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I have a date tentatively planned for when I get back, with a man I met on the airplane :). I also re-started texting with a man who I previously had kept at a distance in the early days of MM. I think both have some potential. At the very least it might help break the MM spell. I'm excited.

 

That's great! Once you find someone deserving of you...MM will be a distance memory. I hope to be dating soon myself...when I'm ready

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Lemondrop I'm so excited for you!!!

 

You sound so positive right now :)

 

You may still have lows but hold onto how you're feeling now, from my experience every time you hit a low you'll find it easier and easier to get back to this place of peace and positivity.

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I have a date tentatively planned for when I get back, with a man I met on the airplane :). I also re-started texting with a man who I previously had kept at a distance in the early days of MM. I think both have some potential. At the very least it might help break the MM spell. I'm excited.

 

Fantastic! I'm really pleased for you LD.

Tell yourself you won't be an OW next Christmas.. it's not for you.

You can bag yourself a single man and enjoy proper dating.

 

This post really made me smile.....well done to you. It's a great start.

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I too went out on a date the day after X-mas. Really nice guy, fellow alumnus, successful. I'm taking it really slow. Maybe there will be fireworks, maybe not. But I felt good getting myself out there! :)

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Fantastic update! Just getting all dressed up and having some social interaction that doesn't involve any talk of A's or MM's is refreshing in and of itself. Sounds like you're making great strides towards more positive things in your life! Very happy for you. :)

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RecoveringSlowly
I have a date tentatively planned for when I get back, with a man I met on the airplane :). I also re-started texting with a man who I previously had kept at a distance in the early days of MM. I think both have some potential. At the very least it might help break the MM spell. I'm excited.

 

Great job! I hope next Christmas you are too busy with you full life and adoring, exclusive bf to post on message boards :)

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Thank you all for your kind words of encouragement! Still in a very positive place these past few days, seeing friends and getting various tasks done. Had a minor medical procedure that went well too. My mind is very focused on other things, what a relief!

 

Still NC with MM for the time being, no attempts to reach out on either end and I am so happy for that. Hope all of you are starting the new year off positively as well.

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BeautifulIdiot

I'm starting the new year off horribly so would love an update on these date stories so I can hear how good things will be eventually. Come on girls, spill it! :)

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Dates won't be for another couple weeks unfortunately as I'm still out of town, but once they happen I promise I will post!

 

I do have one nice anecdote though: I met one of my upcoming dates in the security line at the airport a couple weeks ago. We happened to be on the same flight, and, as it turns out, my seat was directly behind his. He had a seat free next to him, so after an hour of turning around and chatting to me, he asked me to move up next to him. We continued to chat easily for the whole four hour flight.

 

I get very anxious during landing even though I've flown a million times, so I apologized to him as I gripped the armrests and became visibly stressed and uncomfortable. He smiled and took my hand as the plan landed. It felt like a natural, comfortable thing for him to do after all of our chatting and was a very nice moment.

 

We exchanged a couple brief emails afterward, with the intent to meet up when we are both back from the holidays. I have some reservations and don't expect to be completely swept off my feet, but I am holding onto the moment on the airplane as a positive step forward. :D

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  • 3 weeks later...
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Just to update this about my dates (ok, mainly to vent) -

 

I had two dates after getting back from the holidays, last week. Saturday was okay, I already know this guy as a friend so we can talk in that way. But I can tell it definitely will stay in the friend zone. Not enough physical attraction or "spark" there. He obviously feels it from his end, but I don't.

 

Second date was Monday lunch date, with the guy from the plane. That was horrendous. I don't know how I managed to talk to this guy for 3 hours on the plane. Even if I hadn't been in a state about MM and our breakup, I know we would have been incompatible. He is NOT my type physically and shares traits that i hated about my ex bf. Obviously I was just REALLY wanting it to be something in order to get over ex bf and MM and start fresh.

 

After the failed date was when I went into MM's office almost crying. So, clearly dating is not in the cards for me yet. Healing and time to myself will need to occur first.

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Just to update this about my dates (ok, mainly to vent) -

 

I had two dates after getting back from the holidays, last week. Saturday was okay, I already know this guy as a friend so we can talk in that way. But I can tell it definitely will stay in the friend zone. Not enough physical attraction or "spark" there. He obviously feels it from his end, but I don't.

 

Second date was Monday lunch date, with the guy from the plane. That was horrendous. I don't know how I managed to talk to this guy for 3 hours on the plane. Even if I hadn't been in a state about MM and our breakup, I know we would have been incompatible. He is NOT my type physically and shares traits that i hated about my ex bf. Obviously I was just REALLY wanting it to be something in order to get over ex bf and MM and start fresh.

 

After the failed date was when I went into MM's office almost crying. So, clearly dating is not in the cards for me yet. Healing and time to myself will need to occur first.

 

That's too bad that your dates didn't go well. Sounds like you haven't met the right guy yet. I think dating is a numbers game and sometimes you have to date a lot of guys to find the right one. It does help you learn what you want in a mate. I had a lot of dates that were like what you described. You keep trying and eventually you'll meet someone right for you. Maybe you're not ready to date yet.

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Forceawakensme

Dont give up honey... You cant force the chemistry as you know.. but you *will* feel it with someonelse soon. Remember you didn't even notice your MM until he showed interest? -- Sometimes you dont see it at first.

 

I was attracted to my MM's personality right off the bat but definitely not looks -- and never saw him as anything but a friend UNTIL he expressed his initial attraction etc. Then i almost was like 'why not.. this couldl be fun.. its fun to be wanted'.. feeling like i could control my feelings all along because..well i didn't have any budding feelings to begin with. It was more a selfish adventure... as i wanted to know what it felt like to be with someone who told me they had secretly wanted me for years and had to stay away because they were afraid they couldn't control themselves. I had no such feelings at the time and felt like.. wow..this feels amazing and i have the power and control in this situation so i can make sure it doesn't get out of hand. --- Ha.. yeah that didn't work out so well.

 

But remember how it started... he wasn't on your radar. He can get off it again. Time with girlfriends, working out, i work out to songs about men sucking lol.yes lots of taylor swift.. 'i knew you were trouble' in there. and 'we are never getting back together'.--- Also, shows that make you laugh.. ive been youtubing funny shows... knowing its going to take time.....You need someone with a great personality and sense of humor, once they have you laughing out loud you'll start forgetting about exMM. (Yes, i just called him your Ex... I need to start referring to mine in the same way).

Edited by Forceawakensme
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