

As a matter of fact for all the talk of rape culture historically rape was a capital crime as a matter of fact until 1977 Coker vs Georgia in the US a man could get the death penalty. Does that promote rape culture? No values or traditions passed down.

Have you ever heard stories of what happens to rapists in prison? No rape culture promotion there

[Timshel]

Yes and no. There are fringe female in that movement that hate men that ruin it for the rest. Im for using common sense. Its simple just dont put yourself in that position. Women need some accountibility for their actions. I remember being in college and a girl did a gangbang and her family found out. It waa consentual but when her family found out she said she was raped. She was sober. All the guys got arrested but one. He ran and i remember seeing posters on campus with his face. They got cleared but it probably ruined them because it was in the paper with their faces shown. I mean anyone with a search engine can find it. They will have that follow them as long as they live. Nothing happened to that girl for lying. I know a good number of guys that had incidents like that happen to them. Right now at a nursing home nearby where i live all the white males got suspended because a female patient with dementia said she was raped. White males from every department were suspended. Over some allegation.

 

Ok. Simples....we won't put ourselves in a position to be raped. I honestly do not know why all girls and women have not had this epiphany but thank heavens you have shown all of us the way.

 

I won't apologize for women who have used rape to slander a man. I would never make that up and I have never met a woman who has. As a forensic psych. that is saying a lot.

 

For every one fake there are so many that are unreported. No consequences.... Nothing.

 

Disgusting.

[xxoo]

Position well I'll say it like this

 

1. Be clear with your intentions.

.

 

Ha, that's exactly how I got into the date rapey situation that ended with parents coming home and breaking up the "party". I clearly said "no" to my teenage bf too many times, and he decided to push through the no.

 

Absurdly common scenario among my close girlfriends in teen dating back in the 80s and 90s.

[xxoo]

[

So you mean we as men:

 

 

 

1. Cultivate rape.

 

2. Develop the capacity to rape

3. Have expert care and training in rape.

 

I figure there is a class on rape. Maybe a crash course.

 

4. There is an aesthetically pleasing way to rape. I guess maybe it's with one pinky up.

5. Rape has a set of values, attitudes and practices that get passed on.

 

6. Rape is cultivated in prepared nutrient media.

 

 

 

 

The bolded one. Boys and young men think it's acceptable to initiate sexual activity with drunk girls, and push sex acts on girls the date. I've personally experienced both. Boys will be boys. Rape culture.

[xxoo]

How is using weakness to avoid accountability equality?

 

Equal rights to a safe environment.

 

When is a girl or woman who is legitimately raped accountable for being raped? Never.

[Taramere]

I remember being in college and a girl did a gangbang and her family found out. It was consensual but when her family found out she said she was raped. She was sober. All the guys got arrested but one. He ran and i remember seeing posters on campus with his face. They got cleared...Nothing happened to that girl for lying.

 

Two questions. One - how do you know it was consensual? Two - how did her family find out about it?

[joystickd]

Two questions. One - how do you know it was consensual? Two - how did her family find out about it?

Family found out because someone from her same town was there and told. I knew some was that was there that night but decided not to participate

[joystickd]

Ok. Simples....we won't put ourselves in a position to be raped. I honestly do not know why all girls and women have not had this epiphany but thank heavens you have shown all of us the way.

 

I won't apologize for women who have used rape to slander a man. I would never make that up and I have never met a woman who has. As a forensic psych. that is saying a lot.

 

For every one fake there are so many that are unreported. No consequences.... Nothing.

 

Disgusting.

No one is trying to show anyone the way but it annoying to talk about some "culture" that can be proven not to exist

[thefooloftheyear]

Man....This thing keeps going 'round and 'round...

 

Like another poster said, I wasn't raised by "progressive" parents or anything...I just didn't/don't see anyone condoning anything that remotely resembles any type of forcible contact with a woman...In fact, I can tell you with 100% certainty, if one of the guys I used to run with back in the day was caught taking advantage of a drunk or passed out girl, he'd get the ever loving life beat out of him...For sure..

 

I've managed to live a half a century, yet until this thread, Ive never even heard of this "rape culture"...In fact, its been my own personal experiences that women have been far more sexually aggressive that I would have imagined...But mileage may vary there..

 

None of the points any of the women are making here are invalid....None of it can be questioned or argued..I think where there is some "resistance" from some of the guys is the kind of "profiling" that seems to be pervasive...Like somehow possessing a penis immediately makes you a suspect or just a potential threat....I dunno if that's really fair...

