Merin Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 Originally posted by moimeme Now kids cut it out. Merin, what he means, clearly, is that the hottie portrayed in the avatar is not his type. So live with it. Brad Pitt's not my type and were he to post his avatar and ask about this stuff, I'd tell him so. And hope he would get it that he's not necessarily everybody's cup of tea. Moi, I could care less IF I'm his type. AND I don't care and do "Get it" that I'm not everybody's cup of tea based on looks alone and thats all okay and good to go. BUT yeah when someone wants to decide WHO I am based on what I look like, that sh*t isn't okay with me and I'm not going to let someone do that without saying how I feel about it. This is no different than some people being judged for looking geeky or whatever and not being given an opportunity to show WHO they are based on what they look like. So nope, I'm not going to just "Live with it" Link to post Share on other sites
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 Alot of my above post was meant to be rehtorical and fun/sarcastic fun - I'm not shallow. When I am it is just jokingly and I can laugh at myself. But I guess what I meant by wanting just one date with a hot/goodlooking guy, is like how a guy would feel with a gorgeous woman. It's like a confidence boost even if the emotional connection is not there. It would make a never-popular person feel like they've got the world by the tail, and people around me would look and say wow she snagged a hottie...it's just an ego thing, we all need it fed once in a while. That's all I meant. My exH was balding when I met him, so there was no question as to whether or not he'd lose his hair. He even looks a bit like Bruce Willis ... er okay, maybe more like Jason Alexander. But I didn't marry him nor leave him cuz of his looks. Brad Pitt does nothing for me either. Give me Matt Damon any day!!! Yummm. But, seriously, the roles that Nicolas Cage plays? ohhh my would love a guy like that....and he's not good looking. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 BUT yeah when someone wants to decide WHO I am based on what I look like, that sh*t isn't okay with me and I'm not going to let someone do that without saying how I feel about it. This is no different than some people being judged for looking geeky or whatever and not being given an opportunity to show WHO they are based on what they look like. So nope, I'm not going to just "Live with it" It's just a forum. It was just an example. Link to post Share on other sites
WantanS4 Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 Wow Merin...... your really opening up there........ It obviously bothers you....... and I'm sorry... to some degree. But.... I could spend the entire rest of my explaining to you that as I said before "I HAVEN'T READ THE THREAD"...... and "I'm ONLY REFERENCING THE AVATAR and diigirl's comment on 'Guys are always flocking to Merin's type'"........... but I won't....... cause you just won't open your mind enough to consider the idea. And there's what is soo amazingly sexy about a woman with a brain... looks... and a wallflower........ the fact that she just might OPEN HER MIND................ without automatically going into "LOOK........ HE"S AN a**h***!!! HE"S BEING AN a**h***!!!!" mode........... Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedInOC Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 Originally posted by WantanS4 OH... I forgot to add......... From my experience... the ultimate lesson I had forgotten a long time ago....... Don't force it..... let it roll......and roll with it. And that's applicable to everything in life..... sex.... money..... work.... relationships.... etc... etc.... etc...... You don't even know Merin, how do you know what "her" type is like? She has the personality to match her looks. Not something you see very often. Your judgement of her is ignorant and shallow. There's much more to Merin than looks, bro. Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedInOC Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 Originally posted by WantanS4 Wow Merin...... your really opening up there........ It obviously bothers you....... and I'm sorry... to some degree. But.... I could spend the entire rest of my explaining to you that as I said before "I HAVEN'T READ THE THREAD"...... and "I'm ONLY REFERENCING THE AVATAR and diigirl's comment on 'Guys are always flocking to Merin's type'"........... but I won't....... cause you just won't open your mind enough to consider the idea. And there's what is soo amazingly sexy about a woman with a brain... looks... and a wallflower........ the fact that she just might OPEN HER MIND................ without automatically going into "LOOK........ HE"S AN a**h***!!! HE"S BEING AN a**h***!!!!" mode........... They flock to Merin's type because she's good looking with a GREAT personality. Who WOULD NOT be attracted to that? You're very judgemental and defensive, a sure sign of insecurity. Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 Originally posted by moimeme It's just a forum. It was just an example. No kidding, it is a forum and so when someone makes reference to ME on a forum then I'm going to feel well within my right to speak for MYSELF. Originally posted by WantanS4 Wow Merin...... your really opening up there........ It obviously bothers you....... and I'm sorry... to some degree. But.... I could spend the entire rest of my explaining to you that as I said before "I HAVEN'T READ THE THREAD"...... and "I'm ONLY REFERENCING THE AVATAR and diigirl's comment on 'Guys are always flocking to Merin's type'"........... but I won't....... cause you just won't open your mind enough to consider the idea. And there's what is soo amazingly sexy about a woman with a brain... looks... and a wallflower........ the fact that she just might OPEN HER MIND................ without automatically going into "LOOK........ HE"S AN a**h***!!! HE"S BEING AN a**h***!!!!" mode........... You're right, you didn't read the whole thread, and perhaps you didn't even read Dgiirls FIRST ORGINAL post she not only asked if it was looks BUT she also asked if it was PERSONALITY. Once again it's amazing to me how you're saying I won't open my mind... WTF!? I'm not the person who's made ANY judgement call based on what YOU look like... so lets not talk about a closed mind. I didn't say you're an a**h***, you are very condesending IMO and have preconcieved ideas of how someone will be based on how they look... but ya know what the world is full of people just like that. I'm not going to argue with you any further about this... it's become disrespectful to Dgiirls orginal thread at this point and I'm not going to go there. You're more than welcome to judge me based on my looks all you'd like.. I totally accept that I'm not your "Type" and really thats fine, you're not my "Type" either BUT that isn't based on HOW YOU LOOK it's based on how you THINK. Link to post Share on other sites
WantanS4 Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 I wonder why the world spins in the direction it does. Link to post Share on other sites
Weird Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 dgiirl, Some of my advice/thoughts: -don't focus so much on your looks in the manner that you wish you had mroe guys hitting on you...you dont want to attract guys who simply care about looks. -Females into IT and other "geek" stuff are cool and sexy. I'd take a girl into this geek stuff anyday over one into superficial crap. In fact, I can't stand girly girls. I work with one (she isn't attractive or anything) but her personality is so damn annoying. Ugh. Funny thing is she is with some guy and I have no clue what he is thinking but i guess that just shows how people differ. -don't feel bad about being a wallflower or whatever...again, I bet I along with others would find that more attractive than someone who looked like Merin. NOTE Merin I am not making a comment on you...just making a comment on how females who look like you probably attract a lot of attention based simply on looks and how some of us guys don't find that appealing. I will admit I do have a stereotype of girls who are considered "hot" by the avg male population and that stereotype turns me off of them to the point that if I see one I will automatically lose any ionterest in her. Why do I think this way? Because observation has shown me the majority of girls who are considered "hot" are just too superficial and are way different personality wise from what I find attractive. Having said that, it isn't like I would totally pass off talking to a "hot" girl if she ever approached me or showed interest in me...not like that'll ever happen since I dont fit the part of the "hot guy" so no biggie. -unlike most, I will say there is the chance you may not find someone better. Everyone always says "you'll find someone better" but the truth is there are cases where someone better does not exist or it is very rare to find them. Hopefully for you you'll find a great guy who will give you the world but there is that possibility you won't. I've talked to many females since my last girlfriend and the truth is that all but one woman I have met are inferior to her and that has made me realize that regardless of what happened with my ex, she was a better all around package compared to other females. Sad thing is that just shows the state of females and not so much how great she was. hehe. -if you have a great personality then those guys smart and lucky enough will get to see it. Here's a *hug* for you and and while it prolly won't be any consolation, I dig females like you (based on what you have said) and would want to approach someone like you if I were in that position. Link to post Share on other sites
