Harry19 Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 I've been a 'surrogate boyfriend' to this girl for about 2 years. Nothing has ever happened physically. She knows i have feelings for her but we both choose to ignore that because its easier that way. She tells me she loves me all of the time and wants to spend a lot of time with me none of which i read too much into at this point as i convinced myself it was never going to happen for my sanity. We went out the other night she was talking about how she wants to meet someone in 2016. Later on and i dont think this was related she said 'we are more than just friends' i asked what she meant by that and typically i'd expect her to say oh we're best friends or you're like a brother to me but she didnt she dodged the question. We were both drunk at the time. Our friends say that we're like a couple all of the time so i asked what she thought about people saying that and she said 'they dont understand' and 'we're fine as we are'. When she said we were more than just friends it just felt different to all of the things she has said before and most of them do happen when we're drunk so it's not like i read too much into things all of the time. Any advice? I am seeing her at the weekend and could bring the conversation up sober i don't think it would be that awkward because i know we'll be friends regardless and i'd just rather do it when i wasn't drunk. Link to post Share on other sites
VeveCakes Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 What are you doing. You've been stuck in the friend zone for two years with all the hassle of a gf but none of the perks. The minute she finds a guy that interests you she will be replaced. Try and kiss her. If she goes for it you are in, if she doesn't, you need to quit fooling yourself and forgot this friend. It's just holding you back from finding love. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 Well, I don't know what your objectives is exactly... are you wanting to turn her into a real girlfriend? Personally I think you're swimming upstream if that's the case, but... you're going to have to take the risk and make a bold move. Kiss her like you mean it, and don't give her a chance to wiggle out. You'll probably get slapped hard but then, if you're lucky the ice will melt and the two of you live happily ever after. Link to post Share on other sites
Satu Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 As stated above ^. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Harry19 Posted January 7, 2016 Author Share Posted January 7, 2016 It's complicated because whilst i don't want her to get a real boyfriend because of a difficult childhood i don't want 'the benefits' either Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted January 7, 2016 Share Posted January 7, 2016 If she goes for it you are in, if she doesn't, you need to quit fooling yourself and forgot this friend. It's just holding you back from finding love. Yup. That's the epilogue to this fairy tale, and it's more likely than happily ever after. I've been seeing a lot of threads lately where the young guys get fixated on one girl and spend inordinate amounts of time wishing and hoping for something that's not going to happen. Someone needs to write a FAQ for friendzoned guys... like the NC Guide for dumpees. No amount of nice is ever going to make'em wet. Link to post Share on other sites
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