 

Maybe its me, but some of the more radical women seem to want to de-masculinize men with this stuff...The way some of it sounds is even the act itself of penetration is somehow a violation-even in the most benign and accepting fashion..

 

And who knows? Maybe the last 40+ years or so of raising men in gender neutral environments and constantly drilling into their heads all of the negatives surrounding testosterone and the down playing of the prototypical male model of strength and dominance, aggression, etc has turned a lot of men into what you are currently seeing now...

 

Guys that whine all the time, lack drive and refuse to grow up and lack "manly" characteristics that women seem to still want....Sound familiar?

 

I just don't know.??..Thankfully I live in a world where none of this exists...All the women I know and in my family might find all of this kinda crazy...Its understood that guys treat women with the utmost respect and women like strong and masculine type men.....

 

Its interesting to read though....Enjoy the weekend...

 

TFY

[Taramere]

Family found out because someone from her same town was there and told. I knew some was that was there that night but decided not to participate

 

So an adult woman with, presumably, full mental capacity and who was stone cold sober - had fully consensual sex with a bunch of guys. That sounds like the decision of a very confident, outgoing person with limited concern about what other people think.

 

Seems odd that she would suddenly turn into a shrinking wallflower when her family found out about it.

[xxoo]

It's so far from "all men". Of course not! I wouldn't have continued dating if I ever thought for a moment that "all men" are potential rapists, or likely to rape.

 

Closer to the truth is that "all women" (maybe more like 50+%) have experienced sexual coercion, sexual assault, or rape in their lifetime. It's a rape culture because of how prevalent it is among women's experience, not because of how prevalent it is among men.

 

Maybe 25% of men engage in this stuff. Research shows that many college age men admitting to sexual coercion or assault as long as it does not include the word "rape". Their behaviors have been swept under the rug--by both men and women, parents, high school and Uni administrations, for too long. No more. The rape culture is getting called out, and it's about time.

[xxoo]

As for my own kids, I'll teach my son to seek an enthusiastic "yes" before engaging in sexual activity with a girl or woman. If he's anything like his father, that should be no problem for him

 

I talk to my daughter endlessly about protecting herself from potential date rape situations. I tell her never to be alone with a boy, stay with your friends, watch out for your friends, avoid alcohol and drugs, etc etc. But adolescents make mistakes and poor choices. I worry. She's assured me that she would meet any sexual coercion with a fist to the groin. This is reassuring.

[joystickd]

So an adult woman with, presumably, full mental capacity and who was stone cold sober - had fully consensual sex with a bunch of guys. That sounds like the decision of a very confident, outgoing person with limited concern about what other people think.

 

Seems odd that she would suddenly turn into a shrinking wallflower when her family found out about it.

It does but it happens. She figured no one would say anything. Like I have said rape happens but this rape culture is not a thing. The guys I hung around with would whoop an a$$ of a guy that went to far. I remember being at a party and on of my buddies knew this woman and she had a friend with her that was drunk. She took her friend to the bathroom and a guy was like come to the bedroom. She said no then 6 of my buddies and I went up there and said she is not going anywhere. When I say use common sense be around people you trust.

 

I'm a man. My biggest issue with feminism is the fringe females that basically want to shame men for having characteristics that are male. Then raise up men that are weak. Then my other thing is I'm Black. Among blacks in America it has no place. Majority of structures are matriarchal. I was raised with both parents but the men I have known in my life that really didn't respect women were raised with only a mother. That is not to say I have seen some men did great coming up that were raised by a single mom, but it takes a special one. The guys that had issues were raised by moms that had issues with men. I use to talk with them and they constantly heard how men ain't shyte. They also heard it from sisters, aunts, cousins and other female family members. How do you think a boy growing up would feel hearing this constantly all the time?

 

It takes a special person to be objective in spite of all the negativity in dealing with the opposite sex to raise a child of the opposite sex and not bring your bitterness and resentment in the picture.

 

 

Anyway rape culture creates a generalization that all men at some point could rape. The funniest thing is since I have been a nurse I have witness and experienced things from women that had the situation been reversed the men would have been fired and lost their nursing license. Ive had a situation happen that was sexual harassment and was reported. It was investigated and nothing happened. This was with witnesses seeing it happen.

 

How about instead of doing all this protesting at colleges and jumping on threads talking about rape culture figure out how men and women can come together?

