Meeting my partners (nudist, yes nudist) parents.

[AlexXTC]

I suppose the essence of the question I have is how do you deal with your partners family’s idiosyncrasies?

 

That’s probably a fairly basic question to answer in most cases but I think this situation takes the cake.

 

I have been seeing my partner for 9 months now, we have a great relationship. She was very honest with me once we started to get serious and told me about her family’s “quirks” as she calls them. Without beating around the bush they are nudists. To be honest I couldn’t care less what other people do as long as they don’t hurt others and I quite like the fact the fact that my partner feels comfortable walking around the house topless or naked. I was told this was a lifestyle for them and when I met them to be prepared. At the time I pretty much laughed it off as I was not likely to meet them anytime soon (we live interstate).

 

So over the Christmas/New Year period we were off to visit them. My gf warned me time after time what to expect but I thought I can handle a few topless women walking around.

 

They answered the door when we arrived fully clothed and we all sat around talking for an hour or so. I actually thought that maybe I had been set up as nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Then it just all changed in a matter of half an hour. Her sister arrived with her family, then her cousins with their families. There was probably 25-30 people there. Then someone wanted to use the pool as it was so hot (we are in Australia, it’s summer here) and they all literally just stripped off. I didn’t know where to look or what to do, they all got a great laugh out of it and told me I’d get used to it. Let me tell, I didn’t. It’s one thing looking at a 40something potential month-in-law but where do you look when it’s a 16yo girl. I didn’t feel comfortable at all.

 

Even sitting around the campfire later that night they are all naked, it’s just totally normal to them. There is nothing sexual about it at all but as an introduction to it, it was overwhelming.

 

We are back home now so I have until next Christmas until I have to deal with it again. How would other people deal with this? Is it too rude to say I won’t go there again? I have very strong feelings for my gf, in fact a proposal is very much on the cards but I’m not sure I can live with this. Then again, as with anything, I’m sure you get used to it.

 

I’m not really expecting anyone to have life experience with this particular topic so I’m more just asking what do you think you would do?

[kgcolonel]

Alex....I may be able to help a little here. Nudism isn't for many but as a nudist....you made a very significant statement, it is not a sexual situation...many find this hard to believe but having been a practicing nudist i have found it to be very relaxing and liberating.

 

Our exposure to non-adults and young adults is something that has only been in a very limited level. I think that only you can determine if this is something you can adapt accept going forward. That being said, my personal belief is that if you are unable to accept this, it very likely will limit or end your relationship with your GF. That is her family and while you may not see them often, it is their lifestyle and their practice and she may feel judged if you're not at ease with this. Talk to her about where you are now and where she would expect / want you to be going forward.

[AlexXTC]

Alex....I may be able to help a little here. Nudism isn't for many but as a nudist....you made a very significant statement, it is not a sexual situation...many find this hard to believe but having been a practicing nudist i have found it to be very relaxing and liberating.

 

Our exposure to non-adults and young adults is something that has only been in a very limited level. I think that only you can determine if this is something you can adapt accept going forward. That being said, my personal belief is that if you are unable to accept this, it very likely will limit or end your relationship with your GF. That is her family and while you may not see them often, it is their lifestyle and their practice and she may feel judged if you're not at ease with this. Talk to her about where you are now and where she would expect / want you to be going forward.

 

I'm pretty much at ease with the nude aspect of it all. I have discussed with my gf going to a nudist resort and we have been to a nudist beach. I felt comfortable at the beach.

 

I just found it awkward with her family because these are potential in-laws. Seeing sisters or cousins naked giving each other a hug just seems totally different to me to two friends doing exactly the same. Even when they come to chat to me and they give me a hug it's almost like a guilty feeling as a nude woman is touching me even though my gf is standing right beside me. I'm sure, or rather hoping that is just a time and exposure thing.

 

May I ask how you got involved and how you first got used to it?

[LydiaLong]

Alex,

 

I would run as fast as I could.

[AlexXTC]

Alex,

 

I would run as fast as I could.

 

Just because they are nudists or for some other reasons?

[LydiaLong]

It's my own personal prejudice. There's something wrong with people who have to exhibit themselves all day long.

[Redfisher]

Alex,

 

I would run as fast as I could.

 

Kinda immature I think.

[WaitingForBardot]

It's my own personal prejudice. There's something wrong with people who have to exhibit themselves all day long.

Yeah, I mean if people were meant to be naked they'd have been born that way, right? ..lol..

 

Full disclosure, I came of age in the 60's-70's, and nudism was pretty common and the false equivalency between naked and sex hadn't been drilled into cultural psyche as it apparently has been now. That said, it wouldn't bother me, especially considering you would only encounter it occasionally.

[Rockdad]

You mentioned overwhelming. We were home nudist for 15 yrs. The wife would not allow and petrified for anyone to see her naked. We decided to see what the social side of nudism was about so we pulled our camper to a family orientated Club.

 

Within a couple hours she was over her anxiety about it. By the end of the visit she was a bit overwhelmed with all that she was taking in and had seen enough penis's for the weekend. We visited a few more times that summer, we got a great feel for what it was all about and have been members there for a few years now.

 

Not only did my shy conservative wife keep an open mind to even considerate it, she became a social nudist that host numerous home nude parties. In fact she was the first one with her clothes off at a Nude Year's Eve party.

 

Point being unless we are open to learn we will be uneducated in many areas of life.

[GunslingerRoland]

I'm imagining it'll get less awkward with time. You can control your eyes presumably if you were seeing your gfs attractive relatives in swimwear... the same will come with nudity.

 

 

Never been in a situation like that, although when my wife and I went to Europe for the first time, the fashion is so different there, it was kinda awkward at first, when her cousins were wearing totally see through shirts and swim tops... but after a couple of days, seeing the nipples all the time, just became the norm.

[preraph]

Did your gf also get naked? If so, you're in for a rocky ride. I was hoping that like most normal offspring, she'd rebel and want no part of her parents' pointy bits party. You should straight up ask her if she plans to bring her children into this when she has them. I wouldn't feel comfortable around them either and I am no prude. I just like a little more mystery than that.

[Toodaloo]

I confess! I like wandering about naked!

 

At my old house where no one would see I did it a lot!

 

I doubt I would want to do it in front of my parents or children but thats just me. I do regularly get changed in their kitchen (I live in mucky jeans - when there is a family funeral etc) and will strip to my underwear.

 

To be honest I think you just need time and practice at home.

 

Think about it you have spent your entire life thinking the world is flat (and that people should wear clothes unless having sexual intercourse) and now you have just discovered that its round (and that you future mother in law has breasts!).

 

Once it becomes normal you will look back and laugh at how stressed you were about it.

 

Just my personal view.

[acrosstheuniverse]

This is a tough one... on one hand I can see that it's their house, their gathering, their rules, but on the other hand I can't imagine why either they or your girlfriend put you in that situation meeting them for the first time. Could you not have just gone for a nice clothed lunch the day before or something? It's baptism by fire!

 

Did they expect you to take your clothes off too? Did your girlfriend also go nude?

 

This would be a dealbreaker for me. I'm no prude but I absolutely would not want to be spending time hanging around a bunch of nude people of all shapes and sizes, I would find it awkward and extremely offputting to any kind of social conversation, eating etc.! I guess whether or not I could handle it would be dependent on how often I was going to be in that situation. For one day per year, perhaps... any more than that, no. Each to their own but it's not something I think you should feel obliged to accept and embrace just because it's their own family culture.

[kgcolonel]

Being a nudist I also agree with Acrosstheuniverse in that 'to each their own". I was curious about the same thing as in is your GF a practicing nudist and what are her expectations of you going forward. Was it that you were in front of family that made you uncomfortable or the simple fact that extended nude time made this an issue?

 

Our first experience was at a nude beach where we knew no one. It was for us, great and that determined whether or not we would go into a more social facet. Our family however is not aware of our practice, not because of our feeling of any guilt but out of respect to not want them to feel uncomfortable. I can't say how I would feel about this around family.