AMJ Posted January 29, 2016 Share Posted January 29, 2016 In your first post you asked- "why me?" She's starting a business? By chance, are you financially successful yourself? Could she be aware of this, and perhaps be setting you up to make a healthy investment in her business? She sounds like the type. I mean, the reason most young women have sex with older men is because they want a sugar daddy. It's interesting that you're so caught up in how her boyfriend only uses her for sex, but it's obvious that her entire appeal to you is all about how great the sex is. And this is a hot story- I'm not gonna lie. But be honest with yourself! If she wasn't attractive and wasn't having sex with you, what would be left between you two?? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 29, 2016 Author Share Posted January 29, 2016 So yea, go ahead and indulge in this fantasy. If you can view it as just that, then you'll probably be fine. Pretty much that. If you I had read my posts, you'd know already...I don't expect my future wife, long term partner from this girl. I fully expect her to stay with me until late March, early April, then pack off to New Zealand to be with her bf. Even if she does leave him for me...I still only expect a year or two before she dumps me for a younger guy. But so what? I am happy to spend whatever time I can with her... Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 29, 2016 Author Share Posted January 29, 2016 In your first post you asked- "why me?" She's starting a business? By chance, are you financially successful yourself? Could she be aware of this, and perhaps be setting you up to make a healthy investment in her business? She sounds like the type. I mean, the reason most young women have sex with older men is because they want a sugar daddy. It's interesting that you're so caught up in how her boyfriend only uses her for sex, but it's obvious that her entire appeal to you is all about how great the sex is. And this is a hot story- I'm not gonna lie. But be honest with yourself! If she wasn't attractive and wasn't having sex with you, what would be left between you two?? I bought her a step ladder for the business. She tried to give me the money...I said don't worry. The next day I found the money in my wallet. No...this is the point...it's not just sex...I spent three nights with her just relaxing, talking, sharing a good show. She had her time of month. She's smart, bright, funny, and interesting. There nothing wrong with a sexual attraction...but that's is not the only reason we are together. Link to post Share on other sites
IronZ Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 I don't have a girlfriend to cheat on...but whatever... That's the impression I got from your first post. Maybe I misread. Still though dude why are you into this chick so bad? I'm not judging or hating just saying, don't you want something serious and real? This is lust at it's most obvious. And that's ok too if you're ok with that. But is that what you want? Just a hookup? I doubt you'll get anything more than that. Sorry for the tough love, just calling it how I see it. Link to post Share on other sites
AMJ Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 No...this is the point...it's not just sex...I spent three nights with her just relaxing, talking, sharing a good show. She had her time of month. She's smart, bright, funny, and interesting. There nothing wrong with a sexual attraction...but that's is not the only reason we are together. Well, it's safe to say that many people do not let periods get in the way of sex. But anyway, out of all the time you've spent with her, only three nights did NOT involve sex, and you expect us to believe this demonstrates a significant connection OTHER than sex? All of your descriptions of this girl are about her sex appeal. Like, I don't know why it was necessary to get the play-by-play of your first sexual encounter, other than the fact that it's so vivid in your own mind, you needed to talk about it. Look, it's awesome you're having lots of fun with her, and have this strong attraction, and are having great sex, seriously. I just think you should admit that sex is the strongest bond you both have. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted January 30, 2016 Share Posted January 30, 2016 For a few days she was on her period, when she told me she phrased it: “you’re gonna be upset…but…” When I simply shrugged and said “So, happens right?” I can't identify with a real relationship where the girl thinks the guy will be "upset" because she has her period, and the guy thinks it's a testament to his solid intentions and their solid relationship that he is NOT upset. This just isn't a thing that seems normal to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 31, 2016 Author Share Posted January 31, 2016 Well, it's safe to say that many people do not let periods get in the way of sex. But anyway, out of all the time you've spent with her, only three nights did NOT involve sex, and you expect us to believe this demonstrates a significant connection OTHER than sex? All of your descriptions of this girl are about her sex appeal. Like, I don't know why it was necessary to get the play-by-play of your first sexual encounter, other than the fact that it's so vivid in your own mind, you needed to talk about it. Look, it's awesome you're having lots of fun with her, and have this strong attraction, and are having great sex, seriously. I just think you should admit that sex is the strongest bond you both have. 3 nights out of maybe 9, total...so a significant percentage. Besides..I think I've talked enough about that potential longevity of the relationship already. Basically...for as long as it lasts..I'm happy...full stop. Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 31, 2016 Author Share Posted January 31, 2016 I can't identify with a real relationship where the girl thinks the guy will be "upset" because she has her period, and the guy thinks it's a testament to his solid intentions and their solid relationship that he is NOT upset. This just isn't a thing that seems normal to me. Hey..we've been together two weeks...and in her mind is the doubt as to my motives... This isn't some 6 month relationship wet are talking about...this is a girl who's used to being used for sex...and seeking assurances it isn't.. Basically...put it into perspective Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 31, 2016 Author Share Posted January 31, 2016 That's the impression I got from your first post. Maybe I misread. Still though dude why are you into this chick so bad? I'm not judging or hating just saying, don't you want something serious and real? This is lust at it's most obvious. And that's ok too if you're ok with that. But is that what you want? Just a hookup? I doubt you'll get anything more than that. Sorry for the tough love, just calling it how I see it. This is not my first time around the Bush.... I know lust...I know love...I know the difference. I've had a fb...that was purely sexual... I definitely knew what that was about. My last 9 month relationship was lust personified...but I still feel in love with her, more than I realised until I ended it... I ended that relationship because HER motives were wrong..not because of mine... Sex and love are not such different creatures, just different aspects of the same. Yes, love can exist without lust, and vice versa... But ideally the two coexist. I have talked often and loudly about other aspects of her...have you read all of my posts? Link to post Share on other sites
Qboro90 Posted January 31, 2016 Share Posted January 31, 2016 I don't know if you mentioned it in your posts but when is this New Zealand D-Day? Is it next month? Next year? That's a big factor. For the sake of this lets say she's leaving in April ok? You've been with her now acting like this and sleeping together for what? 2 weeks now? That's incredibly small time frame and still in the infancy stages. The truth is you really haven't scratched the surface about this girl and who she really, just like she doesn't know about you either. This is true for any relationship. The longer it lasts, the more you will see and learn. Who is to say that at the end of February, you're absolutely sick of this girl and can't stand her and wish she was leaving tomorrow? You have no idea. That's why you shouldn't get accustomed to having these long term views, concerns, plans, pre conceptions. With her or anyone you date. At this stage, just enjoy and see where it goes on a daily basis. I think that you are treating it with a pretty rational mindset, but I also think that when you're with her you have this deep down hope that perhaps maybe she is going to end up and be something longer and more meangingful. You say you can tell she's falling for you. Be careful. This is a girl who is ****ing another man then facetiming with her BF like everything's normal. It's possible, like a lot of girls, that she's very good at getting guys to believe and feel what she's expressing through her words, body language, little idiosyncrasies. If this all goes the same way it has been, and then the day of her flight, she kisses you goodbye and leaves and you never see her again... Did she really fall for you? You're gonna be crushed if she just leaves like that. Any guy would. After 2 weeks you CANNOT bring up or start having talks with her about what her plans are down the line, or what she's gonna do if she leaves and hates it there. It's too soon, and you're gonna hurt yourself in the long run. What I would do is slowly just start inserting little confidence builders about her business and how proud she should be of what she built. Might get her to have this "you know what, you're right.. I did do something that took a lot of work and I'm proud of it and I don't want to give up on it and start over in another country right now". That will be easier than pulling on how she feels about you and asking her to choose between you and leaving for her BF. And you brought up having a talk with her at some point addressing how she treats her BF or the trust issue that what she's doing concerns you with. I think that's something you wait to talk about until another month passes at least. And even when you do, you can do so in a more light hearted way. Maybe even after sex. Half jokingly type tone where you ask her if she thinks it's a harmful to start a relationship with someone who cheats on their partner then leaves them for you. Starts the relationship with that little nugget of knowledge knowing that she's cheated on people she's been with and got away with it, how would you ever feel safe to trust her?. Definitely word it better so she doesn't feel like your asking her directly... But remember that it's not really gonna matter what she says even if you do ask her or have a talk about it. She's obviously gonna say something that makes you feel better about it or less concerned. "I've never cheated on anyone before, you mean so much to me I can't explain it. I'd never wanna hurt you ever". The whole charade. So don't be naive about that part. Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted January 31, 2016 Share Posted January 31, 2016 Hey..we've been together two weeks...and in her mind is the doubt as to my motives... I understand that. Every relationship had a two week mark, and I don't think it's in the realm of normal for the girl to think the guy will be mad that she's on her period or the guy think he's unique because he's not mad. Of course a lot of times relationships haven't even got sexual by two weeks. And there isn't a boyfriend etc. Anyway I was just telling you that I can't relate to your "period" scenario. Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted February 1, 2016 Author Share Posted February 1, 2016 I don't know if you mentioned it in your posts but when is this New Zealand D-Day? Is it next month? Next year? That's a big factor. For the sake of this lets say she's leaving in April ok? You've been with her now acting like this and sleeping together for what? 2 weeks now? That's incredibly small time frame and still in the infancy stages. The truth is you really haven't scratched the surface about this girl and who she really, just like she doesn't know about you either. This is true for any relationship. The longer it lasts, the more you will see and learn. Who is to say that at the end of February, you're absolutely sick of this girl and can't stand her and wish she was leaving tomorrow? You have no idea. That's why you shouldn't get accustomed to having these long term views, concerns, plans, pre conceptions. With her or anyone you date. At this stage, just enjoy and see where it goes on a daily basis. I think that you are treating it with a pretty rational mindset, but I also think that when you're with her you have this deep down hope that perhaps maybe she is going to end up and be something longer and more meangingful. You say you can tell she's falling for you. Be careful. This is a girl who is ****ing another man then facetiming with her BF like everything's normal. It's possible, like a lot of girls, that she's very good at getting guys to believe and feel what she's expressing through her words, body language, little idiosyncrasies. If this all goes the same way it has been, and then the day of her flight, she kisses you goodbye and leaves and you never see her again... Did she really fall for you? You're gonna be crushed if she just leaves like that. Any guy would. After 2 weeks you CANNOT bring up or start having talks with her about what her plans are down the line, or what she's gonna do if she leaves and hates it there. It's too soon, and you're gonna hurt yourself in the long run. What I would do is slowly just start inserting little confidence builders about her business and how proud she should be of what she built. Might get her to have this "you know what, you're right.. I did do something that took a lot of work and I'm proud of it and I don't want to give up on it and start over in another country right now". That will be easier than pulling on how she feels about you and asking her to choose between you and leaving for her BF. And you brought up having a talk with her at some point addressing how she treats her BF or the trust issue that what she's doing concerns you with. I think that's something you wait to talk about until another month passes at least. And even when you do, you can do so in a more light hearted way. Maybe even after sex. Half jokingly type tone where you ask her if she thinks it's a harmful to start a relationship with someone who cheats on their partner then leaves them for you. Starts the relationship with that little nugget of knowledge knowing that she's cheated on people she's been with and got away with it, how would you ever feel safe to trust her?. Definitely word it better so she doesn't feel like your asking her directly... But remember that it's not really gonna matter what she says even if you do ask her or have a talk about it. She's obviously gonna say something that makes you feel better about it or less concerned. "I've never cheated on anyone before, you mean so much to me I can't explain it. I'd never wanna hurt you ever". The whole charade. So don't be naive about that part. Wow, wise words...thanks. I agree about the possibility she is a matter manipulator of emotions...I get that...I do. She's in Vietnam now, visiting family, the first person she spoke to when she's got hey new SIM was me. (I know because of the "online" time stamp in Viber.) What I find the oddest is she still insists her bf is worth persisting with, even though she had admitted he is perhaps the "wrong partner for me" here she is spending all her free time with me, talking freely about things she "can't talk to anyone else about"... If she was manipulating me..don't you think she'd be talking about how she wants to dump him, how he didn't treat her right, that she's feels trapped..etc Surely she's play the victim card to keep me hooked...give me just enough to keep me going... But she's not, at almost every opportunity she's tells me that her plans with him are firm, that she's loves him, that she's gets along easily with him. If she was manipulating me, she'd be giving me more... On her business...first day in Vietnam she texted me that she'd "missed Mel" meaning Melbourne. She then talked about hey business, worrying that it'd going okay. I did indeed speak about how proud I was of her achievement, and that I could see her running a number of businesses... That again confused me..why set up a business only to leave it...she is strong, independent girl...eldest daughter of a wealthy family (she sent pictures of her family house!), yes she acts like a puppy dog chasing this bf around the world... Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted February 1, 2016 Author Share Posted February 1, 2016 I understand that. Every relationship had a two week mark, and I don't think it's in the realm of normal for the girl to think the guy will be mad that she's on her period or the guy think he's unique because he's not mad. Of course a lot of times relationships haven't even got sexual by two weeks. And there isn't a boyfriend etc. Anyway I was just telling you that I can't relate to your "period" scenario. Don't worry so much about this aspect..she said it jokingly, with a laugh...not a serious concern...I probably shouldn't have mentioned it. Link to post Share on other sites
