Should I?

[Dandy]

tl;dr-Ex and I broke up. A year a half has passed and I have done all the healing, NC, etc. Still have feelings for her.

 

 

 

 

Complete version-She's an ldr and "dated" for a year. We were supposed to meet but it never happened. We broke up and I attempted to do the NC thing and to heal for 5 months but she always texted me and I fell for it. I guess most of her texts were only sent when things weren't good with her bf/life. Every time she texted me I would tell her I didn't want her (even if I did), but like the forums say, its just better to give them silence. She stopped texting me, finally, 5 months after we broke up. Ever since the break up I did things that we are supposed to do. ex heal, talk with old and/or new friends, went on trips with family, got back into old hobbies, dealing with life, work, studies, etc. It has all been pretty eventful after she left. I even felt ready to go dating again and connected with some women. 1 of them was crazy and I blame Tinder for it. I met another girl and things were more stable and fun but I decided she wasn't really for me.

 

 

Fast forward some two months after breakup with latest ex and I find on Skype my ldr ex as if she was in my contacts. I thought she hacked me or something but it turns out that it was just a glitch. I ask her why she added me but she said she never did it. Anyway, fast forward to now and we are talking on good terms, maybe 3-4 times a week. The problem is that I realized I still have feelings for her. I realized this after she told me she would come to America for some work/study program. She asked me if I would meet with her but I told her that I didn't know. She pressed on for a little bit but let off the subject after I wouldn't answer. I am well aware that she may just be trying to push buttons or trying to find out if I'm in her hook. I won't think anything serious unless she's showing it. The other only thing she has said is that it feels like when we first started talking, fresh, new start, etc, which is not enough to jump straight in.

 

 

The question is-After some more time has passed, should I reconcile or attempt to? I can always just continue with my life and find someone new but I feel like want to pursue it and see where things go since we never met.

[samanil]

Hmm...you didn't give very many reasons NOT to pursue reconciliation. If you don't attempt, won't you also wonder what could have been? I personally would take the risk, instead of always wondering if it would have worked out.

[goldway90]

The Skype thing wasn't a glitch or anything you probably didn't remove her.

 

She's at least interested in meeting you and that's a good thing, you still like her so go for it, and please don't start getting all emotional talking about your feelings for her and whatever.

Now if you two meet just enjoy her company, treat like any other girl you meet. Don't talk about relationships, the past or anything just HAVE FUN. Don't try to lock her down into a relationship.

[Dandy]

I hate to dig up my own thread like this. However, I thought it was better than making a new thread with little information.

 

 

Anyway, I got played. Stupid me. Now she says it's too expensive to come to the US. And some months ago she became cold thanks to some guy she started talking to. The coming over to the US being to expensive coincides with her talking to someone else.

 

 

Moral of the story: Never believe an ex when they said they want to meet up, whether it was an LDR or real life relationship. They just want to know if you are in their hook.

 

 

I welcome the incoming crucifixions and rants about breaking NC and keeping NC.

[Tayla]

Never met?

Okay guide me on this process of bf/gf when it didn't carry elements that a healthy one would?

 

I had an ldr, and once we did meet, and dated when visiting did we make the commitment to establish a ldr for better and worse.

 

How was yours realistically grounded ?

 

I've gone five years nc with Johnny Depp and so far he's done the same ( actually he's gone 40 some years nc now that I think about it) I guess since we never met , the nc is easy Peasy So guess it's the same thing for you. count that blessing. Out of sight and all that stuff...