Author Louisesarah Posted December 23, 2015 Author Share Posted December 23, 2015 He came over sober then we got drunk. Link to post Share on other sites
Ms. Faust Posted December 23, 2015 Share Posted December 23, 2015 He came over sober then we got drunk. So he didn't make the decision to have sex with you sober. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Louisesarah Posted December 23, 2015 Author Share Posted December 23, 2015 I feel as well like I've betrayed him. He told me to make sure it stayed between me and him then my friend ( his sis) told me she knew something had went on from how we were acting and he gave himself away. If I didn't tell her the truth our 14 year friendship was over. I told her and I'm worried she has told him I told her. Then again if she had he probably would of sent me some insults by now. I feel like I betrayed him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Louisesarah Posted December 23, 2015 Author Share Posted December 23, 2015 So he didn't make the decision to have sex with you sober. Well he was sober in the morning. Hungover and being sick but sober. It had been 15 hours after he had a drink so I'm assuming he was sober. Link to post Share on other sites
Ms. Faust Posted December 23, 2015 Share Posted December 23, 2015 Well he was sober in the morning. Hungover and being sick but sober. It had been 15 hours after he had a drink so I'm assuming he was sober. Probably not. I have woken up and been drunk the next day. Either which say, interesting how you minimize his actions. Link to post Share on other sites
Lurkeraspect Posted December 23, 2015 Share Posted December 23, 2015 This guy is a raging drunk. Please go back and read all your posts. Your words. Also, Ms. Faust is correct. Page 16/posts 229 & 230. Remember when he vomited and you still let him have a go at you? Therapy is needed. Along with new friends. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Lurkeraspect Posted December 23, 2015 Share Posted December 23, 2015 I never thought I would miss talking to him like I am. I wish we could go back to being friends. Anything is better than nothing. He's NOT your friend. He used you for sex. And no. Nothing is better than anything this cheating, drunk has to offer you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Louisesarah Posted December 23, 2015 Author Share Posted December 23, 2015 In all fairness for 2 years all we did was talk/text as friends. I did class him as a friend. Link to post Share on other sites
ShatteredLady Posted December 23, 2015 Share Posted December 23, 2015 Becoming a new Mum for the first time can be terrifying & overwhelming. I'd been married for more than 10 years, together 16 years & it was still scary. Ugh! Then add the hormones & sleep deprivation! Ugh!! When this 'mans' child was TWO WEEKS OLD he was getting blind drunk & staying out all night having sex with another woman (his girl friend hadn't been putting-out for a while because SHE HAD JUST HAD HIS CHILD!!!!). If I was his partner & the mother of his child HIS behavior & the fact that HE would be a role model, FATHER to my child would make me insane!! Can ANY woman say that she would be at her best in her situation? PLEASE focus on what I've said. He's not a broken bird for you to empathize with & FIX. He is a VERY DANGEROUS man for any poor woman to get stuck with!! You have become obsessed with a teenage fantasy. He's your friends big brother. Many of my friends had crushes on my brother. Growing-up seeing him & coming to family dinners didn't make then him soul mate & it didn't mean tht they knew him. Even his family (who enable his horrible behavior) are honest about what a nightmare he is to ANY woman who has the misfortune of getting close to him! PLEASE stop fantasizing this guy. You deserve better! I KNOW this to be true because ALL women are too good for him!! He needs to do so much work on himself but isn't going to in the foreseeable future because he blames everyone & everything for HIS appalling behavior & attitude to life & women. There are men like him & most of them talk a good job...how else would they ever get girl friends?? PLEASE take care of yourself. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Louisesarah Posted December 23, 2015 Author Share Posted December 23, 2015 I always found him attractive but it was him over the 2 years who always came to me etc. I never went to him. He messed me about for years talking about being with me and messing with my head. I trusted Him and it hurts like hell the way he did treat me. The thought of Him lying with him talking about my late mum and me confiding in him and Him not being genuine breaks my heart. I wear my heart on my sleeve and would never intentionally hurt someone. You know even if he had just apologised for how he treated me then never spoke to me again what of been better than this horrible sick worthless feeling. Link to post Share on other sites
ladydesigner Posted December 23, 2015 Share Posted December 23, 2015 (((Louisesarah))) there is nothing even remotely likable about this guy. I realize you 'think' he was your friend, but friend's just don't do these things to each other. I agree with the other poster who pointed out that you were minimizing his actions. How does this benefit you? This guy is not a catch, he needs to be removed from the pedestal you are placing him on. The REAL him is the one who hurt you. He will always be capable of this unless he were to seek out help or get a lobotomy. I don't think you should spend another second thinking about this A** 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Louisesarah Posted December 24, 2015 Author Share Posted December 24, 2015 I've always found it difficult when you put your trust in someone and this is how they repay you. Nobody has ever treated me with so little respect and it hurts. I'm going to try and enjoy Christmas. I have lovely friends and dad and nan which I am grateful for. We may fall out at times but they are always here for me. I've had quite a few texts merry Christmas from people and nothing from Him. In my opinion if he can't even stretch to a merry Christmas then he never cared even in the slightest. Link to post Share on other sites
anika99 Posted December 24, 2015 Share Posted December 24, 2015 I hope you have a good Christmas OP. I get that this guy mislead you and filled your head with ideas of being together but you really need to chalk this up to a learning experience. You have learned a valuable lesson about judging someone by their actions, not their flattery and flowery words. In the future you will know not to put your trust in someone who is cheating and has a full fledged drinking problem. You will know not to believe in words and promises from someone who is doing nothing to make those promises real. I get the impression that you are fairly young so don't waste your precious youth on guys like this. You should be dating, having fun, chasing your dreams; not waiting for some drunken cheater to pay attention to you Link to post Share on other sites
Author Louisesarah Posted December 24, 2015 Author Share Posted December 24, 2015 Merry Christmas to you all. I hope you all have a wonderful day with your families and friends. I hope I get over Him soon and I know I have to start making a effort myself. I know tomorrow I will be waiting to see if he texts me(I know for a fact that he won't do). I guess that will be the proof(not that I need proof as the last few months has been proof enough. Link to post Share on other sites
ladydesigner Posted December 24, 2015 Share Posted December 24, 2015 Merry Christmas to you all. I hope you all have a wonderful day with your families and friends. I hope I get over Him soon and I know I have to start making a effort myself. I know tomorrow I will be waiting to see if he texts me(I know for a fact that he won't do). I guess that will be the proof(not that I need proof as the last few months has been proof enough. Please don't do this to yourself hun. Make yourself as busy as possible so it won't matter if he does or doesn't. You carry on girl with your head held high. Merry Christmas to you Link to post Share on other sites
Author Louisesarah Posted December 25, 2015 Author Share Posted December 25, 2015 Well it's 2.45 pm and he never got in touch but I'm not shocked really. This time next year I will be so much happier :-) Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted December 25, 2015 Share Posted December 25, 2015 OP, I was in your shoes in a manner for many years long ago and it's a true gift to get to the place in life when nobody contacts one and one finds that a healthy and peaceful thing. Happy holidays and, indeed, IME things do get better. Link to post Share on other sites
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