ScienceGal Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 I liked a comment made on a local news page, then looked at the profile of the person who wrote it. I had one of those "wow, I wish I knew him" moments. But, since I don't know him, and it's not a dating app., what to do? Is there any non-creepy way to message him? Ideas? Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
Zippy2000 Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 Sometimes they ignore you and sometimes they will interact with you. You just need to make your intentions clear. I contacted someone on Facebookk years ago and we were FB friends for about 6 months and she then deleted me. Wacth out who you let into your life and the picture you see on their profile isnt always the person you are speaking to. I had anotehr experience when some tried to add me but the photo I recognised was an amatuer model. Stay safe. Sometimes no interaction is better than any intaeraction at all. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
TheArtist Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 I've actually dated a couple of people I first interacted with on Facebook, so it's well worth a go. It is risky allowing someone to see your details though, probably more so if you're female. There are a lot of creeps out there. Take caution in how many friends people have too. If they have more than about 200 then they're just collecting them and don't seem to have many strong connections with anyone, at least in my experience. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Zippy2000 Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 I've actually dated a couple of people I first interacted with on Facebook, so it's well worth a go. It is risky allowing someone to see your details though, probably more so if you're female. There are a lot of creeps out there. Take caution in how many friends people have too. If they have more than about 200 then they're just collecting them and don't seem to have many strong connections with anyone, at least in my experience. I agree with this. My brother met someone online 2 years ago. He found out this person decide to save images from my brother profile and set up a new identity! Needless to say my brother wasnt very happy about it and I m sure in some places its illegal to do so. After that experience he decided not use use his FB again. If yiu do use FB make sure you set up your friends as private. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ScienceGal Posted January 5, 2016 Author Share Posted January 5, 2016 I am not too worried about him being an identity thief, but your warning is noted. Also, it is Facebook, so I can message him without becoming "friends". My profile is private, so at this point he could see my profile photo, but that's about it. I don't know what to write though. Link to post Share on other sites
MoreAmore Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 Just message and say something about his comment. If he is interested at all he will pursue the conversation. You don't know if he is even single at this point so don't invest too much. I get random messages from people about my public comments on Facebook all the time, or friend requests. I am only creeped out by the blatant hitting on/appearance focused things. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ScienceGal Posted January 5, 2016 Author Share Posted January 5, 2016 Just message and say something about his comment. If he is interested at all he will pursue the conversation. You don't know if he is even single at this point so don't invest too much. I get random messages from people about my public comments on Facebook all the time, or friend requests. I am only creeped out by the blatant hitting on/appearance focused things. Ok, I did it! I told him I agree with the comments he made and that they made me laugh. And that the venture mentioned in the article "should be interesting". Woo! :-) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 I've actually dated a couple of people I first interacted with on Facebook, so it's well worth a go. It is risky allowing someone to see your details though, probably more so if you're female. There are a lot of creeps out there. Take caution in how many friends people have too. If they have more than about 200 then they're just collecting them and don't seem to have many strong connections with anyone, at least in my experience. 200? What about the ones with 1,000 plus? Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 Ok, I did it! I told him I agree with the comments he made and that they made me laugh. And that the venture mentioned in the article "should be interesting". Woo! :-) If you're not friends with someone on FB, and send a message, they might not receive it. It goes to the other folder. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ScienceGal Posted January 5, 2016 Author Share Posted January 5, 2016 If you're not friends with someone on FB, and send a message, they might not receive it. It goes to the other folder. Hmmm. I have received messages from non-friends before. Must be a preference/privacy setting? I wonder if the site would let me know that I cannot message since we're not friends. Link to post Share on other sites
TheArtist Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 If you're not friends it does go into another folder but doesn't give you the little red icon saying you have a message, so don't be disappointed if he doesn't respond immediately as it's hard to spot. It's happened to me too. Good luck, hope it works out! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ScienceGal Posted January 5, 2016 Author Share Posted January 5, 2016 Form what I am reading, the other inbox was discontinued a couple months ago. Now, users receive a message request instead. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 Form what I am reading, the other inbox was discontinued a couple months ago. Now, users receive a message request instead. I didn't know that. I guess you're good now. Hope it works out. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TheArtist Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 Form what I am reading, the other inbox was discontinued a couple months ago. Now, users receive a message request instead. Yeah, something like that. I'm not really popular enough to find out. I hope it's me that you're secretly messaging on there. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
TheArtist Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 OK, it's not. Meh. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author ScienceGal Posted January 5, 2016 Author Share Posted January 5, 2016 OK, it's not. Meh. Unfortunately, an entire ocean is between us :-( 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ZHguy Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 I had one of those "wow, I wish I knew him" moments. But, since I don't know him, and it's not a dating app., what to do? Is there any non-creepy way to message him? You know what, I have had such deep moments like that, like where I'm in public seeing someone who just walks by, it's either the way they walk, look, or the way they talk and sometimes even just what their talking about. *sigh* Sometimes I wish we were all five year olds, when we could just get up and talk to who the hell ever without being interrupted by social obstacles. Tell me how it went though, I want to know! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
hasaquestion Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 200? What about the ones with 1,000 plus? If you had Facebook in high school and college you will have a lot of Facebook friends. Trying to count people's Facebook friends and reach a conclusion about their personality like that is pretty meaningless. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Erik30 Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 If you don't have any mutual friends, your message will go to his "other" folder and he will receive no notification of it. (Like others already said) Nobody checks that on FB so he'll probably won't ever read it. However, it's possible to send a message straight to his inbox if you're willing to pay for it. It think it costs 50 cents. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ScienceGal Posted January 5, 2016 Author Share Posted January 5, 2016 If you don't have any mutual friends, your message will go to his "other" folder and he will receive no notification of it. (Like others already said) Nobody checks that on FB so he'll probably won't ever read it. However, it's possible to send a message straight to his inbox if you're willing to pay for it. It think it costs 50 cents. We have two mutual friends. And like I wrote above, it seems Facebook has recently done away with the other folder. I didn't see an option to pay anything. Link to post Share on other sites
TheArtist Posted January 5, 2016 Share Posted January 5, 2016 I've never seen a pay option either. You could reply to one of his posts at some point and subtly mention you've sent him a message. He might even get back to you on this one so don't panic just yet! Link to post Share on other sites
Author ScienceGal Posted January 5, 2016 Author Share Posted January 5, 2016 It shows it's been delivered, but not read. It's been 8 hours, which is a lot, but not everyone is connected to social media. Also, I can tell he does not use the messenger app., so maybe he will see it later. If it's still unread by tomorrow night, I'll assume he didn't open it, and possibly deleted it, since he doesn't know me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author ScienceGal Posted January 6, 2016 Author Share Posted January 6, 2016 He hasn't read it (he doesn't have messenger). If he still hasn't by tonight, what should I do? Option 1: send him a friend request Option 2: send a message to his company page (he owns his own business). I think this is worse than option 1. Option 3: do nothing. Let it go. Sigh.. Link to post Share on other sites
ZHguy Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 However, it's possible to send a message straight to his inbox if you're willing to pay for it. It think it costs 50 cents. If I was in her situation, what if the other person found out I paid 50 cents just to message them... embarrassing. Haha! Link to post Share on other sites
ZHguy Posted January 6, 2016 Share Posted January 6, 2016 (edited) He hasn't read it (he doesn't have messenger). If he still hasn't by tonight, what should I do? Option 1: send him a friend request Option 2: send a message to his company page (he owns his own business). I think this is worse than option 1. Option 3: do nothing. Let it go. Sigh.. There really is no harm in sending him a friend request.. go for it. And if he responds by thinking you're weird, then ditch him, cause then he's weird, and not the sociable gal you are. Edited January 6, 2016 by ZHguy Link to post Share on other sites
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