Weird Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 Oh yeah!! I can totally buy what you have been told about guys being intimidated by you being smart and stuff. That is true and the reason is that most guys aren't that bright or have some serious "manhood" issues and can't handle a woman being more intelligent than them. I for one would WELCOME being with a woman who was mroe intelligent than me which says something because not to be all cocky, I'm a VERY intelligent guy so if she was more intelligent than me then damn, that'd be something....and it'd be sexy too;) I guess I just don't have the "macho gene" where I feel inferior if my woman makes more money than me or is better than me in whatever area...I welcome it. In fact, I'd rather be the inferior one in the relationship as it'd just show how amazing the woman must be. Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted June 7, 2005 Share Posted June 7, 2005 You don't even know Merin, how do you know what "her" type is like Nobody knows anybody on here. We are only print. Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedInOC Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by moimeme Nobody knows anybody on here. We are only print. True, but you get to know someone's personality by what they post. Not necessarily their tone of course but you get a small peek into their cranial cavity. Merin has a lot going for her not because of her looks but the personality behind her. She has the rare qualities of good looks and a great personality. And she's pretty bright too. Hey Merin, I think I am talking myself into asking you out. Link to post Share on other sites
outdated Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC hey Merin, I think I am talking myself into asking you out. She knows too much about you now man.... Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by Merin retarded/easily distracted by shiny objects... **WWIU throws a quarter towards Merin, but gets distracted by how shiny it is, lays down and decides to drool and stare at the wall.** Merin, I've missed ya... Don't ever change. You're fine. Same with you Dgiirl! Nobody knows anybody on here. We are only print. We all may not "know" eachother but I think most wear their hearts on their sleeves and personality definately comes through. Some more than others - But I think you can tell a nice sincere person (Unless they're lying! ) or somebody who is a jerk-off. (Unless they're lying! ) Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedInOC Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by outdated She knows too much about you now man.... Maybe. But the new more confident me is starting to sprout forth. Ben Franklin said: "A man who loves himself has no rivals...." Link to post Share on other sites
outdated Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by ConfusedInOC Maybe. But the new more confident me is starting to sprout forth. Ben Franklin said: "A man who loves himself has no rivals...." Good for you man. You've come a long way... I think Ben Frankilin also said "A man that loves himself has an amazingly strong right hand. Or left." Link to post Share on other sites
moimeme Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 True, but you get to know someone's personality by what they post. Not necessarily their tone of course but you get a small peek into their cranial cavity Really. Not the case. People can be *very* different IRL than they are in cyberland. If it weren't the case, online dating sites would be 100% successful. Link to post Share on other sites
johan Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by moimeme ...People can be *very* different IRL than they are in cyberland. Not me. I am exactly the same in real life, except that I am sarcastic. Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedInOC Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by moimeme Really. Not the case. People can be *very* different IRL than they are in cyberland. If it weren't the case, online dating sites would be 100% successful. Apples and Oranges, Moi. On dating sites, you're putting your best foot forward, hiding your weaknesses and playing to your strengths. Here, you're being yourself. All your problems are before everyone and a peek into the real you is shown. Do you think I would go on a dating site and say "I've been a doormat for the past year with my ex girlfriend and now that I've figured out my problem...blah, blah, blah..."??? Hardly. All I am saying is that at least in a message forum, you get to see the person's opinions and a PEEK (not all of them) into their cranial cavity. On dating sites, yeah...well... I don't think many of them are very honest in their profiles. The ones that are aren't getting dates. Link to post Share on other sites
ConfusedInOC Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by outdated Good for you man. You've come a long way... I think Ben Frankilin also said "A man that loves himself has an amazingly strong right hand. Or left." ....or both! Thanks. Don't think for a minute I don't miss her NOW or would love to have her back. But I know asking/begging would be counter-productive. *IF* things end with her "rebound" relationship, she will be sad. She will be looking for a friend and she'll call her door mat of an Ex up to see if he wants to hang out and maybe go for a ride. Maybe I will, maybe I won't. Who knows?!? I hope by then I've met someone else who rocks my world and I'll be handling the relationship like I should have with HER. What I do know is that I will not run to her. We will never be able to pick up where we left off. She has to learn I am a much different man than I was even 2 months ago and I am NOT going to put up with her crap.... ....and I don't need her. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dgiirl Posted June 8, 2005 Author Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by moimeme People can be *very* different IRL than they are in cyberland. This is somewhat true, but I think the majority of the times it's our perception of people that is different. I've met my fair share of online geeks IRL. Most of the people acted the same. Some had a tough guy online persona, and then IRL i was totally shocked at how nice he was. Other's were totally outgoing on the forums and very introverted IRL. I think cyberland shows you a piece of their personality, but sometimes not the full picture. Link to post Share on other sites
em88 Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 What I do know is that I will not run to her. We will never be able to pick up where we left off. She has to learn I am a much different man than I was even 2 months ago and I am NOT going to put up with her crap.... ....and I don't need her. wow..after 2 months huh? i really admire your outlook on things. were u dumped though? how were u able to move on so well? Link to post Share on other sites
BigB Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by dgiirl This is somewhat true, but I think the majority of the times it's our perception of people that is different. I've met my fair share of online geeks IRL. Most of the people acted the same. Some had a tough guy online persona, and then IRL i was totally shocked at how nice he was. Other's were totally outgoing on the forums and very introverted IRL. I think cyberland shows you a piece of their personality, but sometimes not the full picture. most online tough guys are not tough guys IRL, I've been cussed out by so many 8 year olds on xbox live... I'm more outgoing and honest on forums, internet courage I guess, I'm more quiet and reserved IRL, once I get to know a person though I get more comfortable and open up. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dgiirl Posted June 8, 2005 Author Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by BigB most online tough guys are not tough guys IRL, I've been cussed out by so many 8 year olds on xbox live... lol yah I've learned to spot how old a person is based on their usage of "omg, lolzor, I pwnz0r u" with a bunch of other l33t swear words following I'm a pc gal, never played any consoles. I assume the age group is a little higher on pc's. I usually go to the "over age 30" servers. Tend to have more mature players there, but you do get your occasional idiot, especially if you play with a girl tag. Try it, I like to mess with the boys and tell them I'm a guy I'm more outgoing and honest on forums, internet courage I guess, I'm more quiet and reserved IRL, once I get to know a person though I get more comfortable and open up. I think it's the introvertness. You're in your comfort zone on the internet (home, computer, noone sees you). We need to break free and challenge the comfort zone Link to post Share on other sites
BigB Posted June 8, 2005 Share Posted June 8, 2005 Originally posted by dgiirl lol yah I've learned to spot how old a person is based on their usage of "omg, lolzor, I pwnz0r u" with a bunch of other l33t swear words following I'm a pc gal, never played any consoles. I assume the age group is a little higher on pc's. I usually go to the "over age 30" servers. Tend to have more mature players there, but you do get your occasional idiot, especially if you play with a girl tag. Try it, I like to mess with the boys and tell them I'm a guy Pc games are mostly text communication right? You should hear the crap that spews from the little kids on xbox live (we have microphones/ear-pieces) I've never met some many racist foul mouthed kids in all my life. I gave the microphone to my sister once during a game, that was funny. I got about 20 friend requests in the next 2 minutes. Originally posted by dgiirl I think it's the introvertness. You're in your comfort zone on the internet (home, computer, noone sees you). We need to break free and challenge the comfort zone exactly, it's to easy, I can't get embarrassed, I don't screw up words, I can say whatever I feel, and I'm not worried if anyone thinks I'm a tool. I need to think like that more IRL. I can do it when I've been drinking, and when I'm with a group of friends, but it's still difficult. Sometimes I wonder if I don't have a tiny bit of social anxiety disorder. Link to post Share on other sites
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