 

Pulling song lyrics and signs that are meant as a joke and using them as an example of rape culture is counter productive to the cause of equality. It creates an environment that forces the power structure to over correct itself with the opposite sex having rights violated just to please women. We see that now with males having lawsuits with colleges and its not a small amount of men. That in fact hurts the cause more than anything because it takes away from the actual horrible act of rape. It's shyte like this that makes me against the current model of feminism. Which honestly I am antifeminist I would have to explain after this. The fringe becomes the most vocal and creates more difficulty for coming together for equality.

[joystickd]

It's so far from "all men". Of course not! I wouldn't have continued dating if I ever thought for a moment that "all men" are potential rapists, or likely to rape.

 

Closer to the truth is that "all women" (maybe more like 50+%) have experienced sexual coercion, sexual assault, or rape in their lifetime. It's a rape culture because of how prevalent it is among women's experience, not because of how prevalent it is among men.

 

Maybe 25% of men engage in this stuff. Research shows that many college age men admitting to sexual coercion or assault as long as it does not include the word "rape". Their behaviors have been swept under the rug--by both men and women, parents, high school and Uni administrations, for too long. No more. The rape culture is getting called out, and it's about time.

These statistics come from a credible source?

[xxoo]

These statistics come from a credible source?

 

The Scope of Rape: Incidence and Prevalence of Sexual Aggression and

Victimization in a National Sample of Higher Education Students

 

This is the original 1987 paper by Mary Koss et al. The research has been repeated and expanded by others over the past 3 decades. An entire body of research to be explored on the subject.

[joystickd]

It's so far from "all men". Of course not! I wouldn't have continued dating if I ever thought for a moment that "all men" are potential rapists, or likely to rape.

 

Closer to the truth is that "all women" (maybe more like 50+%) have experienced sexual coercion, sexual assault, or rape in their lifetime. It's a rape culture because of how prevalent it is among women's experience, not because of how prevalent it is among men.

 

Maybe 25% of men engage in this stuff. Research shows that many college age men admitting to sexual coercion or assault as long as it does not include the word "rape". Their behaviors have been swept under the rug--by both men and women, parents, high school and Uni administrations, for too long. No more. The rape culture is getting called out, and it's about time.

Probably less that 25%. Usually those questions asked are a little leading.

https://rainn.org/get-information/statistics/frequency-of-sexual-assault

 

Anyway I'll believe this rather than some stats you put that have no evidence.

[xxoo]

Probably less that 25%. Usually those questions asked are a little leading.

https://rainn.org/get-information/statistics/frequency-of-sexual-assault

 

Anyway I'll believe this rather than some stats you put that have no evidence.

 

I don't see any conflicting stats in your link, but I do see that sexual assault has dropped by 49% since 1993. That's fantastic. I went off to college in 1991. It was very, very common among my peers to experience sexual coercion or assault. Ridiculously common.

[joystickd]

I don't see any conflicting stats in your link, but I do see that sexual assault has dropped by 49% since 1993. That's fantastic. I went off to college in 1991. It was very, very common among my peers to experience sexual coercion or assault. Ridiculously common.

How could there be a rape culture when there is a drop in assaults? If the conversation of rape culture happened years ago them maybe but now that conversation is useless. Males are indoctrinated on what rape is and on some level made to feel shame about their desires.

[xxoo]

How could there be a rape culture when there is a drop in assaults? If the conversation of rape culture happened years ago them maybe but now that conversation is useless. Males are indoctrinated on what rape is and on some level made to feel shame about their desires.

 

The research and laws responded to the rape culture and things are moving In The right direction. Current research shows that, evèn with a drop, rates of assault on campuses is still high.

 

It's like any other social issue. Progress doesn't mean the problem is eliminated.

[joystickd]

The Scope of Rape: Incidence and Prevalence of Sexual Aggression and

Victimization in a National Sample of Higher Education Students

 

This is the original 1987 paper by Mary Koss et al. The research has been repeated and expanded by others over the past 3 decades. An entire body of research to be explored on the subject.

Mary P Koss a feminist collecting info lol. That is about like a Black Panther going around asking if blacks had been victims of racism.

 

She also did a paper Detecting the scope of rape: A review of prevalence research methods.

In it she said this:“Although consideration of male victims is within the scope of the legal statutes, it is important to restrict the term rape to instances where male victims were penetrated by offenders. It is inappropriate to consider as a rape victim a man who engages in unwanted sexual intercourse with a woman. p. 206”

 

Is that a person for equality? What value do they have in researching rape if they can't be objective.