Old Maids in the future will be men

[oldshirt]

A couple weeks ago in another thread I talked about how changing gender demographics are changing the landscape for men and how it is affecting all these 25 year old virgin guys that are always whining on here.

 

 

I wanted to address that issue a little more specifically and talk a little more on how that is going to get worse going into the future.

 

 

In a nutshell, more [boy] babies are born than girl babies. I'm not going to mention any numbers but all of this is public library information in general. In the past boy babies and young children had higher death rates in boys than girls. Then due to things like child farm and industrial labor, young males succumbed to farming and accidental deaths at a much higher rate than girls.

 

 

By the teen years, things like violence, accidents, risk taking behaviors and suicide killed off many more males than females.

 

 

Then by upper teen and young adulthood, there were the great wars of generations past. I am a veteran myself so I won't diminish pain and suffering of our service members and their families, but if today if a roadside bomb kills 5 servicemembers it's headline news.

 

 

where as in the days of Camden (revolutionary war battle) Gettysburg, Shiloh, Bellow Wood, D-day, Battle of the Bulge, Iwo jima, Inchon, La Drang Valley etc could kill a thousand or more young men in a day.

 

 

So in our grandparents and beyond era, by the time a young adult male returned home alive, he was a survivor that was outnumbered by the number of women available.

 

 

then add to that that alcoholism was a million times more prevalent and more severe which left many men basically useless blobs on the street and the fact that in the days before OSHA and occupational safety and labor laws countless men were killed and disabled on the job.

 

 

When you add all of that up, in our grandparents generation and for countless generations before that, a man that made it to adulthood that was sober and had a source of income was a fine catch and basically had his pick of the "ladies in waiting."

 

 

The only men that were overlooked were chronic, falling down alcoholics, in prison or were chronically unemployed and living on the street.

 

 

During those times there were also what were known as "old maids." Old maids were basically left over women that didn't get a chair and were left standing when the music stopped. They were the left over women that didn't marry in Judeo-Christian cultures that subscribed to monogamous matings and marriage.

 

 

In other cultures they would have been absorbed into basically harems or plural marriages along with other wives to one man. But in monogamous Judeo-Christian societies, they were left overs.

 

 

This is all going to be turned upside down going into the future however. In the very near future, if not already, adult men are going to significantly outnumber women.

 

 

We are already having 25, 30, and 40 year old virgins whining about not being able to find a mate. That trend is going to get worse.

 

 

It will soon become common for every community to have a number of old maid men that are unable to pair-bond and will be left over.

 

 

The old maid women of yesteryear really didn't cause many problems. many stayed at home with their parents, some moved in with their married sisters and their families and some moved out west to become mail order brides and the ones left over after that became prostitutes in the oil towns and gold towns in the developing west.

 

 

The wives of yesteryear probably didn't like all the old maids around because they were afraid they'd try to get their hooks into their husbands but other than that they didn't cause many real problems.

 

 

Single males on the other DO cause societal problems in a community. Single males drink and carouse and fight and will support redlight districts of strippers and whorehouses etc and will always be trying to score off someone else's chick.

 

 

In generations past, mothers and parents would bring up their daughters on how to primp and preen themselves and how to dress attractively and how to act and behave in a manner that would make her competitive for the available males.

 

 

Boys on the other hand were pretty much brought up that as long as they were a good person (aka "nice") and as long as they were employed and somewhat sober, they would be able to get a nice and attractive wife and for most men of that caliber, it turned out to be true.

 

 

That will not be true going into the future however. It will not be enough for a man to be nice, sober and employed to get a wife of any desirability.

 

 

The future man is going to have to develop a lot more desirable traits that simply being decent, employed and sober. He is going to have to be fit, well groomed and styled, well dressed, well educated, very well employed, have good social graces and interpersonal skills, will have to be competitive and dominant and will have to be able to both work collaboratively with other men as well as be able to fight off other men and keep other men out of his mate's pants.

 

 

Men of the future are going to have to put as much time, energy and effort into being attractive to opposite sex as what our great grandmothers did to get men's attention.

 

 

The men of the future will be attending college to get their M.R. degree as women once did to get their M.R.S. degree.

 

 

And there will still be men left over. "bachelor" and more specifically "eligible bachelor" was a term used in days of yore to designate a man that was technically unmarried but was still marriage material and a viable candidate for marriage. In the future there will be another term unmarried men that are simply left over as were the old maids of yesteryear.

 

 

In days of yore terms like 'bums' and 'losers' were used to describe adult men that couldn't get a mate, but in days of yore only the most drunk or the most unemployable weren't able to get a mate.

 

 

In the future even some kind, considerate, clean, sober, law abiding, educated and gainfully employed men will be unable to secure a mate. A new vocabulary word will need to be developed soon for the old maid males of the future.

Edited December 30, 2015 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Clarified statement

[AspenBaldwin]

They could just marry foreigners instead... it seems the white man has a thing for asian girls.

[oldshirt]

They could just marry foreigners instead... it seems the white man has a thing for asian girls.

 

Asian men already outnumber women to good degree.

[Gloria25]

I'm sorry, but IMO and from what I see - especially in my hood, women now a days put no expectations on men and are more than happy to be half or primary breadwinner, to the point they are so quick to dump their kids off to others to watch so they can continue to make money for the failure of a guy they shack-up with, marry, and/or have kids with.

 

All these guys have to have is a penis and a pulse and these women are desperate to tie them down.

 

Some of these guys don't even have a decent car to drive, still have their parents coming over to cook, clean, etc for them.

 

The sad part about this too is that parents are voluntarily "paying" for these women to marry and stay with these loser guys. I mean, whose parents come to decorate and set up your first (or any of their grandkids' room), cut your grass, etc?

 

And they're so proud to wear the "mommy" and "wife" title - yet have parents footing the bills for stuff their "man" should rise to the occasion to do .

 

So, between the women volunteering to be FBs, FWBs, shack-ups, and/or married to guys who haven't graduated into manhood, the only guys who are gonna end up "old maids" are the ones who probably come to LS complaining about having to actually get up and speak to a woman without wetting their pants...meh, but even those guys still muster up enough courage to talk to and pork Petunias out there who are also just equally happy they found a male who showed them a little attention for once in their lives.

 

There's a lid for every garbage can out there ya know?

[thefooloftheyear]

Eh...I dunno....

 

Right now the world is inundated with un-masculine girly-men who were probably raised either by single mothers or parents who believed in gender neutrality... These guys seem to be the least attractive, and the ones who cant get laid..

 

The imbalance will probably correct itself at some point...these things often do.....

 

Maybe we'll be like Spotted Hyenas where the females are the dominant gender...I dunno...By that time I'll be dead...

 

The good news here is that if you are a true Alpha type of man with masculine tendencies, you have little competition from these other guys, and move to the front of the line with many women, even progressive types...And no, you don't have to be highly educated or rich....There are inmates and "bad boys" that have women fighting over them..even good looking, wealthy and educated women...

 

I guess we'll see...I will say that I never remember guys from my era bemoaning of lack of success with women or getting laid like the posts I read on here..It was unheard of...Some of the most low level guys out there at the time were still finding takers..

 

I dunno....

 

TFY

[losangelena]

Great, old-maid men to go with the old-maid ladies. Except that the old-maid men don't want the old-maid ladies, they want the model ladies.

[oldshirt]

To both Gloria and Fool, I think what you are referring to is actually a symptom of what I am talking about. and that is the demasculinization of males today.

 

 

I'm almost 52 years old and I am probably of the first generation where males outnumbered females in the adult populace.

 

 

I can testify from my own upbringing that I was raised to be "nice" and that all I had to do was get a job and stay somewhat sober and responsible and I would have a good, attractive wife.

 

 

I think guys are still be raised that way and it's probably even worse now that we've had 30 years of Oprah and political correctness and liberalism and feminism and probably some ism's we don't even have names for yet.

 

 

Yes women are clinging on to questionable dudes and their parents are probably glad they found them. .....but that's not because men are in short supply - it's because assertive, masculine men with balls are in short supply.

 

 

The other 90% of the male race is playing Xbox and lining up to the new Star Wars together.

 

 

They are still being told all they have to do is get a job and be 'nice' and they think that Beyoncé and her super model friends are going to walk in and try to take their game controller out of their hands and ravage them.

 

 

It's not until they reach their mid 20s and beyond that they are going to realize they are being left behind and then they'll come here whining.

[Gloria25]

Eh...I dunno....

 

Right now the world is inundated with un-masculine girly-men who were probably raised either by single mothers or parents who believed in gender neutrality... These guys seem to be the least attractive, and the ones who cant get laid..

 

TFY

 

Nah, these guys you describe are ideal for the "modern" woman now a days. He's desperate and will take what he can get...so instant sperm donor and bank account for those women out there who want a "partner" - rather than a "man" and a lover.

 

He'll have sex when/if she wants to cuz he ain't gonna (or can't believe that he can) get it elsewhere. She'll get lazy, overweight and fall in love with the kids he knocked her up with over him and if he dare say anything about it, she'll always threaten to leave and thanks to his mommy, he lacks a spine to pack her bags and tell her to leave.

 

So, guys like you described are a hot comodity now a days ad are getting married left and right. Now, when it comes to the "quality" of these marriages? Meh, the guy will sit around and make ten thousand denials/excuses for the mistake he made cuz sex in the dark, under the sheets with a sack of potatoes is once a month is better than nothing. Besides, some people can't be alone, they like roommates - especially ones called a "wife" now a days.

 

Oh, and these guys were such outcasts in high school now that they can join the ranks of "I got someone too", they aren't gonna give up that celebrity status - even if behind closed doors and all the Facebook pics, they are miserable as heck.

[Gloria25]

Great, old-maid men to go with the old-maid ladies. Except that the old-maid men don't want the old-maid ladies, they want the model ladies.

 

No they don't want "model ladies" cuz they make them "uncomfortable", so they'll pick up a potential old maid in her youth (a "3") and lock her down so as she continues her transition into an old maid, at least he got a few lays while she was young out of it....

 

All the while they obsess and stare at women they "wish" they could date like scared little boys.

[oldshirt]

To both Gloria and Fool, I think what you are referring to is actually a symptom of what I am talking about. and that is the demasculinization of males today.

 

 

 

Actually more specifically I am talking about that countless generations of men have been raised to believe all they have to do is be good people and get a job someday.

 

 

That has been part of the demasculinizing effect.

[Gloria25]

To both Gloria and Fool, I think what you are referring to is actually a symptom of what I am talking about. and that is the demasculinization of males today.

 

 

I'm almost 52 years old and I am probably of the first generation where males outnumbered females in the adult populace.

 

 

I can testify from my own upbringing that I was raised to be "nice" and that all I had to do was get a job and stay somewhat sober and responsible and I would have a good, attractive wife.

 

 

I think guys are still be raised that way and it's probably even worse now that we've had 30 years of Oprah and political correctness and liberalism and feminism and probably some ism's we don't even have names for yet.

 

 

Yes women are clinging on to questionable dudes and their parents are probably glad they found them. .....but that's not because men are in short supply - it's because assertive, masculine men with balls are in short supply.

 

 

The other 90% of the male race is playing Xbox and lining up to the new Star Wars together.

 

 

They are still being told all they have to do is get a job and be 'nice' and they think that Beyoncé and her super model friends are going to walk in and try to take their game controller out of their hands and ravage them.

 

 

It's not until they reach their mid 20s and beyond that they are going to realize they are being left behind and then they'll come here whining.

 

I disagree in part...cuz the guys sitting around playing Xbox ARE being chased by these women too and their parents are also pushing these guys to get hitched while they foot the bill cuz the parents want the "image" of their offspring having grandkids and all that AT ALL COSTS (even if the son marries a "3" and/or they're financing the marriage/family of their sons and daughters).

 

Also, for many of the reasons you mentioned in your OP, women have always outnumbered men - that is nothing new. Maybe that's why we are very competitive with our looks, cattyness, etc...and, in some religions/cultures men were/are allowed to take up more than one wife.

[basil67]

It will not be enough for a man to be nice, sober and employed to get a wife of any desirability.

 

Of course. If his only assets are being nice, sober and employed he's punching above his weight if he wants a woman who is broadly considered desirable.

 

If she's got a great sense of humour, is motivated, educated, charming and highly employable - why would she settle for a guy who is simply 'nice, sober and employed?

 

Even when I was dating back in the day (I didn't possess an education, I had a job instead of a career and I've always been a bit lacking in the charm stakes) I would expect a man to share my sense of humour, be generally sociable, positive attitude, dress well and be active.

 

In short, if a guy's assets are being nice, sober and employed he needs to up his ante. At the very least, he needs to be interesting.

[Under The Radar]

And here I thought that joining a giant party of night elves and exploring the Tower of Azora together was alpha as **** ...... Oh well ...... back to the drawing board.

 

LOL

[Imported]

There always seems to be a lot of available women. I don't think this will be a problem.

 

Some guys are going to lose out, but that's always been the case. I never married and I doubt I will, but I don't consider myself an "old maid" at all. Far from it.

[preraph]

Admittedly, I only skimmed that, but I think you may be on to something. Also, women have more options now and don't all feel it necessary to partner up permanently with a man.

 

I don't think it's entirely one sided though. Just because of the internet, there are lots of young men and women who didn't learn to socialize in person - and that's the only way to make babies, folks. Face to face interaction is becoming scary to people who aren't used to it. As is physical exercise.

[lollipopspot]

This is all going to be turned upside down going into the future however. In the very near future, if not already, adult men are going to significantly outnumber women.

 

Can you give some hard data showing that men are going to significantly outnumber women in the US?

[ltjg45]

Admittedly, I only skimmed that, but I think you may be on to something. Also, women have more options now and don't all feel it necessary to partner up permanently with a man.

 

I don't think it's entirely one sided though. Just because of the internet, there are lots of young men and women who didn't learn to socialize in person - and that's the only way to make babies, folks. Face to face interaction is becoming scary to people who aren't used to it. As is physical exercise.

 

Well, I have met a few males that is just very awkward to be around in person.

 

Like, 2 of my "closest" friends is weird, even in my own words, which says a lot. One is a proud jerk that loves pissing people off for his own entertainment and I do all I can to keep my distance from him. Also, I am basically the only person that is willing to even listen to him. That is how annoying he is.

 

The 2nd loves to come to me while I am working and start laughing like crazy. He does this rather often and it is just so random.

 

Of course, both of them has no women chasing them either and they isn't the quiet type like I am.

 

As for me, I got no issue with in-person interaction. I just don't have a reason to actually pursue it. People here is quick to judge you harshly these days.

[Tayla]

just for clarity sake: Being responsible, respecting, employed is demasculating men?

 

Being raised in a single parent household with values and manners will send them down the singlehood life?

 

Who spiked this kool aid to come up with this theory?

[mrldii]

Can you give some hard data showing that men are going to significantly outnumber women in the US?

 

According to this actual research, it appears it may already be happening in some limited U.S. locations...especially in the deep south.

 

If the males are unemployed and living in those areas, they might want to start collecting cats to keep them company in their old age.

 

Mapping the Marriage Market for Young Adults | Pew Research Center

[oldshirt]

just for clarity sake: Being responsible, respecting, employed is demasculating men?

 

No.

 

 

My point was raising boys that being a good person, sober and employed was enough to get a partner is shortchanging them on many of the other facets of manhood and masculinity.

[oldshirt]

Can you give some hard data showing that men are going to significantly outnumber women in the US?

 

 

 

Just go to the 2010 US Census page. Males outnumber females until the age 35-39 bracket.

[lollipopspot]

Just go to the 2010 US Census page. Males outnumber females until the age 35-39 bracket.

 

Well if that's true, then the "old maids" will be women, because there will be more "older" (35+) women than men, no?

[Poutrew]

I'm old enough, and single enough, to see how my male friends of decades past have faired with the 'family life'. It is easy to see what I have missed not being married, and what I have gained by being single. Let's see: I have missed not having a steady supply of built-in sex (a bummer, I admit). I have also missed: divorce, child support payments, alimony, acrimonious relationships that have long soured, paternity tests, wage garnishments, etc. My married male friends are beginning to hate me.

 

What I have gained: A nice bank account (Only myself to spend money on). Freedom to see whomever I want whenever I want. Beautiful solitude. No ties that bind... the realization I have slowly come to is that the laws favor older men over younger men - A greedy wife can't touch anything you already have prior to marriage. As opposed to a young guy who has to fork over half of everything he has to a wife who has been there from the beginning of his adult working life, so Even if I do decide to marry at some future point, I remain economically independent unless I am dumb enough to put the lady's name on the deed... I am finding the older I am getting, the more fun I am having.

 

Now, I will admit that if I could have found a good, moral, spouse, whom I could love and who would be able to honestly love me back, so that I could have lived an Ozzie-and-Harriet kind of middle class life, then that would have been my idea of paradise. But it didn't happen, so I'm not too busted up about it.

Edited December 30, 2015 by Poutrew

[TheArtist]

I'll admit that I didn't read the whole thing but I think I get the gist of it. Personally I think people like this have always been around, it's just that they have an outlet: the internet.

 

The same goes for people who can't spell and I think, 'My god, how are you in your 40s and still spell it defiantly?! It's definitely!', or people who can't do simple mathematics and are proud of it. Or adult colouring books. I mean, seriously?!

 

The internet has just given those people a voice and I don't think it's any different to how it ever was. Nature finds a balance and this stuff simply leaves more women for me to be rejected by. I mean, for me to date. Yeah.

[Snakechammah]

Well the 25-year-old virgin men can always date an old-maid cougar...

 

Wouldn't that solve the problem?