Should employees become facebook friends with their supervisors?

[Bobbi7]

There's a bunch of new hires that came in recently and I noticed that several of them now became "close" friends with one of our supervisors. Then, I overhead one new hire was telling all her personal things to the supervisor-it wasn't work relating at all. I saw that about the majority of them are facebook friends. Who does that? For me, I don't trust supervisors and I don't tell me personal things unless I have to call in and even if I told them due to the fact of calling in-they don't even care-because they never ask me about it. From past experiences, I don't ever want to be "friends" with any supervisor -let alone facebook friends. One time I thought I was friends with a manager at a my old retail job years ago, we talked, and we talked about our personal lives-until the day that I wasn't making the cut in retail and she fired me. That really stung-because I thought she was a "friend." Since then, I don't want to get too close to any manager-except the stranger small talk we have to make. Who's right and who's wrong?

[Lurkeraspect]

Personally as a manager, I don't tend to be friends with my subordinates, for some of the very reasons you mentioned.

 

Why are you so concerned about this? I'd suggest just doing your job and minding your own business.

[basil67]

You're wrong to judge. Everyone else is just doing what they are comfortable with.

[HurtOfGlass]

I am supervisor. Some of my subordinates are my FB friends. But just that. I don't tag them on any activity on FB neither do I chat with them. Sharing very very personal matters to coworkers is a double edged sword. Yes, it gives you support but when things go south the same information you share can come back to bite you. You can sure talk with them about stuff. But never disclose too much.

 

Same goes for my manager.

 

Another factor that plays in my workplace is that I am the youngest employee in the operations department. I am 27 and all of my colleagues are in 35-55 range of age. Though my interaction with them has somewhat dramatically increased since I got married because now I am in their "club"

[HurtOfGlass]

Another thing is my job requires a lot of shouting at the workers. Becoming too friendly with them will not get the job done. As long as I am the hated "blackhand" of the management, they will do as I say.

[Rejected Rosebud]

Didn't you already have this thread? My answer is, it's not your business. Merry Christmas!

[privategal]

I think maybe op wasn't suggesting the co-workers were his business but might feel conflicted for not being part of the popular manority in his workplace while trying to uphold personal boundaries.

I think he wasn't judging as much as feeling it seems like the more appropriate thing that subordinates and management keep this line and wondering why he is the only one who seems to feel this.

Op my company is small and our boss is friends (she sends friend requests) on FB...And I gasped when I saw her request to be my fb friend. As a new hire it was a social pressure to accept, and I felt it was wrong of her to send invite as I felt I had no choice. How do you decline your BOSS?!

I have regretted accepting. Its very intrusive and I censor everything I say now and its frustrating. I wish I had kept my private life private.

[losangelena]

Bobbi's a woman, just FYI.

 

For me, it depends. I mostly work from home, but at my last full-time job, my direct supervisor and I became friends on fb and in real life. We shared a lot of personal info and did shots of tequila together (it was a pretty lax environment, lol). A few years later, after we'd both left that company, I babysat for he and his wife before they moved out of state. Maybe that's an extreme example, because most of the supervisors I've had I haven't wanted anything to do with outside work.

 

But by and large I think it depends on office culture, industry, position, etc.

Edited December 25, 2015 by losangelena

[Got it]

No. Don't mix personal with business as it will not err well for the supervisor.

[Mind-Chants]

I am a supervisor with 50+ subordinates. What u mentioned about new joiners happened to me but I find a trend. New gen is tech savvy and it is a digital age. Online professional and personal relationships are now a thing. Subordinates between 20-35 have all befriended me on FB but this trend goes down further with age.

I think it is important to draw a fine line between professional and personal issue. As a supervisor, it is important to have some sort of personal relation with subordinates. It kind of builds an atmosphere of trust and oneness. I find, it helps in vertical communication within the company.

I regularly throw parties (formal) for my subordinates and their families but always in groups not for any individual. Some of their wives, gf and even subordinates socialize with my gf.

I never faced any problem as such.

 

And yes they know that I am all about getting job done so occasional screaming and performance memos are not out of picture.

[central]

They should do what they want, as should you, but connecting with management through social media is usually a bad idea. I've seen - or heard of - too many people who were fired because of indiscretions that came to light via their use of social media. I suggest strictly controlling what you share with whom, to prevent real or perceived problems.

[Gunny376]

I as a member of management I don't mix my personal ~ social sphere with my professional ~ business sphere, except as may be from time to time expected, and then its short, sweet, and to the point. Nor do I have any desire, need, nor want to do so. Why should I?

 

Even a dog has the good sense NOT, to crap where it eats! When it comes to one's business ~ professional life? The less said is the best said when it comes to one's personal life

 

I do make the rare exception, but it usually because they're of "my tribe" ~ i.e. RETIRED MILITARY ~ to be specific ~ Retired United States Marines, ~ the Retired Career Navy ~ less so Army ~ and even less so Air Force. Just no mutual point of reference.

 

Me, myself and I? I'd rather have four solid silver quarters, than 100 zinc, coppered coated pennies? But that's just me.

[srah]

No. I keep the lines between myself and my supervisors pretty defined. I don't think there is any expectation in the business world to befriend your supervisors (or even peers) on FB, Twitter, or any other social networking site.

 

Once you move on from this job, however, you may want to befriend supervisors, peers, etc. whom you want to stay connected with later on in your career. I have done this and found it helpful. (I was even offered a job at a former employer somewhat as a result of staying connected.)

 

However, if you decide to keep former employers, co-workers, etc. as friends on FB, I would keep your content appropriate to that audience. Assume that your former supervisor will see everything that you post, and ask yourself if that is how you want to be viewed. If you do this, it just requires more curating and editing of your posts.

 

Best of luck.