Should I use Go Fund Me website for foreign dating

[logan415]

IMO, pass on the solicitation and get an in country apartment rented and go. You should be able to do most locales, save for the big cities, for 3500 for the month, including air. Shop and eat like a local and no extravagant dates.

 

My experiences were a couple of years of dating FSU/CIS ladies and spending about two months in total in-country. The two most consistently expensive single items were my interpreter and driver. However, they both were instrumental in avoiding scams and bad choices and my driver was wonderful with the police. I think my first month long trip ran about 3200 all-included, including long-distance trains. The costs of dating, meaning relevant to the women, were essentially nothing.

 

Good luck and, if your adventure requires a K1 or K3, figure 25-50K in personal expenses to get a solid wife whom you've vetted thoroughly. Also budget for her (and you) to return to visit family.

 

Really 3200? I always thought more pricier than that. That is something I have not did is look around and see what I can get for a reasonable price. The flight is the most expensive part. $ 1700.00 for round trip.

 

I don't need a interpreter since she speaks English pretty good.

Edited December 30, 2015 by logan415

[carhill]

Learn how to travel cheap. Back then I knew zippo about that. There's plenty of info on the web these days. I could book a flight today from my local airport to Moscow for nothing more than an award fee and taxes. Why? Being smart with airline frequent flier programs. Read up. You can go wherever you want to go. Also, you can barter your skills in-country for things you need. I'm just a working stiff, a grease monkey. It may not mean much in the good ole USA but other countries that need stuff going I can make work and that has value. Use it.

[logan415]

Learn how to travel cheap. Back then I knew zippo about that. There's plenty of info on the web these days. I could book a flight today from my local airport to Moscow for nothing more than an award fee and taxes. Why? Being smart with airline frequent flier programs. Read up. You can go wherever you want to go. Also, you can barter your skills in-country for things you need. I'm just a working stiff, a grease monkey. It may not mean much in the good ole USA but other countries that need stuff going I can make work and that has value. Use it.

 

I do have IT and science skills. I had a friend who went to Australia and Thailand for about 3 months. I think she worked in Thailand for a short period to keep money going.

[carhill]

That skillset is mobile so you can barter or sell it to anywhere from anywhere. It's essentially unlimited in scope of opportunity.

 

While you're saving up, hit the travel forums as well as the discussion forums for the specific country/region. Back when I was traveling, I used RWL (Russian Women's List) at St. John's University but that was before web forums essentially existed. Nowadays, if FSU is your destination, RWD (Russian Women Discussion) is a good resource.

 

Up to you. TBH, I'd strongly suggest getting some local relationship experience first. Women who are willing to relocate to foreign countries and leave their families and friends behind look for a serious man with skills in relationships. One needs to be a compelling specimen for a quality woman to give all that up and face the unknown. The doctor in my albums here that I dated was one of those. If I hadn't been a dope and chose someone else locally we'd probably still be together today. That's life!

[losangelena]

IMO, pass on the solicitation and get an in country apartment rented and go. You should be able to do most locales, save for the big cities, for 3500 for the month, including air. Shop and eat like a local and no extravagant dates.

 

My experiences were a couple of years of dating FSU/CIS ladies and spending about two months in total in-country. The two most consistently expensive single items were my interpreter and driver. However, they both were instrumental in avoiding scams and bad choices and my driver was wonderful with the police. I think my first month long trip ran about 3200 all-included, including long-distance trains. The costs of dating, meaning relevant to the women, were essentially nothing.

 

Good luck and, if your adventure requires a K1 or K3, figure 25-50K in personal expenses to get a solid wife whom you've vetted thoroughly. Also budget for her (and you) to return to visit family.

 

With all due respect, Carhill, how long ago was this?

 

I can barely live for a month in L.A. for $3200. Granted, we don't know where OP is going, but methinks he'll need a bit more than that.

[carhill]

If you want me to do a complete costed rundown for Odessa, Kiev or similar, places I stayed, in today's dollars, I can do it but I'll probably be pretty brutal in my response. I travel internationally for cheap often and have a real good handle on costs, real costs, and how to do it cheap. Back then, it was a full service travel agency, really expensive, about 1500, airfare, and a driver and interpreter who cost about a grand for a month of daily use. The apartments ran around 50.00 per week in local currency and train tickets for a whole first class cabin (the whole room), ran between 50 and 100 bucks per trip. Food was essentially nothing. I took a date to the symphony for one dollar each. Circus was 1.50 each. Took the doctor, her daughter and granddaughter to that.

 

Yeah, if the guy is going to Moscow and hitting all the high dollar tourist sucks, sure he'll need a lot of money. Me I did the cheap and free stuff. I still talk to old friends in country who expated and it's still cheap to live if one makes that choice. Up to the OP

[logan415]

With all due respect, Carhill, how long ago was this?

