Zerobasedd Posted December 22, 2015 Share Posted December 22, 2015 Hi, So I've known this guy for around a year now, after having met online, and in late June we started really hitting it off. We chatted throughout most nights, called regularly and met up in August during a stage when we were largely flirting - it was also at this point that he ended a relationship that was apparently going downhill. Fast-track to now and things are a different story. Around 3 weeks ago we made it 'official', in that we started to consider ourselves to be in an actual relationship with each other. Since then, things seem to have changed. We no longer have proper conversations, and have only called once in the fortnight. I have tried on a couple of occasions to raise this issue up, and ask if he's still happy etc., yet he goes silent persisting it's because he doesn't like confrontation and shuts down. While we had many plans for later life, which he does still mention, he never seems to have the time to just meet up anymore, saying 'I'm busy' whenever I try to arrange something. Not only that, but this past week since I last raised my concerns I've only been able to get short phrases in response to anything I ask, and am 90% of the time starting the conversations in the first place; there seems to be no effort from him at contacting me anymore, despite being quite energetic at talking to other people. I'm really confused and lost for what I should do. I have major feelings for him, and over the past 6 months he has said he does for me too - in fact, he was the first person to say 'I love you' so to speak. I don't want to have to end it since I don't want to be hasty in the event he's not meaning to come off as he is, but at the same time I feel like I'm only making things worse for both of us by trying against that. Thanks in advance for any advice anyone might have for the situation Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted December 22, 2015 Share Posted December 22, 2015 Unless he's got some other serious stressors in his life right now, it sounds like he's losing interest. You say you met up in August - have you spent time together in person since then? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Zerobasedd Posted December 22, 2015 Author Share Posted December 22, 2015 Nope - the following month we were both away on trips and such, and since then we've kept saying we would but ultimately the plans fell through. He did say we would again before Christmas, though it's ended up with him saying he's too busy despite making it clear on social media there are days when he would be free. Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted December 23, 2015 Share Posted December 23, 2015 Nope - the following month we were both away on trips and such, and since then we've kept saying we would but ultimately the plans fell through. He did say we would again before Christmas, though it's ended up with him saying he's too busy despite making it clear on social media there are days when he would be free. I'd say he is probably going to end it, to be very honest. Seeing each other only once in this long of a period is not enough to sustain a connection and attraction for many people. And if he is not making time to visit, a long-distance relationship simply can't survive. One point to consider might be money. Do you know much about his current finances? A lot of men don't disclose financial problems, which could be impeding his travel plans. Link to post Share on other sites
Lois_Griffin Posted December 24, 2015 Share Posted December 24, 2015 LDR's are a crap shoot at best. You can't sustain a real relationship via Skype and text. That gets REAL old after a while. spending a week or two together twice a year just isn't satisfying for most people. He's clearly doing a slow fade because he wants to live his life in real time, not on Skype. Link to post Share on other sites
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