I need some opinion here.

[Jim]

I'm 27 and my girlfriend is 19. She told me that she loves me so much and she can't live without me and stuff like that. I'm her very first boyfriend and she seems sincere whenever she tell me those stuff. but i don't feel it, i don't feel that she loves me that much and i don't know why. Could it be that there's something wrong with me? could it be that i want her to be like what i want her to be sometimes? I'm very confused.

 

Finally, can anyone tell me what problems will i encounter with a girlfriend that is only 19 and i'm 26? I really need to know.

 

Thanks.

[Tony T]

You can never feel what another person is feeling. You will never know just how much another person loves you because all they can do is tell you. You can only feel for yourself the love you feel for them.

 

Perhaps she doesn't show her love in ways you want to see or are able to see. She's young...maybe you should tell her what makes you feel loved so she can do things to help you better feel that she cares.

 

Or maybe you are just fighting your own feelings. Maybe you have some fear you are unaware of.

 

As far as the age difference, there is no problem whatsoever now. However, when you are 100, she will be 92 and it's highly likely you will go for some younger chicks at that time. But that's her problem, not yours.

[bubbles]

I agree with what Tony said about fighting your own feelings. It sounds to me like some part of you is holding back and that is what is making you unsure about the relationship. Now about the age difference. Who really gives a stuff? If you love each other then age doesn't have anything to do with it. As long as your willing to accept the differences that comes with this then you should be fine.

You can never feel what another person is feeling. You will never know just how much another person loves you because all they can do is tell you. You can only feel for yourself the love you feel for them. Perhaps she doesn't show her love in ways you want to see or are able to see. She's young...maybe you should tell her what makes you feel loved so she can do things to help you better feel that she cares. Or maybe you are just fighting your own feelings. Maybe you have some fear you are unaware of. As far as the age difference, there is no problem whatsoever now. However, when you are 100, she will be 92 and it's highly likely you will go for some younger chicks at that time. But that's her problem, not yours.

[clia]

I just want to comment on the age difference. I think at your age 7 years is a big difference. This is just my opinion, but here's why:

 

As teenagers, a lot of women really pour everything into relationships. Our society has sort of programmed into our minds that we need a boyfriend to be happy. Therefore, it's very important to have one. In doing so, we often neglect ourselves and what our true passions are, instead live 'for' our boyfriends. (Your comment that 'she can't live without you' is a key indicator of this.) Unless your girlfriend is very mature, you might be in for some major changes in her personality as she gets older. (I know I'm completely different than I was at 19. I'm 26 now, too.) She is only beginning to discover herself and who she is. Right now you are probably the most important thing in her life. That could change.

 

You are both at very different points in your life. She can't even legally go to the bars yet. I'm assuming you've been there, done that, as far as partying is concerned. You might be looking to settle down a little more. She is only now starting to enter the phase of life where she is independent from her parents and can do her own thing. You've been there for years. You've done so much more 'living' than your girlfriend. She still has to get through college, get her first job, buy her first car, etc. Your lifestyles are liable to be very different over the next few years. You might be content to sit home and rent a movie while she wants to hit the clubs.

 

I'm not trying to discourage you at all. There's no reason why your relationship can't work. I mean, I don't know either one of you or what your relationship is like. But, I think 7 years is a pretty substantial difference at this age. When she's 25 and your 32, it won't be a big deal at all.

[LIZ]

i know how you feel i'm 31 with 2 children and my boyfriend is 25 without children. i'm very insecure with the age diffence because i feel he could have a girlfriend his own age and without children. but, he says he loves me very much and i just have to accept that i suppose - why would he waste his time otherwise - i guess you'll have to try to think the same way even though it can be hard. GOOD LUCK!