 

I can barely live for a month in L.A. for $3200. Granted, we don't know where OP is going, but methinks he'll need a bit more than that.

 

I'm going to Belarus.

[basil67]

Please tell us that you haven't sent her any money

[logan415]

Please tell us that you haven't sent her any money

 

No. I wouldn't either.

[carhill]

I'm going to Belarus.

Difficult country. Still tough. However, guys who are willing to go through the process get the advantages that come with it, mainly variety. I experienced that in the early years after the end of Communism when Americans were exceedingly rare. In fact my first trip I never encountered anyone who spoke English in public, anywhere, and that included the airports and train stations.

 

Procedure for obtaining visas to enter the Republic of Belarus - Ministry of Foreign Affairs of the Republic of Belarus

 

I never stayed in Belarus, rather transited it. Heh, back then, I had to register a hard-won visa with the OVIR in-country (Russia/Ukraine) and advise them of every change of location and, yup, those guys at the airport with guns were all over my visa and passport when I went to leave, making sure it was all in order. Fun times

[losangelena]

OP, are you wanting to meet this woman because you're truly drawn/attracted to her and you think you want a possible future with her, or is she just finally someone you feel like you can be intimate with?

 

Because I can understand and respect the first, but the later just seems so clinical, and ... unnecessary. Like you're really going to go through the gigantic rigamarole of traveling to Belarus, and spend all that money to meet a woman you feel may have "solid interest?"

 

Now, I'm not saying this because it never happens (people do have extraordinary, long-distance love stories), I'm just wondering if you've really pinpointed your true motivations for meeting her. Right now it sounds like, in your mind, she's your only hope, and that's just statistically untrue. There are almost 160 million women in the United States alone. I'm almost positive that if you made the effort, you could find someone closer.

 

This all just seems incredibly risky. To lay down $5,000+ dollars for what would essentially be a first date? What if it doesn't work out? Then you're out $5,000 and still alone. Never mind the personal safety risks that may or may not exist.

 

Look, I'm not saying it doesn't happen. Just the other week I shared an airplane row with a middle-aged American dude and his somewhat younger fiancee, who had an Eastern European accent. They seemed happy.

 

Just don't be rash with this.

[logan415]

Difficult country. Still tough. However, guys who are willing to go through the process get the advantages that come with it, mainly variety. I experienced that in the early years after the end of Communism when Americans were exceedingly rare. In fact my first trip I never encountered anyone who spoke English in public, anywhere, and that included the airports and train stations.

 

Procedure for obtaining visas to enter the Republic of Belarus - Ministry of Foreign Affairs of the Republic of Belarus

 

I never stayed in Belarus, rather transited it. Heh, back then, I had to register a hard-won visa with the OVIR in-country (Russia/Ukraine) and advise them of every change of location and, yup, those guys at the airport with guns were all over my visa and passport when I went to leave, making sure it was all in order. Fun times

 

 

I seen that website. Long list of things that is needed to be complete. Thanks for all the help man. I appreciate it.

[nicco]

Actually I'm more at risk of being shot and killed in the US than her country (look at all the mass shootings and gun violence). You don't here all the gun violence over there like here. You got people in America fighting over a item during Black Friday. She does not live in Ukraine as someone mention Ukraine. Most of the former USSR countries are pretty okay. Of course there are some crazy ones but crazy people exist everywhere.

 

So if you meet a woman in America how much do you trust her? She could have her posse waiting to kidnap you here too. I don't see much of a difference of trust to meet someone here in the US compared to someone overseas.

 

I didn't mention shot or killed, just being held kidnapped for money or robbed. When I meet women in America from online, I don't mention item or money to avoid being placed in those types of situations.

 

By the way you never answered my questions, so I guess you haven't seriously planned out the future.

 

1)How do you plan to visit her again, if everything goes well?

2)How will you help financially sponsor her visa?

3)Does her standards matter at all?

(language she speaks, hobbies, future goals, etc.,.)

4)Is she saving any money to see you or to come to USA?

5)Where is she from?

 

I'm not against you doing this, I just think you should check out more women before investing in this one, because it's only going to get more expensive if you do decide to bring her back.

[d0nnivain]

Now you can't. How can you record a live video and respond to my questions. Impossible. I don't believe you. I think you went overboard. Pictures yes I can see but video no. I believe most people here would agree with me on that.

 

It's faked by having one person on screen . . . the pretty one & somebody else pulling the strings.

 

 

Just be careful & skeptical.

[logan415]

OP, are you wanting to meet this woman because you're truly drawn/attracted to her and you think you want a possible future with her, or is she just finally someone you feel like you can be intimate with?

 

Because I can understand and respect the first, but the later just seems so clinical, and ... unnecessary. Like you're really going to go through the gigantic rigamarole of traveling to Belarus, and spend all that money to meet a woman you feel may have "solid interest?"

 

Now, I'm not saying this because it never happens (people do have extraordinary, long-distance love stories), I'm just wondering if you've really pinpointed your true motivations for meeting her. Right now it sounds like, in your mind, she's your only hope, and that's just statistically untrue. There are almost 160 million women in the United States alone. I'm almost positive that if you made the effort, you could find someone closer.

 

This all just seems incredibly risky. To lay down $5,000+ dollars for what would essentially be a first date? What if it doesn't work out? Then you're out $5,000 and still alone. Never mind the personal safety risks that may or may not exist.

 

Look, I'm not saying it doesn't happen. Just the other week I shared an airplane row with a middle-aged American dude and his somewhat younger fiancee, who had an Eastern European accent. They seemed happy.

 

Just don't be rash with this.

 

 

I'm truly interested in her. One of things that stick out to me is our different backgrounds but we seem to be interested in the same things. We both like tennis, watching horror movies, and she like some of the same video games that I play. I will admit that exotic factor is part of the driving force.

 

I want to point out that I do not think any bad about American women. I think there is some pretty damn hot American women where I live and elsewhere in the states.

 

I will have to say that American women are alpha females so they are typically more aggressive and I just don't fit in. I don't hardly see any Beta females and the ones I do see are typically Asian but they won't touch anything that is not white least from my experience. I'm mixed and have a brown skin tone.

[TheTraveler]

Go for it! Why not try? What is the worst that can happen? It fails? Big deal, just do it!

[gaius]

I really don't mean to be mean, but the truth is if you can't find any woman here who's interested in you in your current state then part of what this girl from Belarus probably finds attractive is the fact you offer her something other than poverty stricken Belarus. =/

 

If that's the case and you don't care anyway then you need some kind of work that's going to pay you enough to support two people and maybe fly back and forth back to her home once in a while. You're only setting yourself up for failure if you're in a position where you can't even afford one trip over there on your own. It's probably not what she's looking for.

 

Best case scenario I see happening, you e-panhandle your way over there, maybe even get to lose your virginity, then you end up going your separate ways and you're right back in the place you started. If you really think you deserve love then work for it, either by improving your personality when it comes to women or increasing your earning power. Use GoFundMe to go back to school, not to the former soviet union.

 

I've run across plenty of guys with horrendous personalities, to the point their mothers should have put them in a basket and let them float down river when they were kids, that use their finances to compensate for that, so it's always a valid option.

[carhill]

OP, I'll share a tip I got from my interpreter, who was a Russian citizen working in Ukraine interpreting for the government and whom I helped on nuances of 'political' English after her work with me in my endeavors. It's pretty simple, since she was an older woman and had seen a lot of the 'mail order bride' stuff and scams.

 

With any woman you meet in person, express interest in their home country and that moving to it is always on the table. One, it shows respect for the country they reside in. Two, it shows you're open to options. Three, and most importantly, if they're looking for a meal ticket out of poverty, they know that you coming to live and work in their homeland, if poverty stricken, won't be that meal ticket so they'll terminate relations and you'll be saved a potential scam.

 

I kept in touch with some guys who did expat and have been living with their wives in the FSU for over a decade. They found good women and made it work, even if their standard of living changed somewhat. It's all relative.

[Timshel]

I really don't mean to be mean, but the truth is if you can't find any woman here who's interested in you in your current state then part of what this girl from Belarus probably finds attractive is the fact you offer her something other than poverty stricken Belarus. =/

 

If that's the case and you don't care anyway then you need some kind of work that's going to pay you enough to support two people and maybe fly back and forth back to her home once in a while. You're only setting yourself up for failure if you're in a position where you can't even afford one trip over there on your own. It's probably not what she's looking for.

 

Best case scenario I see happening, you e-panhandle your way over there, maybe even get to lose your virginity, then you end up going your separate ways and you're right back in the place you started. If you really think you deserve love then work for it, either by improving your personality when it comes to women or increasing your earning power. Use GoFundMe to go back to school, not to the former soviet union.

 

I've run across plenty of guys with horrendous personalities, to the point their mothers should have put them in a basket and let them float down river when they were kids, that use their finances to compensate for that, so it's always a valid option.

 

Wait, what? I have the most difficult time deciphering wtf did say on LS. My fault entirely.

I don't get this in bold, please clarify.

[gaius]

Wait, what? I have the most difficult time deciphering wtf did say on LS. My fault entirely.

I don't get this in bold, please clarify.