Happy-Dayze Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 (edited) I don't have a girlfriend to cheat on...but whatever... Just had a quick skim through this monster thread. All seems very high school drama - but then I read you are 48. Is this normal for you or are we having a bit of a midlife crisis ? Surely old enough to know better. I mean does your sense of morals regarding cheating extend only as far as your immediate partner ? You do realize she is half your age and she has a committed boyfriend who is the same age who she has clearly stated she does not intend to leave. I actually feel a little bit sick to be honest. Can't imagine being the poor guy who has been overseas and gets home to find his girl has been doing the nasty with dirty grandpa. That would scar you for life. But hey you're "not cheating" right so its all ok ? Also I love the way you try to make out like the BF is the douche to try and justify your own poor behavior. Whatever helps you sleep (with his girlfriend) at night I guess .... At least if you were 17 or something you could right it off as being young and stupid. Edited February 2, 2016 by Happy-Dayze 6 Link to post Share on other sites
Qboro90 Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 Wow, wise words...thanks. I agree about the possibility she is a matter manipulator of emotions...I get that...I do. She's in Vietnam now, visiting family, the first person she spoke to when she's got hey new SIM was me. (I know because of the "online" time stamp in Viber.) What I find the oddest is she still insists her bf is worth persisting with, even though she had admitted he is perhaps the "wrong partner for me" here she is spending all her free time with me, talking freely about things she "can't talk to anyone else about"... If she was manipulating me..don't you think she'd be talking about how she wants to dump him, how he didn't treat her right, that she's feels trapped..etc Surely she's play the victim card to keep me hooked...give me just enough to keep me going... But she's not, at almost every opportunity she's tells me that her plans with him are firm, that she's loves him, that she's gets along easily with him. If she was manipulating me, she'd be giving me more... On her business...first day in Vietnam she texted me that she'd "missed Mel" meaning Melbourne. She then talked about hey business, worrying that it'd going okay. I did indeed speak about how proud I was of her achievement, and that I could see her running a number of businesses... That again confused me..why set up a business only to leave it...she is strong, independent girl...eldest daughter of a wealthy family (she sent pictures of her family house!), yes she acts like a puppy dog chasing this bf around the world... Well then I think it's necessary to point out that you are straddling some contradicting statements and beliefs about her then. You say she's not manipulating you ... Then you go into detail and why you feel like she's falling for you and how she's got real feelings for you that go deeper than just a physical attraction. But follow that up by saying she's been very clear and unwavering on the fact that she has no intentions of leaving her BF whom she loves very much and her plans to leave and go to NZ have not been altered or made to feel like she's eventually going to back out at all. All I'm saying is I think you should hold yourself back from thinking she's falling head over heels for you more and more with each passing day and letting that hope build up that eventually she's going to bail on her BF and her trip. Like I said in my first post... Just enjoy the ride while it lasts. It's 2 weeks, hardly anything set in stone or with a strong foundation for the future. You might not even be talking to her 2 weeks from now. So just caution yourself from looking at little comments or the way you two interact with such detail and attention because you run the risk of making it out to be more than it is too soon. Even if it all makes perfect sense in your eyes and mind. 2 weeks isn't enough time to know what kind of girl she is and what you can expect down the line from her. Link to post Share on other sites
Happy-Dayze Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 (edited) Like I said in my first post... Just enjoy the ride while it lasts. ... Even if it all makes perfect sense in your eyes and mind. 2 weeks isn't enough time to know what kind of girl she is and what you can expect down the line from her. We must not be reading the same thread. She claims to love her boyfriend and be firm in her commitment to move overseas with him yet she is banging an old dude on the side and then has skype calls to her boyfriend while he sits in the same room listening. I'm no Sherlock Holmes but I think 2 weeks is more then enough to understand the type of person she is. There are good and bad ways to have fun casual sex and enjoy the ride. I don't even really have a problem with the age - If she was single I would probably give the OP a high five. But what he described going on is just plain nasty. Edited February 2, 2016 by Happy-Dayze 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Qboro90 Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 We must not be reading the same thread. She claims to love her boyfriend and be firm in her commitment to move overseas with him yet she is banging an old dude on the side and then has skype calls to her boyfriend while he sits in the same room listening. I'm no Sherlock Holmes but I think 2 weeks is more then enough to understand the type of person she is. There are good and bad ways to have fun casual sex and enjoy the ride. I don't even really have a problem with the age - If she was single I would probably give the OP a high five. But what he described going on is just plain nasty. I don't understand what point you're trying to make.... The girl is no angel. I never said she was. If you would give the OP a high five for Doing this if she was single, then what is so obscene and nasty to you? That would be contradictory. We're not here to lecture the girl or condone her behavior. The OP doesn't care about being the other man, and doesn't care about embarrassing the BF with the things they're doing together. 2 weeks isn't enough time to know everything there is to know about anybody. You can know that you like being around and are attracted to someone in 2 minutes. But you can't know what they're like until you've spent an extended period of time with one another. A lot comes out after the honeymoon phase wears off... And when real world issues start needing to be addressed and interacting with their affair... When that happens he will learn more about her Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted February 2, 2016 Author Share Posted February 2, 2016 I don't understand what point you're trying to make.... The girl is no angel. I never said she was. If you would give the OP a high five for Doing this if she was single, then what is so obscene and nasty to you? That would be contradictory. We're not here to lecture the girl or condone her behavior. The OP doesn't care about being the other man, and doesn't care about embarrassing the BF with the things they're doing together. 2 weeks isn't enough time to know everything there is to know about anybody. You can know that you like being around and are attracted to someone in 2 minutes. But you can't know what they're like until you've spent an extended period of time with one another. A lot comes out after the honeymoon phase wears off... And when real world issues start needing to be addressed and interacting with their affair... When that happens he will learn more about her True...time will tell. Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted February 2, 2016 Author Share Posted February 2, 2016 Just had a quick skim through this monster thread. All seems very high school drama - but then I read you are 48. Is this normal for you or are we having a bit of a midlife crisis ? Surely old enough to know better. I mean does your sense of morals regarding cheating extend only as far as your immediate partner ? You do realize she is half your age and she has a committed boyfriend who is the same age who she has clearly stated she does not intend to leave. I actually feel a little bit sick to be honest. Can't imagine being the poor guy who has been overseas and gets home to find his girl has been doing the nasty with dirty grandpa. That would scar you for life. But hey you're "not cheating" right so its all ok ? Also I love the way you try to make out like the BF is the douche to try and justify your own poor behavior. Whatever helps you sleep (with his girlfriend) at night I guess .... At least if you were 17 or something you could right it off as being young and stupid. Hey boyfriend is older too. As for committed...this is my point. I know what she says...but I can tell through her actions what she feels. She I'd in a committed relationship? She's dated this guy about 6 months, never lived together, he then went to India, so far another 6 months... She's committed, yet opens a business, pours her money, time, and energy into establishing..only to simply leave it? Just a few days in Vietnam, she's already worrying about it. And then, of course, she's happily cheating on him with me, and, more importantly, she started it! I didn't go out of my way to charm and seduce her, she led That march. So, no I don't think she is committed, I think she wants an escape from this relationship. She had literary told me "I have to, doesn't matter what I want to do, I have to TRY with him" Link to post Share on other sites
VeveCakes Posted February 2, 2016 Share Posted February 2, 2016 Can you just read through this thread about 5 times then remember your age and how smart you should be by now, give yourself a smack upside the head and be done with it already. You can't know her feelings for her BF or her intentions. It doesn't matter anyways. Use your other head and do some serious thinking. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted February 2, 2016 Author Share Posted February 2, 2016 Can you just read through this thread about 5 times then remember your age and how smart you should be by now, give yourself a smack upside the head and be done with it already. You can't know her feelings for her BF or her intentions. It doesn't matter anyways. Use your other head and do some serious thinking. Well I kind of have to while she's in Vietnam. I guess she is too. Link to post Share on other sites
Happy-Dayze Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 (edited) I don't understand what point you're trying to make.... The girl is no angel. I never said she was. If you would give the OP a high five for Doing this if she was single, then what is so obscene and nasty to you? Not contradictory at all - if you're causing no harm you're alright with me. As for what is obscene and nasty ? We're not here to lecture the girl or condone her behavior. The OP doesn't care about being the other man, and doesn't care about embarrassing the BF with the things they're doing together. ^^^This^^^ Seriously - Karma is a bitch. Normally by 48 most people have learnt that treating other people like **** comes back to bite you in the ass. It doesn't even seem to cross the OP's mind that its him just as much as the girls behavior that is wrong here - which is frankly quite scary. Threads from the "other men" or "other women" on this site almost always detail how they feel completely terrible about what they are doing as they know its a horrible thing to cheat or be cheated on. The OP it doesn't even seem to cross his mind - no guilt or remorse whatsoever. Has the gall to make out the real boyfriend is the "bad guy". I hope he is deluded enough to actually play this out and develop real feelings for her. See how that works out for him. But you can't know what they're like until you've spent an extended period of time with one another. A lot comes out after the honeymoon phase wears off... Indeed it does - and the OP can save himself the suspense and see exactly how she treats committed partners when the honeymoon period wears off or he goes overseas on business by simply looking at how she treats her current boyfriend. People tend to think "it'll be different with me". It seldom ever is. Edited February 3, 2016 by Happy-Dayze 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted February 3, 2016 Author Share Posted February 3, 2016 (edited) Not contradictory at all - if you're causing no harm you're alright with me. As for what is obscene and nasty ? ^^^This^^^ Seriously - Karma is a bitch. Normally by 48 most people have learnt that treating other people like **** comes back to bite you in the ass. It doesn't even seem to cross the OP's mind that its him just as much as the girls behavior that is wrong here - which is frankly quite scary. Threads from the "other men" or "other women" on this site almost always detail how they feel completely terrible about what they are doing as they know its a horrible thing to cheat or be cheated on. The OP it doesn't even seem to cross his mind - no guilt or remorse whatsoever. Has the gall to make out the real boyfriend is the "bad guy". I hope he is deluded enough to actually play this out and develop real feelings for her. See how that works out for him. Indeed it does - and the OP can save himself the suspense and see exactly how she treats committed partners when the honeymoon period wears off or he goes overseas on business by simply looking at how she treats her current boyfriend. People tend to think "it'll be different with me". It seldom ever is. You know (and don't fall off you chair) you're right. Now she is in Vietnam, I have had a chance to think long and hard. She's too young for me, by about a decade. She claims that she loves this guy so much that she will sacrifice everything to go off and live with him, YET opens a business, and shacks up with me. If she truly DOESN'T want to go to New Zealand, if she TRULY thinks he's not the right guy...break up with him FIRST... Remember, she started the move from friendship to sex, i didn't seduce her away from him... As to why I put down her BF...I would anyway even if I wasn't involved with her... I find his behavior obsessive, borderline dangerous. He MAKES her video chat EVERY NIGHT, regardless of her mood, how hard she's worked etc He does so when it's convenient for HIM in HIS time zone, even if this means it very late in Australia. He makes her show him the room…where’s the trust? He tells her he "f'ing loves" her about 10 times a call. HJe says he f'ing misses her abotu 10 times a call He says: "I would do ANYTHING FOR YOU, ANYTHING" about ten times a night He MADE her turn off the light so he can see she’s going to bed before finishing a video chat (She promptly turns it on again afterwards). He will ring, and if she doesn’t answer KEEP RINGING, I mean 20-30 times He will BOMBARD her with text messages that range from accusative, to apologising, to declaring his endless love, back to accusatory…it’s really quite extreme. But the worst part is she seems to think this is all OK. This is normal relationship behaviour. She just dutifully does what he asks, even though she gets angry and pouty about it, she still does it… This is a controlling, jealous, obsessive guy…THAT’S why I don’t think she should go off and live with him. THAT’S why I tend to forgive her infidelity, I think underneath all her stubborn self-assurance, she’s really doubting her resolve to go off with this guy. HOWEVER. That’s HER decision… It doesn’t excuse her cheating. It doesn’t excuse mine. Last night I told her that she either breaks up with the boyfriend, or I will simply stop seeing her. If she is so set on this guy she can’t see a way out…then she can do so on her own, I won’t be her backup boyfriend/good time guy anymore. Edited February 3, 2016 by yxalitis Link to post Share on other sites
scrapbooker Posted February 3, 2016 Share Posted February 3, 2016 How can a man miles and miles away MAKE someone sit at their computer? 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted February 3, 2016 Author Share Posted February 3, 2016 How can a man miles and miles away MAKE someone sit at their computer? By asking and nagging and demanding until she does... Exactly my point... She just DOES... Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts