New intense relationship ended abruptly.

[nwlost]

Hey guys first post here.

 

Let me preface this post by saying that typically I would never do something like this. Typically when a girl breaks it off with me, I'm very cool about it. I really could not care less. But this one is special. I felt something very very powerful that has shaken me to my core and I have to do something to get her back.

 

So towards the end of November I started dating this girl. I'm 24 she's 20. She saw me at a friends party but never talked to me as she left early. The next day she sent me a friend request on facebook. She was very blunt and straight forward and right off the get go she tells me "look I'm going to be honest. I saw you at Cameron's party and I was star struck. I think you're so attractive it's intimidating." The feeling was mutual and we started dating.

 

I was very cautious to start off with, I've been hurt in a lot in the past and I always keep my guard up. But right from the get go she started expressing very deep and intense feelings for me. Sending me extensive texts late at night when I was asleep expressing profound feelings. She convinced me to drop my guard, and I caved. I started reciprocating her feelings.

 

She invited me up to her family's cabin for her family Christmas and we all had a great time. We got into our very first fight on the drive back from the cabin. When we got back home she told me she wanted some space. She came over the next day to drop my keys off (they got left behind). I asked her to not give up on me so soon and she said she wouldn't, and kissed me goodbye.

 

She wanted space. So we didn't talk for 3 days. No contact. Then she called me at night the third day, said she was sorry about the fight. That she 'has really strong feelings for me and just doesn't know what to do with them.' She said I could keep her in my life romantically as long as there's no labels for the time being. I agreed. This phone call was a huge relief and I was feeling so good about it. I maintained a positive attitude through out it and was not needy.

 

I continued giving her space and didn't speak to her the next day, and again she called me asking me how my day was etc etc. Then she asked me who this girl is that likes my facebook posts all the time. I explained she's just a friend, which she is. And that was that. Point being is that she was being jealous and obsessive (positives for me at the time because I felt like she was going to leave)

 

So new years comes and goes. I tried calling her. She wouldnt pick up. I texted her new years day and she was mean, cold, and distant. I said it sucked I couldn't wish her a happy new year. She replied saying 'You're just not the right fit for me and I don't wish to be romantically involved anymore'. I replied saying you need to be mature and call me, not do this over text. She called me and an argument ensued. It ended angrily and I hung up on her. She continued texting me, and calling me blowing my phone up. I told her to stop calling me.

 

That was the last of our communication. I thought it was a given she would delete me off of social media, but she hasn't. Not only that she changed her profile picture to a black and grey sad looking picture of her. And posts stuff like 'Listening to Remember Me by "" '.

 

We haven't had any contact for six days. What do I do guys? If I reach out to her I put the power back in her hands. But at the same time, I feel like it's pretty clear she's hurting right now and I run the risk of her losing feelings for good if I wait too long to make a move.

 

*To add a little more context, the sex has been amazing. She climaxed several times during every session. So the sex isn't the issue.

 

So according to her, I'm so attractive it intimidates her. The sex is amazing. She expressed really profound and deep feelings for me, before breaking it off suddenly.

 

This girl has completely thrown me for a loop. What do I do? Typically I would not care, especially after only dating for a month. But this one is really something special, and I have to do something here.

 

Advice? Throw a hail mary? Or a more slow and steady approach? I have to make something happen.

[nwlost]

The biggest dilemma I'm facing right now is this -

 

Some hurtful things were said on both sides during the break up call. Do I send her a brief apology to take away some of the anger/hurt she's feeling towards me, and then carry on with no contact? Or do I let it stew and say nothing?

[ExtraSpice]

The biggest dilemma I'm facing right now is this -

 

Some hurtful things were said on both sides during the break up call. Do I send her a brief apology to take away some of the anger/hurt she's feeling towards me, and then carry on with no contact? Or do I let it stew and say nothing?

 

I am going to be honest, I did not read through the whole post but as for your current dilemma this is my opinion.

 

I have said this before that it is very important to be careful about what you say in the heat of the moment. True or not those words have a lasting effect. Words do hurt people and they shape peoples view of how they think about you. If you feel like you said hurtful things that require an apology then by all means apologize. It takes a strong person to admit their mistake and offer an apology for it. But don't apologize in hopes of getting something in return. It should be an honest apology and then carry on.

[nwlost]

I am going to be honest, I did not read through the whole post but as for your current dilemma this is my opinion.

 

I have said this before that it is very important to be careful about what you say in the heat of the moment. True or not those words have a lasting effect. Words do hurt people and they shape peoples view of how they think about you. If you feel like you said hurtful things that require an apology then by all means apologize. It takes a strong person to admit their mistake and offer an apology for it. But don't apologize in hopes of getting something in return. It should be an honest apology and then carry on.

 

I appreciate the input. Thank you.

 

I know my original post is really long but I would highly appreciate if anyone took the time to read it and give feedback..

[kidm]

I am hard-pressed to find a reason for the breakup based on everything you've typed. Sounds like one of those girls who likes to orchestrate fake drama just for the sake of drama. A drama queen. I know her brand of crazy. They are not satisfied when things are going well and equate drama with passion. The first red flag was that the fact that she started professing deep feelings for you right off the bat, etc. Anyway, I don't know about this one. I guess you you can chase after her if you want to deal with theatrics indefinitely (and by the sounds of it, you can't because you also went bat sh$t crazy in response to her moodiness so maybe you two are two peas in a pod). I personally would run in the opposite direction.

[VeveCakes]

Yep, sounds like she wants to push you away to see if you will chase her or something. Lame and immature. She's only 20, probably not ready for those intense feelings.

[nwlost]

Yep, sounds like she wants to push you away to see if you will chase her or something. Lame and immature. She's only 20, probably not ready for those intense feelings.

 

Give her what she wants? Or maintain no contact?