Just that some guys don't have a personality type that attracts women in a sexual manner, so they end up using their finances to attract them instead. And some women have priorities other than base attraction or connection, so it works out for both of them.

 

I'll show you the old friend on my Facebook tommorow that has a picture of him sitting with a few mail order Philippine women. He would be one of the guys that falls into that category.

[kendahke]

Now you can't. How can you record a live video and respond to my questions. Impossible. I don't believe you. I think you went overboard. Pictures yes I can see but video no. I believe most people here would agree with me on that.

 

On facebook, look up "the Original Scammer Phantom" and read her story about how her scammer used Skype by editing a bunch of images together and using that as he was talking to her.

 

Yes, it can be done. You don't want to believe it, which one would expect for you to jump into denial mode because you want what you want, but yes, it can be done.

 

There is a fool-proof method of finding the location of a scammer and it's by uploading a video to your youtube channel and not making it public--it can be viewed by who you want by sending them the link to the video. Make sure they looked at it by asking them something in the video that they can only answer by watching it. In 3 days, go into Google analytics for the video and see from where the video was viewed. That is how I caught my scammer. This is how you will know with 100% certainty that the person you're talking to is in fact the person you're talking to. With long distance, you can never take their word for granted that they're telling the truth. And there are romance scammers in eastern Europe, too, not only the African continent.

Edited December 30, 2015 by kendahke

[logan415]

I really don't mean to be mean, but the truth is if you can't find any woman here who's interested in you in your current state then part of what this girl from Belarus probably finds attractive is the fact you offer her something other than poverty stricken Belarus. =/

 

If that's the case and you don't care anyway then you need some kind of work that's going to pay you enough to support two people and maybe fly back and forth back to her home once in a while. You're only setting yourself up for failure if you're in a position where you can't even afford one trip over there on your own. It's probably not what she's looking for.

 

Best case scenario I see happening, you e-panhandle your way over there, maybe even get to lose your virginity, then you end up going your separate ways and you're right back in the place you started. If you really think you deserve love then work for it, either by improving your personality when it comes to women or increasing your earning power. Use GoFundMe to go back to school, not to the former soviet union.

 

I've run across plenty of guys with horrendous personalities, to the point their mothers should have put them in a basket and let them float down river when they were kids, that use their finances to compensate for that, so it's always a valid option.

 

 

Truth is women in America are mostly Aplha females. So they are very outgoing, down hard party girls and enjoy going to dance clubs and drinking alcohol. This girl I'm talking is not a party person, and she kind of like me pretty shy. I just cannot connect with American women because of the interest. For instance I talk to this girl online about weather, places and culture. For American girl she will find that boring.

 

Lot of American women I met when taking to them they are like yeah yeah uh huh uh huh. This girl she is engaging to the conversation. I can carry on a conversation with her without long silences. I cannot do that with American women. And no there is nothing wrong with me. What this tells me is that I was boring in the wrong country, I had different goals and taste than what American women want in their men. I'm not the American woman type of man.

[logan415]

On facebook, look up "the Original Scammer Phantom" and read her story about how her scammer used Skype by editing a bunch of images together and using that as he was talking to her.

 

Yes, it can be done. You don't want to believe it, which one would expect for you to jump into denial mode because you want what you want, but yes, it can be done.

 

There is a fool-proof method of finding the location of a scammer and it's by uploading a video to your youtube channel and not making it public--it can be viewed by who you want by sending them the link to the video. Make sure they looked at it by asking them something in the video that they can only answer by watching it. In 3 days, go into Google analytics for the video and see from where the video was viewed. That is how I caught my scammer. This is how you will know with 100% certainty that the person you're talking to is in fact the person you're talking to. With long distance, you can never take their word for granted that they're telling the truth. And there are romance scammers in eastern Europe, too, not only the African continent.

 

If I have to do this then I will be putting on a label telling her I cannot trust her. You don't wanna piss off a Russian woman because she will let you have it and have it real good.

[logan415]

Just that some guys don't have a personality type that attracts women in a sexual manner, so they end up using their finances to attract them instead. And some women have priorities other than base attraction or connection, so it works out for both of them.

 

I'll show you the old friend on my Facebook tommorow that has a picture of him sitting with a few mail order Philippine women. He would be one of the guys that falls into that category.

 

 

I'm not buying her. I don't know what is all with the judgement of me wanting to go meet this woman. For example, people leave their home town for a career in a different location. So do those people have no skills for jobs in their location? May be its because its a job they actually feel they will enjoy and fit into.

[TunaCat]

I'm not buying her. I don't know what is all with the judgement of me wanting to go meet this woman.

 

I think people are just wanting you to be careful about this.

 

For me personally, I say go meet this woman, you never know what might happen. BUT you should not be using other people's money to do so.