AzW Posted December 29, 2015 Share Posted December 29, 2015 I was in a 25 year marriage and I was cheated on several times during that 25 years, I have always taken her but never really trusted her. We split 2 times in the marriage for about 6 months each. This last time we have been split for 2 years. Papers were filed and we were about a week from the final day in court. Now she wants to get back together but I find myself questioning her motives and also my own feelings. She had ask to come to my brothers marriage renewal, I told her I was bringing a date and she said "I am happy for you" but then a few days later she is saying she wants to move back home. Mind you, she asked for the divorce not me. She has lived with another man for the last 12-15 months, she ended it with him and moved into a female co-workers house. I want our family to be back together but I fear she just repeat the same pattern a few months, years down the road. I am really at a lost on what to do now. Link to post Share on other sites
crazycanuck86 Posted December 29, 2015 Share Posted December 29, 2015 Listen shes already proven to you time and again that you can't trust her also she's still sticking to the same behaviour patterns which indicate that she has no intention of changing. My advice to you is to cut her from your life and walk away and find someone who is worthy of your trust. Yes it's going to suck and hurt but you'll be doing yourself a favor in the long run. Link to post Share on other sites
Jersey born raised Posted December 29, 2015 Share Posted December 29, 2015 Why on earth would you want to re-introduce a toxic element back into your family ?? For your sake and your families sake let sleeping polar bears sleep. Link to post Share on other sites
Jersey born raised Posted December 29, 2015 Share Posted December 29, 2015 Yes I used "polar bear". People think they are so cute, until they try to hug one or pet it. Link to post Share on other sites
latinmex Posted December 29, 2015 Share Posted December 29, 2015 you must be kidding !!!!!! - she cheat on you several times - she ask for the divorce - you was not divorce and she is already living with another man and you still thinking in back with her would you like to live all your life with somebody like her do you have some respect for yourself ??????????? Link to post Share on other sites
Author AzW Posted December 29, 2015 Author Share Posted December 29, 2015 Could she have changed? She says she is not the same person that walked away from me 2 years ago. I don't trust her but I also do not want anyone to say I did not try to save the marriage. She says she ****ed up and wants to fix it all... Link to post Share on other sites
Popsicle Posted December 30, 2015 Share Posted December 30, 2015 Go post this in the infidelity section. There will be people there who will tell you to stay together, get help, and work on your marriage, which I think is what you want to hear. No one will tell you that in this section. Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Lucky Posted December 30, 2015 Share Posted December 30, 2015 She has lived with another man for the last 12-15 months, she ended it with him and moved into a female co-workers house. Has it occurred to you she simply needs a place to live and sees you as the most likely to provide? In her mind, time to implement the back-up plan since things didn't work out with her OM. And who could blame her for trying, you've taken her back every time before. At least be honest about what you're doing... Mr. Lucky Link to post Share on other sites
Friskyone4u Posted December 30, 2015 Share Posted December 30, 2015 Bad move buddy. Keep it like it is?? Why on earth do you think it will be different this time. So far, all you have said it has not worked out with her latest boyfriend and she is crashing with a co worker. Obviously, she is not going to tell you she wants to move back in until she finds a new toy. Do you even know why she broke up with the guy she has been living with. For all you know, he will reappear before she gets all her stuff moved in. from what you have described, this is disaster for you waiting to happen. Link to post Share on other sites
Wheremyheartis Posted December 30, 2015 Share Posted December 30, 2015 Have you considered to ask her that you are "willling" (and I put willing very loosely) to work on your relationship but she can't move back home at this time until you are convinced that she has really changed. Like others have mentioned. She could just want a place to stay. If she really wants to be back with you, she should be willing to do whatever it takes to prove to you she wants you. Just a thought to think about. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AzW Posted December 31, 2015 Author Share Posted December 31, 2015 Have you considered to ask her that you are "willling" (and I put willing very loosely) to work on your relationship but she can't move back home at this time until you are convinced that she has really changed. Like others have mentioned. She could just want a place to stay. If she really wants to be back with you, she should be willing to do whatever it takes to prove to you she wants you. Just a thought to think about. That is kinda where I am atm Link to post Share on other sites
aliveagain Posted December 31, 2015 Share Posted December 31, 2015 Serial cheater, living with a man for the last year and a half and just discovered that the grass wasn't greener but just watered more. Finish the divorce, decide if you want to marry her again later. Taking her back would be a major life mistake, just my opinion. She has done nothing to win a second/.third or fourth chance so don't give her one. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts