canisthenix Posted December 30, 2015 Share Posted December 30, 2015 i don't get this "positive thinking" trend in society that says people can never be unhappy. or those who are chronically unhappy should be discarded. erm..why? what ever happened to compassion and tolerance? maybe it's just simple thinking, but then if somebody is unhappy, console them. if their chronically unhappy, then they clearly have an issue, especially if you try and guide them to being more able/content. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Alamo657 Posted December 30, 2015 Share Posted December 30, 2015 i don't get this "positive thinking" trend in society that says people can never be unhappy. or those who are chronically unhappy should be discarded. erm..why? what ever happened to compassion and tolerance? maybe it's just simple thinking, but then if somebody is unhappy, console them. if their chronically unhappy, then they clearly have an issue, especially if you try and guide them to being more able/content. People are busy leading their lives, they need/want positive vibes around them, because that's what modern world is all about : it needs to be a permanent feat, an all time high, you can have downs but most of your life must be up, or higher. Or it means you're a looser, and you're not worthy of friendship, love, or simple attention. The worst thing that can happen in life is not dying, it's being all alone. Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted December 30, 2015 Share Posted December 30, 2015 Form my own point of view, Unhappiness and depression are two separate issues, which are often confused and mistaken one for the other. It's important for all concerned, first and foremost (and this includes the person in question) to decide whether it is unhappiness or depression. The two are inextricably linked.... There was a theory, originally expounded as a 'psychological fact' that a feeling of grief, sadness, anger, whatever, directly connected and associated with a specific incident, only lasts, per se, for around 12 minutes. Any further emotional response is actually self-generated. That notion has been discounted, it seems. What is true, is that ANY emotional pain in general (including Unhappiness) can be looked at as self-affliction to begin with. Emotional pain is any pain stemming from "emotion." And we experience emotions as a result of how we perceive events in our lives. So technically if we were able to change our automatic cognitive interpretation of our circumstances, we would be able to control any and all of our feelings. The trick is to observe the emotion as it arises, understand its source is rooted in our own perception, and work back to evaluate the direct trigger for our "loss of Control". Emotions do not define WHO we are. They are transitory and transitional. Therefore, it is also helpful to disassociate one's self from the emotion. To not say, "I am unhappy". But instead, change that observation to "I am experiencing Unhappiness". Link to post Share on other sites
Author canisthenix Posted December 30, 2015 Author Share Posted December 30, 2015 People are busy leading their lives, they need/want positive vibes around them, because that's what modern world is all about : it needs to be a permanent feat, an all time high, you can have downs but most of your life must be up, or higher. Or it means you're a looser, and you're not worthy of friendship, love, or simple attention. The worst thing that can happen in life is not dying, it's being all alone. well i disagree. if that makes me not part of "the modern world" so be it. Link to post Share on other sites
William Posted December 30, 2015 Share Posted December 30, 2015 Folks, this thread was posted by one of our previously banned and banned members so they're gone but the content, of a general nature, is valid so due to a member request I've republished the thread for discussion within our guidelines. Do not expect any responses from the thread starter and be sure to alert us if any non-conforming responses appear. Thanks! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
TaraMaiden2 Posted December 30, 2015 Share Posted December 30, 2015 Comment not addressed to OP: merely a response to content.i don't get this "positive thinking" trend in society that says people can never be unhappy. or those who are chronically unhappy should be discarded. erm..why? To be honest, I personally have not come across the trend. On the contrary, it seems people are being far more open, honest and less reluctant to admit to un-ease, distress and general malaise or dissatisfaction. In fact, acceptance of clinical and diagnosed depression is getting a high-profile exposure, in some places. what ever happened to compassion and tolerance? While many are compassionate and tolerant, not everyone is equipped with comprehension skills, and there are still too many people who feel a suitable response to a depressed person is to tell them to 'snap out of it', or words and intentions to that effect.... maybe it's just simple thinking, but then if somebody is unhappy, console them. if their chronically unhappy, then they clearly have an issue, especially if you try and guide them to being more able/content. I would think it wise to consider some factors here: Distinguishing between the professional whinger and emotional vampire, and the authentic distressed and troubled individual who seeks and merits wholehearted support and assistance. There is also the person who cannot either positively help themselves, or is unconsciously 'stuck' in a negative attitude, because they find more comfort in that habit, than breaking the mould and working for themselves, on themselves. Finally, it's important that those exercising Compassion, exercise Wise Compassion, not Idiot Compassion. The first supports and empowers. The second, perpetuates and enables, negatively. Link to post Share on other sites
pureinheart Posted December 30, 2015 Share Posted December 30, 2015 i don't get this "positive thinking" trend in society that says people can never be unhappy. or those who are chronically unhappy should be discarded. erm..why? I agree, and think the PT is just a little over the top, although if one wants to pick the truth out of PT, then it can work as far as attitude goes... and I think attitude is the key to everything. Anyone who thinks people will never be unhappy is just not dealing with reality on any level, and personally, I would choose to stay away from them and that thinking. Those who are unhappy all of the time either need an attitude adjustment or they need help. Long term therapy can help, although it is up to the person to work the program. Therapy or no therapy one has to change their mind. This takes time- lots of time. what ever happened to compassion and tolerance? It seems to have gone out of the window for the most part. I think most are overwhelmed. When I went through one of those unhappy times, people got tired of hearing my mess- I brought them down most likely. maybe it's just simple thinking, but then if somebody is unhappy, console them. if their chronically unhappy, then they clearly have an issue, especially if you try and guide them to being more able/content. You would think, right? But how can a depressed/unhappy person help another in that same sitch ... most people these days are in need of encouragement and the encouragers are burned out and need it too... vicious cycle. Link to post Share on other sites
Tayla Posted December 30, 2015 Share Posted December 30, 2015 A pessimist complains about the wind ( dread) The Optimist expects it to change. (hope) The realist adjusts the sails. ( Resilience) ^^ This pretty much gives an idea of the topic. Link to post Share on other sites
spiderowl Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 i don't get this "positive thinking" trend in society that says people can never be unhappy. or those who are chronically unhappy should be discarded. erm..why? what ever happened to compassion and tolerance? maybe it's just simple thinking, but then if somebody is unhappy, console them. if their chronically unhappy, then they clearly have an issue, especially if you try and guide them to being more able/content. I couldn't agree more. It's a trend, like any other. While it's good to feel positive and happy (and people are lucky if they do feel that way), not everyone does all of the time. Also, it has the negative effect of people being wildly optimistic and ignoring warning signs that all is not well or that some plan is not going to work. I would far rather have someone realistic in charge of any project/plan that affects people/the planet than a wildly optimistic person. Being able to assess the true situation and enable something more positive to come of it is a talent. Link to post Share on other sites
NGC1300 Posted January 10, 2016 Share Posted January 10, 2016 i don't get this "positive thinking" trend in society that says people can never be unhappy. or those who are chronically unhappy should be discarded. erm..why? People need to know everything is ok, even if it isn't. Why else would someone have faith in the imaginary, if not for the promise of eternal life? I've seen people literally lie (potentially) to their friends or family members diagnosed with cancer. Saying "you will beat this". Um, what if they can't or won't???? Must be nice to lie to people in their final days. But hey, truth doesn't matter to the optimist, only feeling good. Nobody wants to be burdened by the sniveling of the pessimist, even if they're 100% right. Look at the sheer volume of self help material and books on the market. Clearly, life is an intrinsic burden. Too short, too painful, and too much drudgery to really make it worthwhile. The proliferation of 'positive thinking' is evidence in itself of this. If life was intrinsically good, we wouldn't need perpetual reinforcement and reaffirmation that it is good. It would just be good. But it isn't. Link to post Share on other sites
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